Is this considered sexual assault even if he didn't rape me?

[Anonymous]

last night I was on a date with a guy I had met through a friend about 2 weeks ago. we went to a nice restaurant and the date went really well, he seemed sweet, funny, and like and all out nice guy. But, once we got to the car his demeanor changed. while in the parking lot he took my arm and placed it over his pants on his d*** and with his other hand grabbed my breast and leaned in to kiss me. I hesitated and pulled away and said I didn't think this was a good idea and that I don't usually move so fast. I explained that I had a great time on our date but as I previously stated I wanted to move slower. he didn't listen and told me that it would be fun. I pushed him a way and told him to please take me home, still, my commands went unheeded. at this point I went to open the door to get out but the door wouldn't open the first time I tried so I figured it was locked. so I went to pull up the lock on the door only to realize that there wasn't one. when he saw this he started laughing and groping and kissing me. I pushed him away and started screaming as loud as I could. at this point he punched me and my head hit the side window and it cracked and cut my forehead. and he rolled over from the driver seat so that he was on top of me on the passenger seat and ht pulled th leer to lean it back. I was still trying my hardest to get him off of me.he told me that he would take me home if I 'did a little something for him first'. that was when he pulled out that knife. it wasn't a big knife just a pocket knife but he used it to cut off my panties and he told me just to relax and that I would enjoy it. I was crying and screaming. I don't know how but I managed to hit him so hard with the palm of m,y hand on this nose ( a self defense technique taught to me by a close guy friend ) and I think it broke his nose. while he was writhing in pain I pushed him forward and rolled over to the driver seat and got out and ran. I ended up running in to a guy friend of mine who was with someone his friends at bar next door. he called the cops and I filed a report and took care of me and I went to the hospital and got stitches on my head where it was lacerated. and I went back to his apartment because I didn't want to be alone. I'm not sure if the police have arrested the man yet or not. at any rate, it was rape, but what would this be considered and how do I get over feeling so horrible about it :/

[elements]

Yes, that is sexual assault. Sexual assault is a general term, and rape is something that falls under that. And then both sexual assault, rape, as well as verbal harassment (that is of a sexual nature) fall under sexual harassment. If he is caught and arrested, he'll probably be charged with sexual assault.

You did everything right in this situation. I'm sorry that it happened to you, but it was incredibly brave of you to go to the police after it happened. A lot of people don't, unfortunately.

I don't think you'll ever "get over" feeling so horrible, but it is possible to learn from an experience like this and lead a happy, productive life. I really encourage you to go to a sexual assault/rape crisis centre if there is one near you -- they have counselors there that are trained to help people that have gone through experiences like these. Therapy will help immensely, as well as having the support of those you love (and it seems that you do, which is fantastic).

Just remember that it wasn't your fault, and that you can move on from this experience and be happy.

If you ever need to talk or simply vent, feel free to send me a message. Best of luck and I hope that bastard gets charged and convicted.

[fooobar]

You did nothing wrong. You didn't "lead him on" or do anything that deserved that. The guy is an animal that will continue to do this to other women whenever the opportunity arises.

I'm really glad you had the presence of self to get the police involved and your friend is a good one. See this through; you're in control, not that asshole.

[MidSummerNightDream]

If you went on a date with him, surely you have his name and maybe even contact info? Include that in your police report if you haven't already. Like the others said, sexual assault is not rape, but that's still a horrible and illegal thing for him to do.

[johnireland02]

It's attempted rape and hopefully they will catch him. Make sure you tell that friend who set you up with this creep what this guy is really like. He needs to be punished.

Good that you got out OK. It could have easily been worse.

[udolipixie]

He'll be arrested but most likely will get off.

To get rid of that horrible feeling begin seeing strange guys as threats & learn some serious self defense.

[dragonxlli]

If it made you feel uncomfortable, it's sexual harassment. Period.

[queenofpeen]

That's sexual assault and attempted rape :(

I'm so sorry that this happened to you... I hope he gets what he deserves.

[elizabeth24]

its sexual assault none the less yes he will be arrested for attempted rape

[queenofpeen]

Are you trolling or serious? He beat her up and tried to rape her. I'd really like to see you come up with ONE example of how she led him on. Even if she did, that doesn't make it okay to do what he did to her when she clearly didn't want to.

[kmhco]

Rape=/=sexual assault. He did sexually assault you and he could even get charged with attempted rape (which he probably will). You probably won't get over it. At least not for a while. That was a pretty traumatic experience and it is possible you may need therapy to work though it. For the time being just be around close friends and family and eat lots of ice cream or whatever comfort foods work for you.

[queenofpeen]

Seeking therapy for something traumatizing doesn't make you weak.

[webboy]

its scum bags like that that make us all look bad