Is anyone else bothered with this whole "face f***ing" thing?

[Anonymous]

Seriously, I'm seeing more and more p*rn vids of guys brutally choking out girls on their d***s to the point that it looks like they might die. Then I hear guys always saying this is a turn on, and they want to do this to their girlfriend, or they have done it to their girlfriends, etc.. And I've heard girls actually saying that their boyfriends pushed their head down and gag them hold their head down and pinch their nose and all that crap, and even heard some say their guy actually wants to make them puke!? Why? What is the appeal, just being cruel? I can't image these guys would like it so much if the same were done to them. To me it's just a form of abuse that guys have duped girls into accepting, and they know it. I keep hearing girls say they hate it but they want to do it just to turn their guy on. Am I'm thinking "why?" Why would you let him treat you like that because he saw it in a p*rn video? I've heard yes that "some girls like it", but -most- of the time I hear them say it's to turn on their guy not themselves. Some girls stoop too low to appease guys... or maybe they feel like they need to compare to p*rn. I don't know. I don't know what's wrong with my generation. Sometimes I LOATHE p*rn and wish it didn't exist.

[Anonymous]

Some guys have a masochistic streak. (Heard of "S&M"?)

Others don't. (Thank goodness.)

You clearly don't.

Yes, women will go the extra mile (um, or centimeters) to please their guy. It's what we tend to do till one day we're fed up of giving and receiving nothing in return for our efforts (NOTE: This last applies only to those of us who specifically DO give our guy everything and receive nothing -- or perhaps a cheating player... Ugh...).

It's not about competing with p*rn, but the fear that they're not enough, that their guy seems unsatisfied unless he gets everything he wants, that sense of insecurity that he'll move on and leave the girl in the dust, crying her heart out even though she "did everything right" -- there IS no "right"/"wrong" with certain guys (e.g., the ones who like S&M). Watching the girl cry and fall apart is part of the appeal. Watching the girl try to imitate the p*rn star and worry about falling short is part of the appeal for the S&M-oriented guy. It's not something that you might understand at this point, nor is it something you really need to understand in order to have a full and healthy relationship...

Just be happy with a gal who is suitable for you. :-)

[Asker]

But I think most of these guys wouldn't have the urge to brutally force deep throat on a girl had it not been for them seeing it done in p*rn! I think too many young guys nowadays just think whatever they see in p*rn is okay to do.

[Opinion Owner]

The girls wouldn't watch that sort of thing if they didn't think it was what their guy wanted from them. (While I understand that not every guy has a "porn box" or "little black book," it IS, in fact, the perceived norm, which is why girls try to understand such things in anticipation of what they think their future bf/hubbies will expect from them. It in an accurate assumption? We'd have to add a GAG poll to your question, lol.)

[Asker]

I didn't think girls watched it. I feel sorry for any girl who thinks she needs to emulate what's in p*rn to satisfy a guy. But I'm saying this stuff is made for guys and to give them the idea to do it and had it not been for THAT we probably wouldn't be having this conversation because guys wouldn't want to be choking girls on their d***.

[Opinion Owner]

I would HOPE not! I know a girl whose husband made her watch p*rn on their honeymoon because she was a virgin. He wanted to show her...what he expected. With no other solid guidelines to work with, she just did her best to emulate. A few weeks afterward, she asked me if my ex had put me through the same ordeal and thankfully I was able to say that he hadn't. I couldn't quite imagine what that would have been like.

[Anonymous]

I think it's just a sadistic power trip, whether they admit it or not. Why else would you get off by choking your girl? I don't see how gagging and hacking and coughing sh*t up, can possibly be a turn on, especially if they really see the physical effect that is has on the girl. I personally think if you can get off on that, it's like getting off on watching rape. it's practically the same thing. it's a violent sexual act. I'd be very surprised if any woman actually enjoyed it (that wasn't into s/m)

now, my guy has held onto my head and pushed a little (very little), but only as a guide, not as a violent act. I can absolutely understand that. but he'd pull back if he felt it was too much. I can't imagine him ever getting off on watching me being violently choked.

it's a mystery to me. and I agree, if they had something forced down their throat, I think they'd change their mind pretty damn quick. ;)

[Asker]

I'm sure it's about sadistic power trip. I think it's apparent when the p*rn brags on how much it made the girl gag, or how "brutal" it was. I guess it's like rape or torture. No one in a healthy mental state could "enjoy" being treated that way. Worries me guys taking this crap from p*rn and even more girls just putting up with it and made to feel like it's something they should do. esp after reading a frickin 15 year old saying her boyfriend has her do it, that's sad.

