Boyfriend was caught calling and texting escorts, denies ever meeting in person..

[Anonymous]

I recently discovered that my long term boyfriend has been calling escorts he found on craigslist. On one occasion he exchanged a series of text messages with one and she sent him a few pictures via text at like 3am. The calls are only 1 minute long (I looked at his phone bill, and googled the suspicious numbers, and all came up as ads on craigslist, he knows this, when I became suspicious he gave me the password to access his bill online). After initially denying it he eventually admitted that yes, he did call but he never met any of them. He said it gets him off and it's been going on for about a year. I will admit that I have definitely neglected him sexually (not that I am excusing his behavior, but if I'm laying it all out there I have to be honest). I really don't know what to think, could this possibly be the truth? Do guys do this? And why are the calls only 1 minute? I just don't get why he can't look at normal p*rn and get off that way..

[Anonymous]

A man who is conspiring to cheat (or has cheated, you don't know) behind your back is obviously not the most honest person. So if you do ask him questions don't expect him to confess the truth. Use your judgment and intuition to discern if he is lying to you or not. Don't make excuses for him, you will know.

It sounds highly unlikely that someone would just call escorts and recieve pictures from them, and that's it. Escorts are glorified prostitutes, they are there for sex. Also if he has no problem doing that behind your back, how can you not assume that he isn't having sex with them?

If you did neglect him sexually that's still no excuse to cheat. It may be a reason for him to WANT more sex, but in mature relationships people communicate and try to work things out, not call hookers at the first sign of problems.

[arreola]

That's entirely possible. I used to do that as well: took a look at escort ads, even call them to ask about their rates, but then stopping the call and never went to one. Yes, in your case (and mine) it seems that is caused by you having neglected him sexually, but in other cases it has nothing to do with that: even guys with a lot of sexual activity with their significant others can cheat, look at p*rn, or having sex with escorts, but they have a different kind of problem

[Christie67]

Can I ask how you handled the situation. The EXACT same thing just happened to me this weekend. Like word for word of what your boyfriend said to you.

[Microbehunter]

May after one minute he remembered you and the guilt bank built up to the intolerable level each time, that's why he stopped after one minutes. Just like me, I sometimes do something then it reaches a certain limit I would be like Oh my god, no I am not going to do that. It happens. Though what you experienced with him when he confessed is shame, for guit is something as self-reproach, shame is society's blame. That is, you don't feel guilty nor shameful when your pants fall off in private, but you would feel shamefull if they do in public. So the idea of guilt and shame combined together made him confess and give you his solemn word. So my advice, you could find a way to forgive him, and no, at least be affectionate with him, and no sex till marriage. =]

[arreola]

That's entirely possible. I used to do that as well: took a look at escort ads, even call them to ask about their rates, but then stopping the call and never went to one. Yes, in your case (and mine) it seems that is caused by you having neglected him sexually, but in other cases it has nothing to do with that: even guys with a lot of sexual activity with their significant others can cheat, look at p*rn, or having sex with escorts, but they have a different kind of problem

[Anonymous]

The calls were to book them.