Is my boyfriend into s&m? Or does he think it's me?!

[Anonymous]

My boyfriend enjoys spanking me during sex, he's asked me before if I liked it and I said yeah, kind of... and he's asked if it hurt and I said no not really. so he's started doing it harder and it does hurt sometimes. and when we cook in the kitchen sometimes, he's started taking a wooden spoon or spatula and spanking me with it lol it's a joke but is he hinting it? also he's started holding my hands together above my head and not letting go, pulling my hair, and one time he took my styling brush and started rubbing it on my ass which was a bit weird. I'm not really into the whole thing, but is this just normal sex or is it verging on s&m? thing is,i'm worried it's possible I gave him the wrong idea that I like it, so he's doing it for my benefit, supposedly. I had this thing about wanting a lovebite which is immature I know (this might not be relevant but I was 18, now 19, and he's 26), but I used to ask him to bite my neck... I kind of liked it anyway during sex and I thought the idea was kind of hot, but I saw some pictures of me afterward and it just looked awful. I was secretly proud of it a year ago but now I look back in embarassment at it.. lol. apart from that I don't think I've ever shown him much interest in that kind of thing. do you think he actually likes it or is he trying to do something for me? cos it's not working lol...

[kheserthorpe]

Its not a joke, it turns him on.

Look speak up. S&M is not a yes or no thing, there are lots of things, some things may turn you on, others may turn you off, you really need to communicate. A light slap may upset you when a much more painful bite turns you on.

Talk talk talk! Figure out what you both like or both want to try.

[Anonymous]

Spanking and holding your hands together is not the same as S&M. If you don't like something then simply ask him to stop or not do it anymore. Communication is the key to every strong relationship.

[NessielaKee]

Yeah, he's into s&m. But if he's doing it too hard you have to tell him. He doesn't have to stop but tell him your limit, if he's a good Dom, he'll understand. I think light s&m is fun but the really hardcore stuff is only for those that are really into it, and most people aren't.

[Anonymous]

My boyfriends a lor like this. From my experience, he does it because he thinks it's hot. If you don't like something in particular that he does, tell him about it!

[italykam]

Hmm I would say it is possible that it is starting to lead to it but it's not bad haha.

[Xx_DRE_xX]

It could be bothways but you should definately talk to him about it.