Ejaculation can happen in a matter of a min or two for me and then again it can take a very long time. It all depends on the mental state. If I allow worry or stressful things to occupy my mind, its difficult. I can even be think about good things but those can also be a distraction. If he has any anxiety or is self conscience about his sexual performance or body appearance in front of you, that can inhibit it as well. He needs to release his mind so he can allow himself to get turned on enough that his mind will send the signal to the prostate gland and seminal vesicals to actually build up the contents needed and then fire. Its all physiology. The brain is the largest sex organ in the body.
He doesn't share his problems with me. he is quite reserved. I think this could be a reason too.. how can i encourage him to talk to me?
The best thing is to not push it out of him but assure him you will not be critical of anything he shares with you so its not a threatening environment. As he starts to trust you, he can then open up and as he talkes about things, he will get them off his chest. Once he is able to have those things out in the open, he will better be able to focus. You will, be amazed at how well he will be able to release (ejaculate) once all the tension is addressed.
I understand the need for him to trust me b4 he can open up issues with me. But before i ask on this website, i've insulted him and told him that i regret being with him. I was extremely frustrated because he avoids tellin me reasons but expects me to endure while reassurin me that it is not my fault he can't ejaculate. He ignored me since and keep minimal contact. I could still talk to him but he'd be cold. He has been withdrawing from talking and performing any act of intimacy. I intend to find out whatever i can on the internet before talkin to him again about it. Im afraid if he will be defensive since i've approached him this way. Im also thinkin if i should jus leave him alone ( like silent break up unless he sincerely wants to talk to me without me havin to ask if he is ok ) since i've hurt him.
It is certainly an unusual aexual phenomenan for a sexually healthy guy to not be able to ejaculate, perhaps he is trying too hard to not cum too quickly that he's actually mentally preventing himself from letting go... if he won't talk about it with you I can only suggest he's not going to be a good long-term partner for you because how can a deep & loving romance evolve & last without both persons talking to each other about anything & everything that affects their relationship and wellbeing?
Honestly, i think so too.. you could read my reply under "jpmoore89" comments. Maybe that is possible too. maybe he has being doin that often till he has ejaculation problems? he told me before that he use to have a partner who'd prefer he last in bed for a long time. While i was too quick. I was quite upset with his statement and slightly pissed. We argued and he said other woman would have prefered his 'capability'. I had it somewhere in my mind it could be possible that i wasn't attractive enough.
Tbh, I think guys who are proud that they can last a long time are missing out on the pure joys of penetrative penis-vagina sex because they are concentrating so much on achieving a delayed orgasm that they're not properly feeling truly beautiful sexual pleasure when they're inside their sexual partner. It's a macho thing for many of them and not only does it make them lose touch with the almost electrical senses of sexual excitement that makes sexual intercourse one of the most beautiful physical sexual pleasures of all, but because they're so intent on their "long-lasting" performance than they're not appreciating that it's probably exttenely oring to her, making it an experience she just hopes will be over and done with as soon as possible.
To me - and I do appreciate it's not the same for everyone, so I stress these are my personal feelings - the combination of 50 - 60 mins foreplay + 10 - 15 mins of penetrative sex are the ideal way to make love because it enables both of us to enjoy the truly sensational + beautiful pleasures that are experienced when we area being passionately sexual with each other.
most common explanations:
-stress
-illness
-alcohol or recreational drug use
if he masturbates often, it's possible that he's gotten used to his own grip (which no woman will ever be tighter than).
if he's avoiding your questions, he's obviously embarrassed (and i don't blame him, since you asking puts him on the spot). it could also be a sign of guilt- maybe he's hiding something from you, is in the closet, or just isn't into you.
how long has this been an issue? have you asked him how he's doing? are things otherwise fine between you?
Stress-yes illness-yes alcohol or recreational drug use-yes Smokes-yes if he masturbates often, it's possible that he's gotten used to his own grip (which no woman will ever be tighter than) -possibly yes if he's avoiding your questions, he's obviously embarrassed (and i don't blame him, since you asking puts him on the spot).- No i dont think so always stiff for no apparent reason and wants to be entertained. it could also be a sign of guilt- maybe he's hiding something from you, is in the closet, or just isn't into you.-possibly both. how long has this been an issue? Since 2013 have you asked him how he's doing? No, got tired of doin that. are things otherwise fine between you? We are pretty much distant now but we're still in contact if we want to. No grudges but a depleting love affair. P. s i am not addicted to vices. Do not consume drugs, drink or smoke.
