Did he lose interest? He initiated everything. Now I feel he isn't interested anymore

[Anonymous]

It all started when one of my guy friends told me that his friend whom I used to like liked me also when we were in high school. I was too shy and I didn't know how to talk to him and he's the exact same way except he's worse. So two years after high school I decided to give it a try. I sent him a message on Facebook and caught up with him. I texted him asking if he wanted to get lunch with me and a friend of mine but he was somewhere else. Eventually he came around and he randomly texted and asked how I was doing. After a lot of us texting back and forth he asked me if I wanted to go out sometime. We did and he's not the same shy guy anymore. I'll admit I was kind of intimidated. I also discovered that I don't know how to talk on dates. I asked him questions that I know shouldn't have even been talked about. I asked him about his sexual past and he was honest he said he's not a virgin and he told me one of the girls he'd slept with. I know her. I asked him questions about the girls he used to like and that's mainly what we talked about. I asked him if he regreted it and he said no. On top of that I was very insecure and shy and probably even sad. On our way back I asked him what he thought I had done sexually and he guessed at least made out. I told him no.. And that also I was virgin. The whole date didn't go as we planned. I was hurt especially hearing about the women he'd been with. I already know now that talking about that on a first date is wrong. When I got home I texted him thank you and he replied back no problem tell me if you wanna do it again. So I did... Me: hey:) can you still hang out before you leave? Him: yeah sure Me: k:) when do you leave again? Him: jan 9 Me: k, I'll let you know (three days later) Me:Ben!:) can you still hang out? Him: Yeah I can, I don't know exactly when this week. Can I let you know? Me: Ok..:) (next day) Him: I might be free Thursday...still not sure though. are u? Sorry, I actually made ally of plans this week but I think Thursday works Me: It's fine. If you can't just let me know.. do you know what time you can hang out? Him: still not sure ha ha sorry Me: It's fine.. if you can just let me know. Hope your doing well:) Next day Him:Hey annete, wanna have lunch tomorrow? Me: Yea sure..:) can you pick me up again? Him: Sure Would one o clock be okay? Me: Yea that's fine.. just text me when you leave. See you later then:) Next day Him: Hey Annette, I'm really sorry but is there anyway we can reschedule? I think I caught the flu... (an hour later) I'm sorry:/ Me:Dont be sorry.. It's fine:) I hope your OK and you get better tho! yea we reschedule.. Just tell me when your good:) Him: alright, if not this weekend, maybe the next? Me: ok:) and I hope you get better! This last text was four days ago.. For our first date he initiated everything.. He even reminded me about it. Now I think I blew it with him.. Should I try or just leave him alone?

[MrOracle]

First of all, (virtually) ALL guys WANT sex. You can go ahead and assume that any guy who is paying any extra attention to you is at least somewhat sexually attracted to you, even if only in a very general way.

So the question is: is sex ALL that the guy wants, or does he want something more?

A guy who only wants sex isn't going to hang around very long after you tell him that he isn't getting any anytime soon. For him, why would he bother, when there are other girls around who are much more willing? If sex is all that he wants, he's going to try a whole lot of girls for a short time, filter out the ones who aren't willing, and focus on the ones who are. That's pretty straightforward.

Now, if a guy actually is interested in a relationship, then he's going to be willing to wait longer (not forever, but longer), and he's going to be willing to put more effort into the relationship, because he wants the relationship.

Right now, it's too early to know what he's looking for, but it's getting close to the time when you'll have your answer.

In the future, you need to learn not to ask questions that you won't like the answers to. His past is his past, and really doesn't matter anymore. His present is what is important, unless his past is continuing to affect his present.

[Asker]

I see.. Do you think I should contact him or just wait? I was gonna contact him to see how he was doing but not say anything about the date and see what he says.. Is that a god idea?

[MrNameless]

Why didn't you ever initiate back? I don't know why things didn't go out on the dating.. But I'll tell you my opinion on initiating conversations/dating at least. I hate doing it all the time, and I think the girl is just leading me on/isn't interested.

[SuRpRiZeD]

no I would continue trying because it really does sound like he wants to date you, allthough it might be for sex and I don't know if your chill with that

[Asker]

How do you know it's for sex? How'd you pick up on that?

[SuRpRiZeD]

if like after 4 dates you don't give him anthing sexual he stops talking to you