Am I giving them the wrong image? Can guys really "see" how a girl is below her clothing?

[Anonymous]

I'm tall. Not REALLY tall, but taller than 90% of the girls from my country. So, of course, that makes me look slimmer. At the same time, I'm not fat, but I don't exercise either, so I may appear to be kind of "fit", sometimes, but, in fact, I'm not. I have a really round and neatly-shaped butt, but it is not "fit", it's really sot and all that. Same thing about my belly - it may appear to be more flatter than chubbier, but, in fact, I have a little fat there (I know that for sure, as I had a flat stomach when I was into swimming). I've been told that my boobs are big, but I wear a simple 34B size, and I think my boobs are more of a "regular" size than a "bigger than average" one. So, the thing is: I'm kind of average. Even my face, hair (simple brown) and eyes (simple brown) are average; I'm pretty, although I'm not drop-dead-gorgeous. But it seems like everyone sees me as "above average"... And I feel like I'm "lying" to everyone, because I know what I am, and I'm afraid that, once I get to go to the beach with my friends, or to the pool, or to the water park, or, damn it, even when I end up having sex with a boyfriend, in the future... I'll disappoint them all. Can you guys really tell how a girl looks like without clothing? Or are you probably picturing girls in a more "attractive" way when you check someone out? Have you guys ever been let down by a girl, once you saw her naked?

[MrOracle]

Yes, guys are very good about figuring out how a girl looks under her clothes. Most women's clothing is pretty tight or revealing, even if they aren't intentionally so, and most guys are going to have a pretty good idea what's going on under there.

You may not feel like you are "Olympic Athlete" fit, but just because you have a hint of a belly doesn't mean a guy isn't going to love your body. Really, if he likes YOU, then he's going to see your body as being attractive no matter what. And he isn't going to be doing a critique of you anyway; you'll probably find that his focus is on "certain areas", and that he has a huge smile on his face.

If a guy didn't find your body type attractive, he wouldn't approach you in the first place. You can't hide your height, and you can't hide your face, and, for example, unless you're wearing some HUGE padded bra, a guy isn't going to expect you to be hauling DD-cups out of your B-cup bra. But he has EYES, so he can see what your body is like before he even talks to you, and by the time he gets to know you, trust me, his eyes have scanned your body from every angle. If he's still persuing you, you can bet that he's happy with what he sees.

Beauty really IS in the eye of the beholder, and in general, guys are not nearly as picky as girls seem to think, largely because other girls ARE picky, and so girls assume guys must be even worse. The truth is that GIRLS are much more critical of other girls' bodies (and their own) than any guy will ever be.

[TheAnswerer]

You really don't need to worry about it.

You know that a general way of measuring someone's "fit"ness, PURELY in terms of weight, is the Body Mass Index?

The BMI states that, if your weight (in kg) divided by the square of your height (in meters) is within a certain range, then your weight is fine. (I can't give a proper range for you, because it changes with age.)

Anyway, see the trick here? Your BMI states that, even though you might have some fat, you are still fine because you are tall.

So, you are not lying to anyone. You ARE fit, and you ARE thin, and you ARE above-average.

Please stop worrying about it.

P.S. Although you may think that the discussion about the Body Mass Index was kind of arbitrary, it serves the point that your "ideal weight" is actually a function of your height, so you don't have to be sad if you have the slightest bit of fat, because you are tall.

[toulouse]

how tall are you?

& being tall doesn't really make you look thinner, unless you are the same weight, as a shorter person if you are more weight, you look bigger generally. because you stick out & have more weight, in general.

if your concerned about being flabby, just work out, or exercise by doing things you like to do. swim, play soccer, ru, hike, w/e. anyways its good for your heart to be fit. I don't think people seeing how unattractive you -really- are, is an isue. if you think your not in shape, get in shape. no one is genuinely what everyone else thinks. you can't be. there's one of u, & 7 billion perceptions of u.

[rudy37lee]

I think to a certain extent we all feel sometimes that people see us in our best light and that someday you'll be 'figured out' and they'll realize you're not as great as you seem, that you've been faking it. This appears to be what you are going through, it just has to do more with your physical being than with your emotional and mental one. Don't worry, you aren't lying to anyone, just be true to yourself and genuine and you will attract people that will want to treat you with the same respect.

[louiseee]

You sound like me.. I'm a 34 B, I look fit but I don't exercise (see my profile pics), and I'm 5 feet 11 inches. Ha.

[Habakkuk]

well, there's nothing wrong with the way you described yourself, you sound attractive, a lot of people like brown hair and brown eyes etc. You're not lying to anybody by wearing clothes anymore than anyone else does.

[Dylan1989]

You're thinking too much. You're becoming paranoid and it's making you feel insecure. So others may think you are slimmer than what you are. It doesn't matter. It's not like you're lying or committing a crime just because other people think you're slimmer than what you actually are. Breathe dude lol.

[I_Like_Big_Butts]

Clothing really is like an extension of our body, though it can get an illusion of how our body looks. Personally, this is a little over board with worrying about how your body compares to others. You are you and you should just rock the body you have and have a wonderful life :)

[TheAnswerer]

Agreed. (+1)

[Anonymous]

Put up a shot with clothes on and we'll see!

[Anonymous]

I think you're letting your insecurities make you paranoid. Maybe you're good at choosing clothes that are more "flattering," but that doesn't mean you're some ugly monster underneath, haha. The first time I saw my girlfriend naked, sure there were stretch marks and love handles I wasn't aware of, but that doesn't mean I was "let down" in any way. I wasn't less attracted to her at all. Just stoked.

[HotPepper302]

Aw :)

[hehelol]

i second that aww :)