Sexual Health
+1 y

Being curvy is not all that....

This goes out to all girls who feel like they wish they had curvy shapes. Whether its hips, butt, or boobs that you don't have much of, trust me, there are cons to everything. Today I was at the farmers market getting some food after my workout. So I'm wearing a clingy spandex jacket and yoga pants. Its cold out, but after working out I'm pretty heated and the farmers market is only a subway stop away from my place. A man literally walked up behind me, reached between my legs and grabbed my ass and whistled. I felt so humiliated, so embarrassed I thought I was going to cry. It's not the first time this kind of thing has happened, but they usually don't put their hands on me unless I'm at a club or party. Still, it makes me want to cry every single time. It's still degrading every time. I look at my friends who have more rectangle type shapes, where they are more petite and pencil shaped, and they get attention from guys but its always "you're cute" type of attention and they want to get to know them. Guys are interested in me sometimes, but usually its all about sex. I don't mind that sometimes, but damn it's all the time and I get sick of it. I start resenting men and not wanting anything to do with them because I almost never get the attention that I want. I always get men only wanting to get me naked or grope me. I love my body, but sometimes I do think things would be easier if I had the boyish type of body. There's not much versatility in styles either. I find skinny girls can be cute, artsy, elegant, and other looks. When I try those same looks I look provocative, slutty, etc. Sometimes buying jeans is a bitch too. Anyway I'm not going to go on with this too long. I have wide hips, smaller waist, a round butt, and big boobs and sometimes it sucks so much. I think men respect women who aren't curvy much more than they respect us. They see us as sex objects. I've even heard one guy say, "skinny girls are the ones you date and marry, curvy girls are the ones you f***." Some guys don't like curvy girls, I know, but a lot of them like the way we look and they take it to a gross level. I don't know I just feel violated. Some girls complain because they don't get enough male attention or they don't feel sexy. I get too much sexual male attention and they don't even see me as a person half of the time, they just try to get into my pants. People suck. So the next time you look in the mirror at your skinny figure, just think, "wow today some guy is going to be looking at my face instead of my boobs. today's gonna be a good day." I wish I could say the same. :(
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Most Helpful Girls

  • WOW I totally feel for you hun! I have the exact same problem ihave it happen to me all the time at my college.just last week a guy grabbed my butt and I turned around on him and pinned him up against the wall and chewed him out but I agree its humiliatioin but how I got passed it is I relized that when I was younger I always wanted this body and I recieved it and its part of our genes how I go about every day is I wear cloths that make me look good and feel good I act the person I am and I've learned to challenge my thoughts on wanting to be other girls but I know I don't want to be them because I am who I am and I hate it some times but I've come to relize its a gift to be shaped like this because its a beautiful look just think bout what your passions are and what you want to do with youlife and go from there forget about the jerks who try to do that stuff they don't matter the ones who matter are the ones who will stick up for you and then stay with you! I COMPLETELY UNDERSTAND HOW YOU FEEL ITS FRUSTRATIING BUT YOUR BETTER THEN THAT AND YOU CAN GET THROUGH IT AND ALWO YOUA GREAT PERSON TOO. TAKE CARE GIRLY!

  • Ok,it's rantings like this that make me want to slap a bitch.

    ONLY because(No,i'm not jealous,I'm an hourglass figure) but everything you're saying,means sh*t to girls who wish they had curves because they could sit here and write a whole thing like this to us(you and me and every other curvy girl out there).

    Yes,I agree with you,it's hard.I have had guys grab my ass too or slap my ass and stare straight at my boobs like I'm headless and it is disrespectful and yes,I rather be rectangle/pencil shape,but that's life.I remember when I was 8/9 and first started developing breasts,I was the curvy,had boobs and there were literally 30 year old guys out there whistling and trying to hit on me and that's not fun when you're 9.

    But at the end of the day,girls who have different body shapes will gripe and complain and say one is better than the other.

    • LOL at slap a bitch. I like my curves too, but I certainly am not going to complain about them. Better than being a twig.

    • eww seriously? 30 year olds were whistling at you... I hope to God you at least looked old enough. that sh*ts disturbin

    • Well I get told I look young now so maybe body wise but face wise I doubt it.It was just weird.I remember when I was at Tom Thumb this guy followed me around until I went to my mom and stood with her and guys would try to talk to me.ugh

    • Show All

  • That's really disgusting. But yeah, I get what you mean. No one has ever put a hand on me, but the other day my sister and I were walking home from school and I was wearing a sweater dress, black leggings and snow boots with a jacket. Some black guy unloading a truck went as far to yell "Mmmmmmm, that's what I'm talking about hunny" when I walked by. It's embarrassing and disgusting. Luckily, I only have hips and an ass. Can't imagine how it'd be to have t*ts to boot.

    • omg I get comments like that too. you feel like a piece of meat on display. its like at least try to keep it to yourself perve so you don't ruin my day. I've shouted back at guys before and they seem to get turned off then so that's good. men.

