I hate my body shape, how to reach acceptance?

OK, so this is not a relationship question. But I need advice. I hate my body shape. It's not that I'm overweight, if only it were that simple. I can lose approximately up to 15 - 20 lbs though... which I plan on doing, maybe not 20 'cause that would leave me borderline underweight. Anyway, I hate that first and foremost, I'm sorta pear shaped, so I feel a bit disproportionate. I have small boobs and a big ass. Ugh. Most guys like my butt, though (they don't know I have cellulite there, though). But for some reason it just seems boobs are more attractive than butts anyway, I mean let's face it, both men and women have butts and if you think about its function, it's anything but sexy. But breasts are distinctively feminine, and I've heard that "touching small boobs is like being with a little boy" so many times that well... it gets stuck in your head. But if I were a true pear shaped woman... I'd have a smaller ribcage and my ribcage is bigger than most girls' and that makes me feel so gross. I don't think I look like a guy 'cause I have a small waist and pronounced hips. But having a big ribcage just feels... unfeminine. Plus it makes my boobs look even smaller. I just feel big and not delicate like short, skinny girls. I'm also tan, and I think being pale is so much prettier. I can lose weight, but it won't change the things I dislike the most. It will certainly improve my body (unless it makes me lose what little boobs I have), but it won't change my basic structure. Surgery is not an option for me, and all other things I can't really change (I can't make myself shorter, or shrink my ribcage). So how can I accept my body? I get so down when I see all girls, some as tall as me, with much smaller, delicate bodies, or who are shorter and look skinnier and have big boobs... I just feel like my body is not sexy or beautiful despite some very feminine characteristics. How can I accept those things that I just can't change?
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Most Helpful Girls

  • Wow first, I am so sorry you are feeling this way. I've so been there. A couple years ago, I was 165 lbs, then I went crazy trying to lose weight (because I'd recently been rejected by my first love and thought that would show him). In short, I got down to 120 and was still unhappy. I was working out like crazy, barely eatting, and I was just tired of the daily struggle. It wasn't worth it... Now, I'm just under 140 and I look decentenough to feel attractive. I've got compliment on my legs, so I excentuate that quality. I sometimes fel masculine because I have a wide back an big shoulders, but if I wear razor-backs, I think it looks sexier. It's all about finding the things that look good to you and focusing on those things. So much of being attractive is THINKING you're attractive and exuding confidence. Don't put yourself down and don't hate who you are. Be proud and be happy.

  • I think you should learn to accept yourself being a little bigger doesn’t make you less of a woman then someone who was six stone - there is NOTHING wrong with the way you weigh unless it’s causing your major health issues. If you lose weight because you feel pressured to do so your not really learning to accept the real you which is beautiful the world is so concerned with looks and appearance but what actually matters is impacting the world based on your ability not your clothing size beauty isn’t skin deep it’s within and when you get older you’ll learn to be comfortable with the way you look x

  • Wear clothing for your body shape.

    Are you expecting us to bash big breasts, bash small butts and bash skinny girls?

    We can't force you to accept your body. Wear cute/sexy panties and bras that way you can feel sexy(even if it's all in your head), wear clothing that accentuates your body type in a good way

    Idk I'm an hourglass and IMO I think the biggest mistakes most women make is not dressing for their body type. When you look good you feel good.

    Can't change your body shape but you can change your weight

    • "Are you expecting us to bash big breasts, bash small butts and bash skinny girls?" No.

Most Helpful Guys

  • you have to accept that everyone has different tastes and see if you can be happy with the type of guys you can land :)

    • By what you say it sounds like you think I'll have to maybe settle for guys who'll accept me? That I'll have to be thankful if a guy is attracted to me or something.

    • no, less attractive girls will have to 'settle' so maybe, but less attractive guys WILL be attracted to less attractive girls too so you'll definitely get one, but I don't know what you look like for all I know you might be really really hot. From the way you describe yourself, small boobs I find perfectly attractive and a big ribcage I don't know what even looks like, it's not something you hear often so it's probably no biggie. You might land really hot guys. :)

  • It sounds like you're mesomorph body type. Am I right? Google it if you need to.

    • HUH?

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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • people want things they can't have,i'm pale and I'd like to be tan (it would make it easier to get makeup and well there's a reason people tan,it makes them look leaner and they don't look like they live in a basement 24/7) and I'd love to have a bigger ass.

    you just need to realize that there are good things about all types of bodies. like this-you have small boobs?-they won't get as saggy as bigger ones,you don't have stretch-marks on them

  • Girl what? I wish I was pear shaped like you, lol. I'm the complete opposite of what you are. I'm 5'1 about 117+lbs with 34DD boobs. Although I dont necessarily think my butt is flat I would love for it to be bigger than it already is so I'm working out and researching what I can do to do that. You should always love yourself but if you really feel bad about it than you should do something about it that can improve your confidence. If you start working out and doing research about it than you can definitely get the body you want, just be realistic about your goals. I'm sure your a beautiful girl already but if this is really bringing you down than you should see what you can do about it that isn't surgical and there are quite a lot of ways to do it ❤️💖.

  • Pear shape sounds kinda hot to me.

  • Many people make a big mistake, they always compare themselves with other people.

    • It's hard not to when your ex has told you your t*ts are too small, and "of course every guy thinks p*rn stars are the hottest women on Earth". Maybe I'm just traumatized, but I'd never criticize a boyfriend like that.

  • Always Remember that...there are always people like you on earth with the same problems...and people who appreciate your imperfections.

    Just believe you are on the same level as a human and you will be ok.

  • why would you feel unhappy about your shape.
    I think you are very attractive and there are plenty of guys that will date you.