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It's so pathetic how guys think sex is the most important thing!

There is much more to dating and relationships then sexual acts! It's so pathetic how guys say they will dump a girl if she's not up to his standards... Show More

Most Helpful Opinion

  • As long as you don't want monogamy, then you do what you both enjoy together and don't worry about it.If you want him to have sex with ONLY you and not anyone else, then you need to be prepared to meet the bulk of his sexual desires. That IS the point of a monogamous relationship.You can't just say ' its about love and connectedness, and oh I don't want him sleeping with anyone else because I'd be jealous but I don't want to do anything gross just because he deeply craves it but don't do it with any other sluts or I'll be angry.'People's sexual desires are part of who they are. If you don't want to embrace them, don't have a monogamous relationship with them.

    • "then you need to be prepared to meet the bulk of his sexual desires. That IS the point of a monogamous relationship." isn't the point of a relationship to share a life with that person and love them? and look after them? not be his sex doll.

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    • its a deal breaker for you if she says no to anal? wow good luck finding someone who will say yes to that. it's so selfish of you to even ask for it. I hate what p*rn has done to guys, they think they can just copy everything they see.

    • It will be if I get divorced, at least for a relationship vs. FWB.I've lived years without sex before. I'd rather be single then stuck in a relationship where my needs aren't met. I don't need a woman. I want one who wants to please me and who I can please (not just in bed, but in bed as well).

What Guys Said 13

  • So it's selfish and shallow to dump a girl over anal, or blow jobs? What if, instead, I demanded blow jobs or demanded anal? Would she be selfish and shallow for dumping me over being demanding?We all get to choose our own deal breakers; I don't choose for you, you don't choose for me. If blowjobs are a deal breaker for me, your choices are to go down or go away. It has nothing to do with selfish or shallow, and everything to do with my right to choose which relationships I will or will not be in. If roles were reversed, you would insist on the same respect from me.

    • I just don't understand why a sexual act can be a deal breaker? it's only sex! other things in life are much more important. I mean sex isn't even going to last forever, you'll get too old one day. Better to find a person your compatible with emotionally & personality wise then to find someone for sex. Relationships aren't about having a sex buddy.

    • To repeat: "We all get to choose our own deal breakers." ANYTHING can be a deal breaker--your clothes, your ethnicity, your taste in music, your choice in friends. So why not sex acts?

  • Guys know what they want, and what's important to them.Most of them have no difficulty finding girls who share the same values.Just because you feel differently, doesn't automatically mean you're right.

    • so guys get into relationships just for sex? that's sad.

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    • Your question made some blanket statements, and then asked why.I challenged your blanket statements, saying that they may not be right.The vast majority of people can find a partner that shares their values. Whether it's humour, kids, intelligence, politics, religion, sex, music, or whatever. Just because you feel differently, doesn't automatically mean you're right.Never mind. You can make all the assumptions you want. Your answer to me proved that just nicely.

    • im talking about guys who dump their girlfriend based on a sexual act. I think it's shallow & selfish.

  • and it's so shallow that women won't date men they are not attracted to? Everyone has their preferences. Who am I to tell someone else what their preferences should be? If you don't like their preferences then move and find someone's you do like. That's what I would do.

  • Apparently, you haven't met too many of us male pandas

  • So it's wrong for a guy to have standards?Heterosexual guys will only date women. OH MY GOD THAT'S SO SELFISH AND SHALLOW THERE'S SO MUCH MORE TO DATING AND RELATIONSHIPS THAN SEX?If the above sounds incredibly retarded to you, that's about what you sound like to me.

    • yeah but things like anal sex and wanting to have unprotected sex? and demanding blowjobs and then dumping the girl because she doesn't want to. that's just being selfish & only thinking with his d*** in my opinion.

    • If you're not okay with those things you are free to find yourself another boyfriend who is less demanding in that area. I hear SnackG link would be okay with just hugging, you're free to date him. Or perhaps sadface link , I hear he's *very* single and probably desperate enough to accept every condition you can think of.Or do these guys not meet your standards? How shallow :p

  • No not all guys are like that! What you described are total jerks.

  • its GENETIC,can't help!you girls have your five days in the month when you are extremely hornythink of a guy going through that every single day of his life

    • as far as your question goes...he might be getting a lot more from other girls...if you are not comfortable...don't bother move on

  • I love sex and won't stay with a girl who doesn't satisfy my sexual needs. Same thing if she doesn't meet my intellectual or emotional needs. It's not just about sex, but sex is a very important part of a relationship to me. And it goes both ways, I also strive on satisfying all her needs.

    • you won't stay with her even if she's compatible in every other way? that is stupid. because you won't be having sex forever anyway.

    • It may be stupid to you, not to me. I need to be satisfied sexually to be happy. May be you don't, good for you, one less thing you have to worry about. Just pick something that us of prime importance to you, let say emotional fulfillment. Now, accept that I feel the exact same but about sex as well. Pretty simple if you accept other people can be different than you. Can you do that?

