Bi-sexual girlfriend - what do guys think about that?

What would a guy think if he found out his girlfriend was bi-sexual?


Most Helpful Guy

  • Actually this is my situation. She hasn't told me yet, but she told a mutual friend and it got back to me (first point ladies: tell the guy. and that works the other way around too no doubt)

    my response is not the "Yay! Threesome!" response at all. To make one point: this is not because of homophobia but for the reasons below.

    I'm not worried about guys. I know that if it comes down to another guy and me, It'll be no contest as to winning her over, but with the ladies it's whole new territory. Someone mentioned how now, the WHOLE world is competition. True, and on top of that fact, girls bring something to the table guys can't, and that's a situation where I can't confidently say I'll win out.

    Beyond all that, I'm a little worried now that no matter what I won't be able to fill all her needs and that she'll be more likely to seek girls out on the side (and I'll consider that just as bad as seeking out other guys)

    If any girl is in this situation, you gotta talk it out with your guy. You gotta let him know that he's the only one, no matter what gender, or, if that's not the case, then let him know he's gotta make some decisions on how he sees your relationship. For those girls who have a boyfriend just say "SCORE" I don't know if that's better or worse. At least then you wouldn't have him as upset as I am. Basically, you gotta talk this stuff out.

    • My Girlfriend and I have been dating for a month now, and she told me she was Bi from the start, But I feel the same about it as "DT005" does. kinda creepy really haha.

      but we're only 16. could this just be puberty?

What Guys Said 18

  • He could become insecure, even if it is a turn on. Make it clear that you are committed to him, despite your sexually ambivalent feelings.

  • I would be really turned on knowing that she likes women and would hope for the threesome.

  • Since the overwhelming majority of the women I date are bisexual, it would hardly be a surprise.

  • I'd think "That's why we have so much in common, she likes women too!" I'm not religious and would be cool with what she enjoys. It's weird to me that a guy could think differently, considering guys are so creepily kinky sometimes.

    • I agree but wanted to see what other guys thought

  • There's not a feeling quite like a girl turning you down because she likes another girl, but if it's a girlfriend, it would be related, but still different. Threatening, maybe, because now he has THE ENTIRE HUMAN POPULATION OF THE WORLD as competition. But I guess threesomes could be a resulting fantasy of that, and it depends on the guy, really.

  • It kinda depends on his religion.

    • It really does appear that it may be against some peoples religion to date a bi-sexual female tho I personally see nothing wrong with it

  • It's hard to say, because every guy is different.

    He might like it, seeing as how you are not likely to cheat with another guy.

  • Me and my girlfriend have been together a long time, and I've always had my fantasies about her and another girls(threesomes). It took me a while till she told me she is sort of attracted to that. So, we have our fantasies, and phone sex sometimes about that. But to actually do it! It's kind of hard to take it seriously. Yet in school she tells me that she checks out girls, or that she is attracted to them somehow, but not sexually, according to her. The thing is that I feel mad at that and in the same time it turns me on. I know its my fault, she warned me, but it's just fantasies. It's fun thinking and maybe doing too right, but I know ill jeopardize our relationship. Do you think she is turning bi on me?

    • She could be, however,as a bi female, just know that most bi women prefer one on one relationships and the majority have relationships with men with a rare few dating both, so you have no fears in that regard.

  • When I was younger I was like I can have a threesome but when I got older this kind of relationship is not what it's all cracked up to be it's full of drama and a lot of work. Not only do you have to one day think my relationship could falter from a man but then there is a possibility that a woman can do this also so it's like damn but I'm not saying that you shouldn't trust your partner I did. But its just when you are going through some pains and that one person tries to break something good up. I don't think I could ever date a bi sexual woman again

  • My ex was bi, it didn't bother me until she started trying to see other people (including women) while we were still together. That ended the relationship pretty quick.

  • My girlfriend told me and I'm personally now very incomfortable with her. Not every guy's dream to know his girl likes other gils...

    I only heard about it recently and I'm no longer sure how I feel about the whole deal. If we weren't dating it woud be a complete non-issue but I don't know, it's quite a turn off for me.

