Why do guys like virgins?

[Anonymous]

I'm 16 and I'm proud to be a virgin although most of my friends aren't. Some like me are but they're ashamed to admit it and almost NONE of my guy friends who are virgins will even bring up this subject. Anyway I think it's best to wait for the right person than to seem easy. But I was wondering why guys like virgins so much? There's this rude boy in my school always flirting and talking dirty, he was talking about how he'd 'love to do me' because I'm a virgin. >_> If people like virgins then why do you think it's considered a "shame" for some to be one?

[ravvo99]

Read what evangelina214 wrote. Read it well. This is incredibly true and her response was wise beyond her years, as she says she is 16.

Young guys love virgins because they feel like they are conquering something. It feels like an accomplishment to be first. They get to plant their flag like conquistadors, so to speak. Also a lot of younger guys mistakenly think that virginal sex is better (its not), is tighter (not really), is safe from STDs (its not) or is less likely to notice if they are bad (well that's true, but anyone can still tell if its terrible).

This might not be hugely helpful to you at your current age, but come late teens and early twenties guys begin to shift away from virgins. They become viewed as what they are: inexperienced and overly emotional about something that a non-virginal guy likely (though not universally) views as something not so big. Guys my age tend to avoid virgins if we have a choice when getting involved with someone. My personal experience has showed that every girl whose virginity I have eased them out of has become very much attached to my social circle for years, whether I want them there or not. So older guys prefer girls with some experience who know what they want and won't immediately become clingy to anyone who is nice to them after sex. (note: this sentence is based on generalizations. everyone is unique, I only comment on trends)

Add in that guys hate having their virginity because to males it is a evolutionary imperitive to have many partners in a lifetime. To women it is more important, evolutionarily, to have a few high quality guys. Now taking it more socially: guys appreciate some promiscuity among guys. We almost reward it at our most juvenile. Ladies on the other hand should have enough experience to know what they like and don't like, but is probably socially best to pick carefully.

In short: this whole obsession with virginity fades fast once high school ends. In some ways it inverts as the virgins become less desirable with time (though there is still something sweet about being first, it has no *real* benefits and I'd rather just avoid it all together for the complications it can bring). Do what you want and ignore the social pressures. Have sex whenever you feel ready and hold out til then. If a guy is obsessed with virgin vs non-virgin he has a good bit of mental maturing to do to realize that its not such a big thing, and especially not such a big plus (though everyone has to start with a V-card)

[PilatesGuy]

I don't know any guys who particularly do like virgins, but then I'm not at school any more. Maybe it's a young guy thing.

I guess some guys might think it's important to be the first person a girl has sex with, so that she'll always remember him, but I can't help thinking that if it's bad sex or he's a asshole then she'll always remember him for those reasons, which isn't so good.

I guess for other people it's a kind of throwback to some kind of medieval mentality, when virginity was considered a prize because it proved that any child you had with a woman who'd never had sex was definitely your child, or maybe something to do with the church and original sin but surely in these days everyone thinks that's bullsh*t.

Anyway, I don't think it's any big deal to be a virgin, any more than it's a big deal to not be a virgin. Life isn't a competition and you don't get any more prizes for not having sex than you do for having it.

Personally I wouldn't make a big deal out of it either way.

Do bear in mind that it's very possible that the guy you save yourself for could be rubbish in bed, and then blame you for it - and that if/when you finally do get to have the wonderful, uninhibited, life-enhancing, joyous sex you deserve you'll probably be wondering why you were such a tight-ass and why you didn't let yourself enjoy that pleasure years before.

[peace-love-couture]

Not all guys like virgins,many guys prefer experienced girls over virgins.

Young guys like virgins.For most it's insecurity,the fact that she can't tell if it was bad(which is not true),and cannot compare to past lovers.That's insecurity.

For others,they have the misconception that virgins can not have any sort of STD,which is untrue.There are virgins who shoot up,who go to unsanitary clinics,tattoos,piercing etc.You can easily catch an STD out of those

For some,it's the mental thought of "conquering" which is stupid and lame.