Most Helpful Guys

  • Guys that grope or otherwise sexually harass women like this deserve to be kicked in the face. Multiple times. With a golf shoe.

    That said, your personal experiences aside, I doubt your curvy figure is to blame for this. I think you're making connections that just aren't there. Sadly, I don't doubt that any sexually attractive woman, curvy or not, has to put up with this sh*t. Yes I know know one guy told you "skinny girls are the ones you date and marry, curvy girls are the ones you f***" but guys say a lot of things. It doesn't apply to all mankind just cause one guy says it does. Helpful tip, any time a guy makes a broad, sweeping generalization like that you're safe to assume he's an idiot.

    I know you're hurt and angry and, honestly, I don't blame you for it but I have to object to your claim that men only view you as a sex object. I'm sure you've passed by many, many men in your day to day life who viewed you respectfully as human being and thus said nothing. Unfortunately it only takes one asshole to ruin the reputation of all the good men, it seems.

  • I think its a matter of be pleased with what you're given. Whether you're curvy or not. For you, you should have punched that dude square in the face and called him out. Make a scene and humiliate the sh*t outa him; however, those with curves should be grateful, they have a nice body and its a matter of just accepting it. Taking charge of your body and owning it, but letting know that others' don't have access to do with you what they want... because the truth of the matter is, you might not have all the curves, but if you have a cute face or even a great personality, can be enough for a guy to hit on a girl without the girl desiring such actions to take place, and even then, a woman needs to step up for herself. Either way, curves, no curves, appreciate yourself, don't judge and stereotype yourselves, just be who you are.

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What Girls & Guys Said

3 8

  • I have an hour glass shape but I have no butt and my bra size is a size b cup and no guys ever notice me.

  • I'm sorry that your life is so full of *ssholes. Your body isn't responsible for this; they'd be *ssholes no matter what shape you are.

    Worse still, they're *ssholes to the boyish rectangles, too. (BTW, might not want to re-use that wording, okay?) I promise you: the guy who said he'll marry one while f*cking the other will do EXACTLY that.

    Ideally, all women, of all shapes, should be desired as people *and* as sex objects. But it's really hard to convince people of this. Strangely, it's really hard to convice *women* of this.

    Maybe we'll change things, us two.

  • I'll bet you anything there are guys who are looking at you as a human and not for your body. They just might be shy or intimidated by you :\ sadly, the assholes are the ones who are more likely to make their interest known and their interest is always shallow.

    Try getting to know a guy who is shy or something in a class/work whatever and see if there's any connection and how they treat you :P might find we're not all bad.

    And don't be embarrassed or ashamed or anything of anything a guy doing that. Be mad, very mad. I'd probably have hit the guy if I was there and saw it. I can't stand guys who are so.. dishonorable and disgusting. Be proud of your body (as you seem to be) and be flattered you're so hot guys are willing to risk basically an ass kicking or whatever just to do whatever. Though, it doesn't excuse their despicable action. Shoulda turned around, gave him the swiftest, hardest kick in the nuts that hopefully would shatter them.

  • You should have had that asshole arrested. Or kicked him in the balls.

  • Well okay then. Is it just me or is she just whining about having curves because it gets her A lot of attention and at the same time gets attention from this post from people telling here she should love herself and her body? Haa alrighty then.

    • thats cute and clever, but no. I'm serious about this. its a grass always seems greener on the other side thing. I'm just trying to show how life isn't all grand when you have an hourglass shape. in this world, it can suck ass. thank you, come again.

    • Haha yeah. You didn't have to tell me about his one. I already knew, like most people with common sense do to. Kay thanks bye (:

  • Curves don't have anything to do with that happening to you. It could happen to any girl a guy finds attractive. Sorry to hear that happens to you. It's not deserved. Your pants don't say "grab me" on them.

  • Please don't be offended, I think you need to look at this from a different approach. I think anyone that has respect for others would hold off on the whole randomly grabbing other people, even at clubs, and particularly at a farmers market of all places. There are inconsiderate people all around you, and I hope next time this guy gets his justice. For the record, I doubt you'd get charged with assault if you slapped this guy, and I'm sure he'd feel like an idiot if you yelled at him in a crowded area. I hope you are again soon able see your curves as an asset not a detriment!

  • First of all, I am so sorry to hear that this happened to you. It was not your fault but his. It sounds like you've been very much hurt by this. please know that there's no shame in finding a therapist to help you through the pain. You deserve to heal and find people who respect you.

  • what are you asking?

    What am I supposed to apologize for the male gender now because you have a sexy body and some men with no class harassed you?

    do some exercise besides yoga and you may not be so "curvy" anymore.

  • f*** the face body is where its at. If the girl has an ugly face you can always bag her.

  • don't pout about it, turn around and punch that mother f***er in the faace and ask him how he would like it if someone did that to their mom

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