How badly do men take sexual rejection?!?

[tamana]

I was staying with a friend of mine for the weekend, and one thing led to another, we eventually started getting intimate, he then asked me to give him a blow job, I said no, he asked me a couple of times, I stil kept saying no because I was not ready for it. It annoyed him so badly! he knows I like him a lot but I just wanted to wait so that I have a better chance of having a long term relationshiop with him instead of just becoming a friend with benefits...what is going through his mind? why did he take it so personally? why do you take rejection so badly?is it a pride thing? guys I need your opinion, but girls are also welcome to answer my question too..thanks

[l-hedoniste]

I don't take rejection badly at all, but then I don't ask for blowjobs either:

"Gimme blowjob."

"No."

"Gimme blowjob."

"No."

"Gimme blowjob!"

"No!"

Why do this?

If I were dating you, and it were getting intimate, we would have had the sex talk, so I would have known what to expect.

If I wanted a booty call, the first "No" would have settled it.

Your boy was too optimistic/horny, and it made him stupid. Try making your intentions clear: "If you want a booty call, I'm not the one."

[tamana]

I think your right, he was both optimistic/horny, I'm a virgin so he should have realised! if he was trying to make me a bootycall then it failed, I will find out in time what he realy sees me as, and I haven't come out looking bad in the situation at all I don't think

[Anonymous]

I have a different view than most, I don't believe in casual, non-marital sex, for a bunch of reasons. So my answer comes from within the context of an existing sexual/marital relationship.

For me to be rejected sexually by my wife is something that will blow my day completely if not multiple days thereafter. I feel worthless and unneeded/unwanted in life. It is not that I am upset at not getting laid, per sey, but a s a person I feel rejected by the one person whom I trust the most and to whom I am the most vulnerable.

[rejectedagain]

I am with you 100% on this - I feel exactly as you do and it's hell.

[Angie-0905]

I don't think he necessarily took it personally. I think he was just horny and wanted you to help him out.

You did the right thing. You weren't ready and you wanted it to be something more. He should just get over being pissy and respect and accept your decision.

[tamana]

He is being nice to me since, so he's thought about what he did...Ive not made a big fuss about it, so I know that he will appreciate that aswel. it puts me a good light with him hopefully

[Angie-0905]

I hope so too. I'm glad he realized he was in the wrong with the situation.

[Anonymous]

They take it pretty badly. After I rejected one guy, he took it upon himself to tell everyone we did it anyway. If a guy is hounding you for sex he is a jerk anyway.

[Linds]

Your bruised his poor ego (momma used to tell me this, haha). He'll live. It isn't your concern :)

[sumina7]

Do what you think is right for you. He has to handle his own feelings and do what he thinks is right for him.

[oldmaninthemoon]

I belive you did the right thing, as a man if I get turned down it fells like your turning me personaly down and not just the sex.Did he ask to go down on you? If not then he was only out for himself and didn't care at all for you.

[tamana]

He didn't go down on me but was stimulating me, he knew that I was fully turned on. but I want a long term thing with this guy so I don't want to get too physical too soon..i have made a big fuss about it and I am being completely normal so hopefully he won't take it personally. Ironically, its cos I lik him soo much and want more form him is the reason why I'm not jumping straight in..

[oldmaninthemoon]

Cool you go girl I agree withi-head he sould have taken no the first time like any normal man but then any normal man wouldn't have asked without talking it all over first with you.

[dave216]

"I want a long term thing with this guy so I don't want to get too physical too soon" So are you saying by denying his wishes he will want too stay with you? That he will enjoy being rejected? Your decision is fine with me, I am just trying to understand the logic of it.

[tamana]

Im afraid he won't think of me as long term potential if he thinks I'm willing to give into his request so easily. I don't want him to think I'm easy. where still only friends.

[rambored96]

nah you just upset him a wee bit.

[Telemusik]

can take it or leave it ;)

[ralphieboy13]

We don't take it that bad we just go home and choke the chicken to a picture of your face photo shopped onto a pornstar.

[ollieabove]

Honestly your in charge of your body no your friend family boyfriend or husband if your really not ready then don't. The guy probably took it a little personal so it wouldn't hurt to kind of share why.