My boyfriend doesn't please me in bed :(

don't get me wrong, I very much enjoy having sex with him, so I do feel some sort of ecstasy afterward.

the problem is he doesn't last very long maybe like 5 minutes, he knows I wish he would last longer and we had a fight about if once, not really about the issue but it lead to other problems in the relationship.

i told him he is yet to please me, I know that is a major blow to his ego, but I want to be pleased and I have tried telling him subtly before but he doesn't get it. he is also very tired lately and I think stressed a bit about work and saving for a new car. so he hasn't been into sex much lately.

he doesn't go down on me either, at the very beginning of our relationship I didn't like him going down on me becuase he wasn't very good at it, the thing is I told him but I didn't want him to stop I just wanted him to try something different


Most Helpful Guy

  • Honestly, I can see why he's stopping everything so much and why there are so many fights - your guys' whole relationship is based about negativity.. He's probably wondering when you're gonna quit bitching, and your wondering when you will get the same "attention to detail" that he receives..

    Both of you need to relax and just have fun with it - sex isn't a chore - it's a blast.. pun intended! ;) ;)

    Tips for getting to the magical point:

    1) Stop critizing him and start directing him.. Saying what doesn't work will only shorten the time that he already has to work with.. Tell him what feels great and what you like: "Oh wow it feels great when your ___ is there" then show him and guide his hands / mouth / penis.

    2) Work on the emotions part of it, give him a back massage and otherwise make up for your comment - there's no sense to throw away the relationship just yet. Then after you both have sorted things out - head down to the store and buy some male-enhancement products. I can tell you from personal experience that over time they do help for me, don't know why they wouldn't for him. *caution* - he may take this as another ego strike..

    3) Tell him that you wanna have some fun with him, be all cutsy-flirty and go to the local adult shop to buy a dildo/vibrator.. I recommend the ones for the clit - you'll start gushing ;)


    ~ ArtistBBoy