[Opinion Owner]

oy, 15 is just way to young to be experimenting with that kinda sadism. sigh. I just wish everyone would treat their partner respectfully, though I know that's asking too much these days.

[jacquesvol]

I'm afraid you're right... :-(

[cun7n1nja]

I like it on occasion. But I also like being choked during sex, slapped, talked down to, tossed around, biting, being tied up/restrained, dominated, anal, etc. My boyfriend and I are into that kind of thing. That doesn't mean we don't have romantic, loving sex too, because we do. But when the mood is right, the taboo factor of any of those things make them a huge turn on. I don't just do it for him, I do it because I like it too and we're very compatible sexually.

[Asker]

I just often times wish p*rn weren't around to drill into people's psyche what a turn-on is, and rather just use what comes naturally to decide that is all.

[cun7n1nja]

That is what I like naturally. Not always, but sometimes. I have a wide variety of sexual interests, most of which I didn't learn from p*rn. I like the p*rn because it appeals to what I already like. Different kinds of p*rn wouldn't exist if there weren't an audience for it, and there's nothing wrong with picking up new ideas from p*rn. That just means it appeals to something that was already there.

[l-hedoniste]

Consent, consent, consent, consent, consent.

I'm not into the choking thing, at all. BUT, if he's into throatf*cking a girl until she gags, and she's into getting throatf*cked until she gags, then their arrangement is none of my business, and I have no comment on it.

"Their bed, their business." I always say. It's not my job to tell people how they should f*ck, and insisting that people f*ck to my taste would be deeply arrogant.

[Asker]

I'm just not a supporter of consent by a one-sided standard. The problem is doing this stuff just because to please a guy, and not because they actually "like" that. Which I'm afraid is often times the case.

[l-hedoniste]

"consent by a one-sided standard"? No such thing; consent implies *agreement*. No agreement, no consent. Also, whether she's doing it to please her man, or whether she likes it, or whether she's feeling p*rny: It's. Her. Call. Not yours, not mine--hers. If it's not your thing, fine, but that has nothing whatever to do with whether it's *her* thing.

[Asker]

If you like to hit people and I consent to letting you hit me and cause me physical pain because I think you're a swell friend and I want to show you a good time. There's something really wrong there. Wrong with me, and you... our friendship would not be a healthy one.

[l-hedoniste]

Hello? Whips and chains, cats and canes? Where have you been, man?

Have you seen what Rihanna's been doing lately? link

There are girls who are *very* into spanking and striking and pain. Luckily, because they can CONSENT to what they want from they partners, they get to AGREE upon who will hurt them, and how, and with what. It's the sort of thing kinky people NEGOTIATE constantly.

NEGOTIATE. AGREE. CONSENT. Kinky people have used this formula successfully for decades.

[Asker]

No I don't care about what kind of image a pop star is trying to sell. None of that rhetoric addresses the wrong in my "me letting you hit me" analogy. First you said it "has nothing whatever to do with whether it's *her* thing, now you're talking about them consenting to have something THEY WANT. Flip-flop to avoid the issue, the fact that outside of the loony p*rn world women are subjugated to this behavior against their desire because of things like p*rn.

[l-hedoniste]

Quoting someone out of context is an act of bad faith. The full quote: "It's. Her. Call. Not yours, not mine--hers. If it's not your thing, fine, but that has nothing whatever to do with whether it's *her* thing." Consent is ALL I've been discussing here, yet you somehow chop my words to change my position. Shame on you. Fortunately, my position is both simple and consistent. Again, for emphasis: "It's. Her. Call. Not yours, not mine--hers."

[l-hedoniste]

I get it, you don't like how a girl might decide to use her power of consent, but you're failing to realize that IT'S NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS. That's the beauty of consent, she gets to do it for herself, not for you. She can--and should--ignore you, me, and everyone when making up her mind what she wants.

[Asker]

Hey, I can have my say on foreign policy all day long, just because I'm not the one in charge of it doesn't mean it's none of my business. Same with any social issue the way I see it.

[l-hedoniste]

Your analogy fails: Foreign policy: public acts, by people representing us, concerning everyone Face f*cking: private affair, by people representing themselves only, concerning f*cker, f*ckee, and no one else. This should be immediately obvious. You really can't tell the difference between public and private activity?

