Do I cry too much? Will my boyfriend eventually think I'm being dramatic?

Alright, he has not said he has a problem with it, and when I go to another room to cry and get it out on my own, he follows me and tries to get me to let him hold me. Since we met in July and began dating, several movies we watched together have made me cry. (Up, Benjamin Button, The Descendants, and probably one or two more that I can't remember.) My grandmother got really sick and put in hospice care and on a breathing machine and she eventually died, I cried a lot over that, and occasionally still cry when I think about her. I cry when my mom is really rude to me and brings up my past. I got pregnant at 16 and was in shock and basically pushed into an abortion and I still struggle with that and my mom and dad like to bring it up and throw it in my face whenever they are mad, which ends up with me crying. My parents are divorced and whenever I go and visit my dad, my mom likes to kick me out of the house. Also, movies with the subject of abortion and/or rape make me cry. (We only have sat through one of those, Ides of March.) Then, last night, I was extremely upset because I would like to model in the future, I am 5'11 and it's something I want. Anyways, today I found out that my size (4/6) is now considered plus size in the modeling world. Which also made me think of something my boyfriend carelessly said during a Lane Bryant commercial (plus size store). He asked me why the models on the commercial didn't look normal and I asked him what normal looked like to him, and he said "Like Victoria Secret models". I talked to him about it last night and told him how gross and ugly it made me feel because I will never look like a Victoria Secret model. He proceeded by telling me that I do look like them, and saying half of them look malnourished. I told him it was dumb of his too lie like that, because I mean... come on.. And after turning off the TV and us trying to go to bed, I left the room so I could cry it out and sleep, where he followed me, and I told him to go to bed and I'd be there later, and when I got back he continued telling me how beautiful I am and crap. I feel like when I cry, it's justified and for a good reason, and I really do not like to cry in front of people, but with him I feel comfortable to sometimes. I understand I have a gross amount of drama, but he accepts it and he says none of it is in my control, but I still feel like maybe I am crying too much.
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Most Helpful Guys

  • bwhahahaha victoria secret models are normal? does he have any idea what the f*** he is talking about? the victoria secret angles go through one of the most selective and most riggerous selection processo of of any modeling group in the world, thousands may try and only a handful will succeed, your at a good weight they are just f***ing supernatural and you gain nothing from comparing yourself to them your fine. Next as to your crying, well you seem to have reasons enough people have been sh*tting on you for a while which will make many people cry and as for crying in movies, I still cry in the lion king "why Mufasa why?!" I don't cry at family funerals and stuff bu I do stil cry everyone does once in a while you have just been given more reason to than most. But just because its OK dosnt mean its positive, nothing is gained from crying it always helps to toughen up which is my recommendation for you I just didn't want you to feel like you are currently doing something wrong

    • Thank God, Lion King makes me cry too. And yea, it made me really mad when he said that, because their models are airbrushed and oiled down too in order to up the sex appeal and make them look more luscious, and I dunno.. just the fact that he said that made me feel like I couldn't live up. Which we spoke about last night and he apologized. It's just really hard. Even my best friend and my cousin call me out on having smaller boobs and sh*t. I hate it.

  • Jesus f***. You're a 4/6? Eat a goddamn hamburger or something, poor kid.

    If you're interested in modeling, you should know that the camera adds weight, so your boyfriend was probably not lying when he said you look like a VS model. Also, you're ~never~ going to find something in a 4/6 in a Lane Bryant store, you idiot. Just because the ~modeling world~ considers 4/6 to be "plus size" doesn't mean that anyone else does. I guarantee you look ~nothing~ like a Lane Bryant model. If you tried to wear anything from one of their stores, it'd look like a damn TENT on you. Their sh*t STARTS at size 14 and their models TOTALLY reflect that. My girlfriend is a size 12, and SHE still looks thinner than a LB model.

    Of course, ten years ago she was a size 6/8 and thought she was a cow. F***ing moron.

    Forgive me for being blunt, but just because you've got the self-esteem of a worm doesn't mean your boyfriend's lying, it just means you're an incomprehensible idiot.