My boyfriend (now husband) was the same way when I first met him. It was like pulling teeth to find out why. He needed a specific type of sex. Once I got it out of him it was easy to get him to cum.
I see.. so i need to be more experimental in bed?
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What's Your Opinion? Sign Up Now!Maybe he's dehydrated or intoxicated beforehand?
At first i thought this is the reason why too. But when i read up online supposingly excessive alcohol comsumption leads to both erectile dysfunction and delayed ejaculation. He is neither both. He is erected and can't ejaculate.
Consumption*
Hmm, maybe consult a doctor if it still progresses? But I think he's embarassed when you ask those questions, that's why he'd rather not talk about it :/
There can be multiple reasons, 1. Delayed ejaculation 2. you are probably way too wet for him to feel 3. not enough foreplay 4. distraction... and 5. worst of all, lack of interest in you. I am not trolling these are genuine causes of not being able to have orgasm or taking too long.
I know u aren't thanks for sharing.
It's called delayed ejaculation, I have it too and I don't see it as being a big deal. If your boyfriend is circumcised, that could be a big part of it. If you want my advice, if he doesn't seem bothered by it don't let it bother you. My ex-girlfriends insecurity about it was more of an impediment to our sex life than the actual issue.
Yeap, circumcised. I suppose it makes a big difference to me because i have desires which i need help from him to satisfy. I dont think it is possible for me to not be bothered or turn a blind eye. I am giving myself to only him with hopes he'd treat me with love and passion.. voicing myself and seekin his help to satisfy me too shouldn't be an issue if he'd love me enough.. i guess it is a sign that we're not meant to be and so were you with your ex-gfs. Thanks for your opinion which i see as a new perspective and a knowledge gain.
Getting my response deleted doesn't make what I said any less true. I really hope you'll consider how shitty your line of thinking is.
This is my post. I dominate it. Deal with your own emotions.
SSRI?
What is that?
Selective serotonin re-uptake inhibitors or serotonin-specific reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs) are a class of drugs that are typically used as antidepressants in the treatment of major depressive disorder and anxiety disorders.
SSRIs can cause various types of sexual dysfunction such as anorgasmia, erectile dysfunction, diminished libido, genital numbness, and sexual anhedonia (pleasureless orgasm). Sexual problems are common with SSRIs. Poor sexual function is also one of the most common reasons people stop the medication.
en.wikipedia.org/.../Selective_serotonin_reuptake_inhibitor
Thanks for sharing ☺
it's a disease.
O. M. G 😣
sorry
Its ok, thanks for your comment.
Maybe you have a huge pussy? Let him fuck your ass and see if he finishes faster.
Really? Come on, she is really trying here. Be kind to her and give her some real advice or none at all.
Hmm given the time i was quite open to exploring whatever might help.. but it didn't 😕
got that too. it's basically a head-controlled issue. i even sometime are just too aroused so i cannot cum anymore 😉
That is nice to know if it is true.. but is it possible to be mostly everytime we've been together for years?
mh. probs not
Thanks for the information
poor dick need some medical help.
Ya, possibly. thanks for your comment.
Why wasting time with it?
Honestly i admire the man himself. It didn't dawn on me as a waste of time since i use to have so much love to give.
May be he has cum before he sees you
Maybe 😥 thanks for sharing.
Why the tear
The thought him ejaculatin on his own and not helpin me out. anyway, thanks for sharing your comment.
does he eventually ejaculate and how long is too long
Nope. If someday, hopefully not, u can't ejaculate u'll know the duration.
it's normal. i am straight and i love lesbian porn because it's better to watch more boobs and pussies than a dick
Ok, thanks for the information.
Sounds like delayed ejaculation.
Its a recognized medical problem.
I know but how come he can stay errected?
Because he has more stamina to do it in better way and satisfy the other person.
It is good sign. If he don't ejaculate then it is problem.
No he does not at all. On extreme rare occasions. He doesn't seem to want to seek medical attention.
If he ejaculate then he doesn't need any medical attention.
He said he did 'inside' but i didn't feel it 😕 "outside" i've never seen it happen.
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