[Asker]

Social issues are of concern to anyone participating in our society, even if they're not directly involved. Pornography and it is affects are a social issue, just like drugs and their effects on society. Such issues have been topics of debate for our representatives. Point being it is a social issue and everyone is entitled to their opinion of it. Face f*cking: a public portrayal, by p*rnography representing our sexuality, concerning anyone who watches.

[Anonymous]

Most of those girls are given doses of opiates to minimize the pain and keep them going throughout those scenes. Most of those girls don't last in p*rn very long, they were most likely runaways who were picked up off the streets and were offered jobs doing that; tricked into thinking that p*rn was glamorous.

[Opinion Owner]

They're also given lots of stimulants like cocaine to keep them going like that so they can do multiple scenes of that gruesome action.

[Asker]

I actually heard this was true from an interview with a girl who does p*rn. They dope up just so they can handle the abuse a little easier. That's sad.

[udolipixie]

Is anyone else bothered with this whole "face f***ing" thing? only when it comes to sexual compatibility of a partner

[icanhelp]

I totally agree. I know it's not a popular opinion but I hate p*rn, it's ruining intimacy and romance for our generation :(

[TurbulentDan12]

I hate watching that too. I don't see the appeal of hurting a women during sex or making her uncomfortable. Sex is supposed to be fun for both parties.

[Katyperry]

yeah right

[Shea25]

hmm, well I wouldn't want any boy to do me that although I do go down. the way you d describe it and I imagine it, it sounds cruel. my boyfriend gets turn on when I choke a little but he would neva go to this extent.

[Asker]

Doesn't it bother you that that turns him on? You don't like to choke, do you?

[Shea25]

well no, as long as he dnt over do it, I am str8. I dnt like to choke, but he only does it for a few seconds. it don't really bother me because he goes down.

[sannysanchezz]

I like it when girls facef*** guys? :)

[Hyped_up_on_coffee]

Yes it hurts like f*** ... I practically have no gag reflex from experiences like that along with road head

[Asker]

But why even let a guy do that? Didn't you get pissed at him or tell him to stop?

[jacquesvol]

next time, bite :666:

[Hyped_up_on_coffee]

i actually can deepthroat now cause of it

[Asker]

Well the point is, is that something you originally wanted to do? Or like doing? Because it's def not okay for a guy to force you into it.

[Hyped_up_on_coffee]

i guess

[MzHellfyre]

that doesn't sound very convincing :\

[Hyped_up_on_coffee]

im indiferent about a lot of things I just gotta get something in return

[Alexeiv]

It's the whole concept of watching fantasy. I don't personally take p*rn seriously.

[Asker]

You don't take it seriously, but you at least admit those girls are basically abused for your entertainment? How could you not take that seriously?

[Alexeiv]

Look fella, you have to accept life for what it is. 90% of the girls in the p*rn industry are lost causes, most have some misogynist fetish and the others are drug addicts. I don't watch gag factor or other films of the same nature very often, but I do because it does have its appeal. That said, I'd never incorporate that into my actual life.

[Asker]

I do accept life for what it is. Why not look at the p*rnographers who prey on said girls, they're the reason we have this stuff, not the girls. Doesn't matter how often or not you watch, you either endorse it or you don't.

[Alexeiv]

Then I guess I endorse it. Just like all the people who watch the Jackass films and support steroid induced athletes.

[Shaun]

I'm not bothered, I just don't watch it.

[Katyperry]

lol

[jacquesvol]

next time, bite :666:

[sweet_18]

Yeah that seems pretty extreme. I don't watch p*rn. I see no appeal in it. The only p*rn I've actually legitimately watched was soft p*rn on Hotel Erotica lol. It didn't turn me on and I actually thought it was kind of funny.

[Xx_DRE_xX]

I mean I like because it feels amazing but I wouldn't necessarily be forceful enough to gag a girl unless that's what she wanted I suppose.

[sexy_santiago]

I can't stand it because it looks uncomfortable for both

[Anonymous]

I really have no idea why guys like it or why girls let it happen. It seems pretty sick to me.

[Anonymous]

I've always thought of that as like the biggest possible turn off when it comes to sex and p*rn. To mean it's one of the most disrespectful, demeaning things you can do.

[Anonymous]

i'm with you... I don't know how I guy is turned on by a girl gagging on his penis, about to choke to death... sometimes a slightly aggressive blowjob can be hot, but facef***ing takes it to a whole new level... and the girls who let guys do that to them are f***ing morons. they clearly have a warped sense of self-respect. the only time I think it's acceptable is if both parties equally enjoy the act, some kinda 'domination' deal.

[Opinion Owner]

a guy*