    • Oh, trust me, I eat a LOT. Like a horse. Or a cow. Yesterday I had 6 cheese sticks, 6 taquitos, 3 burgers, and a box of mac and cheese. And the day before I had three burgers for lunch. I'm thin because I am tall and have a fast metabolism. And I know my size is not at Lane Bryant. They are actual plus size. But I meant for runway I am considered plus size. Like, for America's Next Top Model, I'm plus size. Which kinda sucks, because I want to do that, but a size 0/2 on some one my height?

    • It's disgusting. And also, it's my hips that make me that size. I can't change my bones. I looked an an article where the perfect size for waist to hip ratio is .7, which I have. It's the body men find most attractive. and if I got skinnier, that proportion would be blown off. My waist is 24 inches and my hips are 35in. And I have reasons for my self esteem being sh*tty, a lifetime of bullying tends to do that. I'm most insecure about my boobs (34B), not being fat. I'm thin.

    • Good god, 34-24-35? You're f***ing crazy. Okay, look. I understand that some people in the ~modeling world~ (where anything but a size 0 emaciated skeletal trainwreck is considered fat), would think that you're a cow. But to ~real~ men, like your boyfriend (the one you claim to, y'know, love) you've got an awesome body. Women all over this country would KILL to have a body like yours. Literally. I'm glad you can eat. That's good.

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Most Helpful Girls

  • Some things you do have a reason to cry about. I mean honestly, the whole family/grandmother dying/pregnancy stuff is really traumatic. It's not at all something you should repress your feelings about that, it would be extremely unhealthy.

    The whole modeling fit though was exaggerated, especially the part where you wanted to leave. I mean, please. Do you realize how frustrating it would be to him? He probably thought he was making you feel better and you ended up crying and refusing his consolations. Sorry, but that would be plain annoying to me.

    • I did apologize to him for that. Because I do understand how frustrating it is when you compliment some one and they won't just take it. And when I came back after crying it out I laid down and let him spoon me and when he kept telling me how beautiful I am and that I look like a VS model to him I told him to just stop and he recoiled a bit so I backed into him more and apologize. I do get that it's frustrating. The fact that every guy has cheated on me with a girl with giant t*ts makes me feel

    • bad about my own. And I have gone through being bullied about my breast size (34B), and I've had my other grandmother (the one alive) and my brother calling me fat for years.. and I'm not, I get that. But if you hear it for so many years.. It's hard.

    • I see. Well, just realize your boyfriend's just trying to make you feel good. Forget the whole comparing to models thing, just focus on the fact that he loves you. I have small breasts too (36B) and I'm not self conscious about them all somehow - although I should be because they're sort of disproportional to my body (I'm curvy). I'm sorry about what you went through.

  • No you don't cry a lot its not like you're crying over a paper cut, these things are legit. Also crying can mean a lot of things. Some people cry when they're sad (obviously), mad, touched by a movie or w.e I don't think it should be seen as dramatic, its human nature.

    • Ha, go tell that to anonymous male user up there. Doucher. :c And I dunno, I mean he cried in front of me once.. and I've cried in front of him like.. 13 times.

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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • Answer is no...if you are crying it is probably because you need to...just do me a favor and do not put yourself down...not saying that you are...but it is a turn off to a lot of us when our partner puts themselves down...we like to think that our SO is special so putting yourself down is kind of like throwing water in our faces..I wish you al my best...and I am sorry for the burden that you bear...(:

  • Yes He Will

    and

    Yes You Are

    and

    Yes this is not the first time this has been brought to your attention in your life

    • Uhm, yes, it is the first time it has been brought to my attention. But okiedokie.

  • I don't think you cry too much, there's a lot of horrible stuff in that post. But I do think that you're being overly sensitive about some other things. And I think your boyfriend needs to learn that he doesn't need to console you every time you cry.

    Sometimes girls just cry, because it feels good to cry. It's cathartic. It's not always a sign that something is wrong, which he needs to fix.

    And you should really listen to your boyfriend when he says you're good looking. You are. And in his eyes, even more so.

    • I love that you understand the whole "Crying feels good thing", I'm sure I read somewhere the crying is healthy. But, yea, thank you.