  • The same could be said but in reverse... "It's so pathetic how girls thing that sex isn't the most important thing." Because if you look at it from an evolutionary point of view, sex is really the most fundamental and important thing. Procreation of our species is THE most important thing.

    • Well perhaps, but for procreation blowjobs and anal are pretty irrelevant, and these were amongst the things QA mentioned. :p

    • *shhhhhhhh* don't point that out. lol

  • There are a couple of things sexually that are very important to me...I have been married for 16 years..."giving my female oral" is one of these and I have quit seeing females because they would not let me go down on them. Why would I want to marry someone and give up my favorite sexual activities for the rest of my life?

    • because relationships are more then just having a sex partner.

    • Yes they are but the sex is important too and I would not marry a female who could not, or would not, take care of my sexual needs...

    • Just because they are _more_ then having a sex partner does not mean they are _less_ then that.Sex is one of the critical things, just because its not the ONLY one doesn't mean its not a deal breaker.

  • Think you are making bold statements that are just untrue. Maybe from YOUR experience, guys are like that but not everyone is. Sex is just a part of a relationship, it's not the be all and end all of it. I guess in your experience the guys have just been immature. If the guy is mature then it's not just about sex.

  • no not all of us want that I'm sorry you hav had a bad sampling of men but that doesn't mean you can just generalise all of us as people who want sex and nothing more

What Girls Said 6

  • Sex isn't the only important thing in relationships, but it is important. Guys are just more vocal about it, whereas women will settle into a sexually unsatisfying relationship. I think guys are on the smart end of this one. The important thing to remember though, is that YOU are allowed to have sexual demands as well. So if waiting is important to you, and using condoms are important to you, then find a guy who agrees with those things. What the guy wants is not the end all and be all, they're just his own preferences. You need to find someone sexually compatible with you, and then you will love sex and see it as important in a relationship as well.

  • no but it is a defining feature of a relationship vs a friendship. Not all guys are like that though but you should find someone with similar view on sex to you. As a girl I couldn't see a guy for too long who had no willingness to engage in oral at all. especially if there was no wilingness to hear me out .

  • Sex is important to both girls and guys but if a guy wants to dump a girl because she wants him to condoms he's a jerk and probably has some sort of STD!

  • Sex creates another level of intimacy, in a physical sense.You connect emotionally through words and mutual feelings and connect physically through sex.Sex IS important to some and like emotional/mental compatibility, sexual compatibility is just as important.I would dump a guy if we weren't sexually compatible. I have a high sex drive, I'm horny virtually every time of the day and I would want someone who I could communicate with openly and have both physical and sexual chemistry with.Initially in a relationship I would make the guy wear a condom. I trust no one. I would require he get tested(I'm a virgin but I'll do it to be fair), and to use a condom until marriage or until I am sure we are in a completely 100% monogamous relationship.I don't expect to receive oral sex and I don't want to, however, I DO expect to give it. A sex life without oral and foreplay is incomplete and boring.I personally love anal stimulation and I'd be up for giving a guy a prostate massage.If one partner needs oral sex to orgasm or get prepared for sex, it is selfish to deprive them of it.Anal sex is subjective.But it all comes down to compatibility.Sex may not be important to you, and that's fine, however, it is important to other people and is individualYou've posted about 10 of these rants already. Shut up and find someone else who is asexual

  • Believe me, I have met guys who think sex should have a meaning not just "DANG DANG DANG" as a guy once told me. But thing is, they're rare to find compared to the guys you are describing here.

  • okay first off, not all guys are like that. one of the most pathetic things about the "why are men/women like this or that" crew is that you people generally focus on specific types of men and women, the ones you want most for whatever reason in relationships. there are tons of guys out there who don't think sex is the most important thing or important at all. there are also lots of virgin guys out there, there are the guys you pass by without giving a second thought, the guys who feel invisible, etc. same with girls. so start looking for different types of guys that suit you better. voila. secondly, that's not just guys. some girls are like that too, I know I am. bad sex life is one of the worst things to have in a relationship unless both people have low libido, aer reallt stressed, or too busy, etc. to want sex a lot and don't reallly care about sex. its what leads to years of lying and cheating. I've been the other woman several times, and usually guys stray because of sex. would you rather that happen or would you rather them leave you so you can find someone more compatible? id always prefer the latter and so that's how I treat the people I date. id never cheat on anyone personally, id rather just be bluntly honest with you and let you know its gnot going to work. I'm a very sexual person and I know what I want, which is more than I can say for a lot of people. compromise is cool, but unless I really, really like someone, like I'm head over heels into them, it isn't worth being sexually frustrated to stay with them. and that's it in a nutshell: they don't like you enough to settle on what they can get sexually from other girls. its really that simple. think of it this way...even if they don't like you enough tto stay, on some level they respect you enough not to tell you that everythings okay and then go cheat behind your back. accept that and start looking for guys who are better matches for you.

    • sorry for the typos lol

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