I'm a virgin,16 but I'm not proud or ashamed of it.It isn't an accomplishment or achievement and is neither good or bad.

No one ever said it was a shame,you said that.

Not all guys like virgins,some can't stand virgins,and there's nothing wrong with that.Some guys prefer girls who know what they're doing and know what they like and want.

[Rinaxo]

It's your own personal preference. Some people are just horny so they have sex earlier are they just don't think of it as something you should only share with someone you love. Some people think that they should wait for the right person and are maybe just not horny at all. no one shouldn't feel ashamed of their own personal choices. By the way, that boy who said he wants to do you, he just wants to cause he probably has a really small d*** and needs the tightness of a virgin.

[isdbafjdnmvjsn]

Same. I'm 16 and a virgin, and most of my friends aren't. The ones who are virgins are completely embarrassed, which is total bull. I don't think it's shameful to be a virgin, it's actually something you should be proud of.

But anyway guys like virgins cause they're "tighter" down there, and less experienced which means the guy is less pressured to perform well hah. And doing a virgin is some sort of an accomplishment, because they're taking it away from you

[PilatesGuy]

Virgins aren't any tighter than any other childless woman. That's nonsense. If you're properly aroused, relaxed and lubricated then you'll not feel any different from any other young woman. Where do people get these ideas from? They're not taking anything away from you. Chances are you broke your hymen doing sports or riding your bicycle or dancing years ago. The only thing is that they'll be your first one, so you'll remember them. That's it. All the rest is myth and bullsh*t.

[isdbafjdnmvjsn]

Maybe that's true. You've probably actually been with virgin women, I haven't hah. However I'm just giving my personal insight. My best friend has a boyfriend. They were both virgins, he fingered her blah blah blah and she said one finger was hard to fit in. After all of the fingering, she said it became a bit looser and now he could fit in 2 fingers comfortably, finally they had sex. So that's where I GET MY 'IDEA' FROM. And yeah, not PHYSICALLY but EMOTIONALLY they are taking something away from you.

[Mook13]

I agree I’m 16 and a virgin too and I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that 🤷🏽‍♀️

[cjwright79]

They are simply projecting their apprehension about meeting God onto you.

[here4you]

cause not being a virgin is in right now...idk why though

I think it has something to do with being a rebel

[jacquesvol]

Virginity has been a big item in religion and education for many centuries and in most cultures.

That has some heavy influence on the feelings of people.

Why was this a big item? Sexuality was seriously controlled in old times.

-For health reasons: In the past centuries, without much diagnostic knowledge and medication available, any pregnancy or illness could spell 'death'. Sex is a way of getting pregnant and of getting illnesses. (even other illnesses than STD's)

-It was also a way to enforce the incest taboo (people knew vaguely that incest could lead to health problems) They also knew that 'nothing propinx like propinquity' and in an agrarian societies people lived closely together.

-For economic reasons: people had no retirement plans, no pensions and depended on their children and savings to stay alive after the day they were to old to hunt or work. It was thus of vital importance to keep as much money as possible in the family and not to let some "bad son" or bad daughter" take a part of it away through getting married to the wrong people (read poorer people) or let a wife run away, taking her dowry with her.

Many reasons why sexuality had to be controlled thus. (no BC available then)

Since girls were more easily controlled then (women had less rights) and considered 'mindless beings' the focus was on feminine virginity (Mary was said to be a miraculous virgin, and so were about all female saints, remember)

[chiefnavarro]

hmmm I just don't like the idea of taking a promiscuous women. Its kinda gross. I get grossed out. Also people that say that this comes from insecurity are just wrong. if anything I'm far more secure because I would rather be alone then with somebody that would make unhappy.

[jessehenrichs]

That's not right virgins should be very respected. Me personally I have never been with a virgin but I have always fantasized about being with a virgin going the full commitment and marrying them. For the simple reason they know nothing of sex. And they are more likely not to cheat.