  • I for one would be delighted. I have dreamed of having a bi-sexual Girlfriend all my life. To me there is nothing hotter, erotic, or desirable

  • I would tell her I'm bi too..and marry her

  • My girlfriend is bisexual, we are together for 8 years now, and I still do not fully understand what that means. Mostly because (I'm not complaining) she is committed. Right now I'm having my regular "what-if"-crisis. It is hard for us sometimes when it comes to long term plans.

  • My girlfriend and I have been together for a year and a half and she told me that she has been trying to understand her attractions to other girls, I told her that I embrace her sexuality fully but we have come to a consensus that it would be better for us to take a break and give her a chance to experiment these thoughts. I just can't help but feel heart broken, cause I still love her and only want to be with her, but can't help but feel hurt for all we have been through together, is there anyone else who has had this similar experience and have some advice for me?

  • I had a girl cheat on me for several months (I had no clue of course) and the way she did it was pretty immasculating to me. I didn't like that one bit.

    But, then again, I'm a Christian who believes marriage can be a great thing and I've been for long term (one on one) relationships so that shapes my view of things. Similar to what Shanekokayne said, it depends on the faith and belief system he has.

  • He'd either be turned on and hope for a threesome with another girl or get really worried that you'd leave him for a another girl. I had 2 bi girlfriends and one left me for a girl and that hurt, the other got me the threesome and it was awesome. Just let him know and if he leaves you just find someone better.


What Girls Said 5

  • I am bi-sexual but a lot of people misunderstand what that means--it doesn't mean I'd want to have a three way relationship, in fact, I am only physically attracted to women but desire relationships with males. I have had a purely sensual relationship with women but found they are too nuts to date, so I wanted a relationship with a man.

    A bisexual woman is not simply going to want to toss a girl in her relationships--it is more than about sexuality.

    • This is definitely the SICKEST kind of woman I know: the one that is sexually attracted to women yet "wants relationships" with males. She sorts of needs a male only for emotional support. I hope you get kicked in the butt by every male you encounter in your life.

    • What does it mean when a bisexual girl is only attracted to women but desire relationships with guys? I agree with tames that those girls are very confusing because you as a man you want to feel attracted by your female partner. Does include the desire for a relationship the physical attraction? Because if it's not that way, sucks

    • 3mo

      It kinda sounds like you like to have a man for security while you play with women for fun.

  • when I told my ex that I thought I might be bi-sexual then he dumped me but my new boyfriend respects me for who I am and probably hopes that he can watch me hook up with a girl but watever haha.

  • Okay so I am bi so I can straight out say that some guys are cool with it and others aren't. Some can't stand it and wanna fight and argue because you like girls. And there are guys that think it means they can mess around with girls because you are. And then there are guys who just couldn't care less if you do or not.

  • Okay I'm a girl and bi and I've had my boyfriend for about a year now. All along he's known that I'm bisexual and yeah we've had phone sex and what not with fantasy of doing it with another girl - threesome and yeah obviously that's hot I find it a turn on and that's cool fine whatever.

    THEN last night he asked me if I found this movie star hot and asked if I'd do him - it obviously felt like a trap so I was weary to reply an when I hesitated he said youve already answered so I said yeah I'd do him. He then went in a huff for the rest of the night cancelled our plans and ditched me in his mood. Now he won't answer my calls or texts and I'm just waiting for him to talk but before when this happened he tried to argue it wasn't fair that I could say that about guys because apparently he can say it about girls and I'll just agree so it's UNFAIR that I can say it Bout both sexes.

    Somebody tell me what the hell and how am I meant to reason with that!?

    When he says oh she's hot in passing about a girl I can't see when were on the phone it bothers me as much as saying he's hot bothers him but because I'm bi I find all girls hot and the same logic of comparing myself to other woman don't apply apparently. I'm not gonna stop looking at men because he has an issue so this needs to get sorted - any ideas?

  • As a Lesbian women i see this so often from another side. I have had one night stands and short term flings with Bisexual women. Some, their partners have no idea they have sex with women and have stated to me they would never accept their male partners having other women.

    Other women who's male partners have known they are Bi have said they do not tell him about most of their female sexual partners and keep it limited to their knowledge. Some of them have had 3sums with their men but prefer alone time with women and they also said they would not accept their men having women on the side.

    So many women have said they love their man but i don't understand if you love him so much why not tell him about all the female contacts you have, why not let him be with other women?

    I'm afraid so many people want their cake and to eat it too.