My girlfriend wants me to finger her but she is a virgin. I will end up breaking her hymen right?

This might be a stupid question but if I do break her hymen I want it to be during actual sex. Can I finger her good enough if I just use clit stimulation? Feed back from girls and guys would be great. Thanks!


Most Helpful Girl

  • Well, not all hymens are the same (click here for educational pictures! link ). Depending on the size of her hymen, it is possible to finger someone without it breaking, and sometimes it will stretch rather than tear. There's also a chance that she doesn't even have a hymen, as some women are born without one, or often the hymen can be broken through other means (masturbation, using tampons, playing sports, etc.). So, to answer your question, it might break, it might not, or it might already be broken.

    "Can I finger her good enough if I just use clit stimulation?" Many women prefer clitoral stimulation to vaginal fingering, but it really depends on the girl.

    But, the fact that you're placing that much importance on breaking her hymen during intercourse seems kind of creepy, and even selfish to me. Why is it important? Would you avoid pleasuring her by fingering her vaginally (if that's what she wanted) just so you get to break her hymen during intercourse instead?


What Girls Said 5

  • Well if she's asking you to finger her - it may already be gone, via masturbation.

    I started masturbating or whatev - and it really hurt at the time to even put half a finger in there. ( I lost my hymen some mysterious way, probably sports lol I don't know but it wasn't there,)

    So if she's asking you to do it, I think she's already done it herself, liked it, and wants you to do it to her.

    • Oh and I mean, it hurt to try due to virginity. However, you have to do it a bit to start getting the better feelings, so if it feels good for her - yea, she's already messed around down there.

  • Honestly, it's very hard for a girl to get off on vaginal stimulation. It's ALL about the clit, honey. And like others have said, she may have had her hymen broken already with sports and stuff, so I wouldn't worry about it. Just have fun and respond to her responses!

  • My hymen was not broken when the guy fingered me...

  • why does it matter if you break it during fingering or sex? O.o


What Guys Said 2

  • you could possible break it, why not have sex with her instead?

  • As Sweetness has said, she may not have a hymen any more. Many girls lose it over the years. Horse back riding, or landing on the cross bar of their brothers bike, or school sports, or through early experiments in masturbation.

    It would be possible to masturbate her without necessarily going near the vaginal canal. But that wouldn't be as much fun for her. It's like saying.. yes, she could get you off by using one finger to stroke the base of the glans... but that's not the same as getting a hand job.