GF doesn't know how to ride on top during sex, it's very awkward. What do I do?

So I'm always on top, because she doesn't know the motions of being on top and riding me. She jus keeps moving back and forth instead of going up and down. I've tried giving her direction but she doesn't get it and she knows she doesn't. What do I do, cause I'm getting tired.
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Most Helpful Girls

  • I think sometimes it is harder for girls to be on top than it is for guys. Also, different (and easier) motions like grinding instead of bouncing up and down can feel great for girls but don't stimulate the guy as well. Some girls also feel uncomfortable being on top because they feel exposed, pressured, or self conscious. Try to be understanding and patient, as criticizing or nagging her will only make things worse. It took me many tries and a lot of help (and encouragement) from my boyfriend before I felt comfortable on top. Different positions work better than others as well. Traditional cowgirl makes me a bit insecure and also doesn't feel as good as some other positions for me, so one thing that works is I kneel, straddling him, and then tuck me knees forward and lean down so my torso is near his. Then I bounce my hips. It's easier for me in a lot of ways. I also like a position where he sits in a chair and I straddle him, facing him. I put my feet on the rungs of the chair and bounce up and down.

    Those are the only poses I have ever been successful with. Experiment with your girlfriend to find what works for you two. And don't forget that body image can play a role whether or not a girl feels good on top, so compliment and admire her. If you help out by thrusting slightly too or using your hands, that can also take some of the pressure off her and make her feel more comfortable (plus it'll feel better to her!).

    • P.S. The reason why I scoot forward on my knees (bringing my knees closer to his armpits) in the first position I described is because when I don't, his penis goes too deep inside me which is painful to me. If that doesn't tend to hurt your girlfriend the whole sliding thing might not be necessary. (Just in case you were to try that position, I thought I'd clarify that.)

  • Maybe try it slightly differently to start with.

    Being on top is a very ... open position for girls. Guys can see everything and it can make even the most confident girl feel self conscious, especially if she doesn't know exactly what she's doing.

    Instead of lying down, perhaps try it so you're sitting up, on the couch, or against the back board of the bed or something, and have her straddle your lap.

    This way there's still a closeness between you, she's not as exposed, so there's one less thing to worry about, and it's easier to move from the knees than from a crouched position - I don't know how you were trying it before.

    Also - in this position, moving back and forth should also have a similar effect of her going up and down, so she can switch between the two before she better gets the hang of it. And hey - a little variety is always good.

    Also placing your hands on her hips and gently, physically, guiding her can be a huge help - plus she has you for support. Maybe she just feels a little daunted by the prospect of doing all the work, so let her know you're there to help in simple ways like that.

  • It's a lot harder then it looks. She's no p*rn star, this stuff takes years of practice. Be a little more patient. Don't show her p*rn like that guy down there said, personally if my guy did that and told me to "Do. It. Like. That." I wouldn't only get offended, but I'd probably dump you for two reasons:

    1) I know what it looks like, everyone does. She's not retarded.

    2) That doesn't help. Seeing it isn't going to magically give me the years of d*** hopping that chick probably has.

    Go slow, guide her, sit up and help lift her butt up. It's a muscle we don't use often, no matter how fit. Suggest that she do it on her feet with her knees up, that's a lot easier... a lot more awkward for her at first, but its tons easier.

Most Helpful Guys

  • Do it in a chair; the reason why is that if she sits on your lap with her back to you going back and forth is not as easy as moving up and down; the latter comes more naturally.

    • she couldn't even do it right in a chair...don't know what direction to give after the 4th time trying

    • Clearly you need visual aids. Go get some p*rn that matches the technique and say "Do. It. Like. That." She'll be offended but I guarantee she'll never do it wrong again. Ever. And that's with anyone in her life even beyond you.

    • This might just be my own opinion, but if a guy tried that with me, I would never do it wrong again... because I would never do it again, period. Offending me is not a good way to get me to do what you want.

    • Show All
  • Let her do it the way that feels best and makes her cum. After that turn that bitch around and pound that ass until it hurts. Finish with some back shots. Skeet skeet Bitches.

    • Fucking beautiful lol

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What Girls & Guys Said

2 1
  • Definitely communicate it...I don't mind a guy.directing me to what he likes. Hasn't happened often, but a couple times I asked...

  • She might like the grinding motions more. What doesn't she get about going up and down?

  • Is this really a big deal? I think you need to be a bit more patient.

    A LOT of girls have trouble with this position and being on top, it just isn't the most easiest to bounce up and down, rather then just grind back and forth. I'm sure you can find other positions that you will both enjoy a lot more.. appreciate that she's having sex with you and trying hard to please you.