Guys how far do you expect a make out session to go?

[Anonymous]

do you get pissed if a hot make out session doesn't end in sex? I was making out with this guy I just started seeing and he carried me to his bed, it was great. we took some of our clothes off. he wanted sex but I wasn't ready, it felt too soon. he also wanted a BJ which was fine. I gave him one and he was about to come and enjoying it a lot. but then he stopped me because he said if I'm not going to have sex with him he needs to calm down and relax himself because I'm "making him too excited and horny" yeah I'm horny and enthusiastic myself but he was close to orgasm and I was more than willing to finish him off (I really wanted to in fact). was he just acting like a stubborn child because I wouldn't have sex?

[DebiPie]

Well, no offense, really, because I think "no" means "no" any & every time a man or woman says it. that means even if you're buck naked & he's just about in you.

That said, I think you have to use some common sense in every situation. If you are making out & he carries you to his bed, and you let him, continuing to make out, take your clothes off, giving him a BJ...I think you can safely assume that he thought you two were going to have sex. When you stopped him he was frustrated.

If you thought it was "too soon" then you should have said that sooner so that he would have known & had the, er, "heads up." I think teasing a man, or woman for that matter, and then leaving them hanging, is not cool.

[DebiPie]

Re: update: I hope I didn't misspeak, I do think you have the right to so "no." I defend your right to say that at any time. I'm just saying, be up front from the start about what you are not willing to do, like, I am not going to go all the way, but I will do BJs. That way he knows what to expect & no problems. And even then, if you or he change your minds & don't want to go that far & say no, you should be able to do that. Decent folks will take no for an answer. Sorry if I insulted you.

[lacesout]

A hot make out session usually leads to hot sex.

You shouldn't have aroused him in the first place.

If he stopped you mid blow job give him props..most guys would never do that.

I think he is just trying to respect your decision for no sex.

[katiesmuff]

I think you hit it on the head when you said acting like a child

[bigboi38]

I think he was being a brat cause you didn't want to have sex with him which is dumb, he should have been happpy that you were willing to suck his d*** and make him cum. I don't know what his deal is. If I was in that position and a girl said she didn't want to have sex but she would give me head I would be beyond happy. maybe he felt bad that he couldn't do anything for you to get you off maybe he would feel bad just coming, I don't know, but I wish I was in that situation right now LOL

[Asker]

yeah well he asked me for sex a few times, we were cuddling and making out a lot and humping and all that, then he asked me for a BJ and I was really enthusiastic about it and he was getting into it, pushing my head down, groaning, etc and then he was just kind of like "enough". it was really weird. then later that day he told me he doesn't want to "start what we can't finish" I was so confused, I was totally willing to finish him off.

[bigboi38]

Thats total crap I don't know what is wrong with him. If you are giving me head and you are liking it and getting into it and want to finishme off I would be so excited. I wouldn't stop you and say something stupid like lets not start what we can't finish.

[Asker]

yeah I think he was being an a**hole and getting annoyed because I wouldn't have sex. it's not like we were seeing each other for a few weeks even, it had only been a few days.

[bigboi38]

Yeah ditch the chump and find someone who is going to enjoy what you have to offer. If he is this way now he is only going to get worse

[bigboi38]

I don't think you are a tease. If you say from the get go that you are not going to have sex and he asked for head and you agreed I still don't see how he thinks it was going to lead to sex especially after you told him that it wouldnt. I think he should have been happy with what he was getting.

[Asker]

we hadn't discussed any of it but when he asked I said it's too soon.

[dave216]

"Used for sex"? Once again, a childish idea. Adults realize that sex is between 2 people, both get pleasure from it and give pleasure to the other. It is not a one sided event, unless it is a rape.

[Asker]

yes, but if the guy deludes her into thinking he wants to date her and then just dumps her after she puts out, that is "using".

[dave216]

I do sense childish behavior here, but I'm not sure it was him. Seems like somebody was horny but decided to cling to that childish idea that it was "too soon". :)

[girloncue]

there are men out there that don't think like that. run the other direction. now. He's just going to get in your head and make you believe you have to have sex to keep him, which is someone you don't want.

[taster]

I would expect it to go just about as far...as she wanted it to go...and no problem here...but...sooner or later...would want to see some progress..I am not one that likes to spin their tires for eternity...(:

[taster]

@ Update...huh?

[Asker]

apparently, I'm a tease if I'm making out with a guy and fooling around in our underwear but not actually letting him have sex with me, even though I was totally willing to finish him off another way (blow). the only reason I didn't have sex is because I felt like if I gave it all up too fast he would just think I'm worthless and walk out on me, because I know some guys do that. plus I only had sex once and I'm inexperienced at it. but apparently that makes me a tease.

[taster]

oh..you asked this Question earlier..naw...you know I don't feel that way...anyway I am not into bjs...lol...I wish to give you oral...(:

[Anonymous]

He probably meant what he said. He was getting super horny but he had to stop because he knew you weren't going to have sex with him. You don't know for sure he was about to come and even if he was there are many reasons he might not want to come.

[Asker]

well he seemed pretty close and his penis was "contracting" the way it gets that heartbeat sensation when the erection is full on...pulsating. but I did think it was a bit odd.

[Opinion Owner]

Maybe he didn't know where he could come so he stopped or maybe thought you would think his come was gross. Maybe he didn't want to come and lose his boner because he was hoping you would change your mind about sex. Him stopping wasn't acting like a stubborn child though, no guy is going to deny himself an orgasm as some kind of way to get back at a girl.

[Asker]

ok fine but then next time we were going to hang out he pretty much said he doesn't want to get started if I won't have sex.

[Opinion Owner]

Well...from a guy's point of view I wouldn't want to make out that much unless I was going to have sex. Some making out is good but if it lasts for too long, and/or clothes start coming off and/or she touches or sucks my penis that is too far for me personally not to have sex. I would be VERY frustrated after going that far and not having sex. If you want to get to know him better without his sex drive getting in the way try just hanging out with him and not making out at all.

[Opinion Owner]

In response to update>> You're allowed to feel what you want but don't be surprised if you make out with a guy and he gets frustrated it doesn't lead to sex. The guy doesn't really want to come from oral, that's just foreplay, he craves sex.

[Asker]

i understand he wants it. I want it too but this was basically our first date. so it made me feel like all he wanted me for was sex. that's why I didn't do it. before I am ready to have sex I need to know that the guy isn't going to hit and quit it.

[Opinion Owner]

That's going too far for a first date for both of you in my opinion. If I'm a normal guy I'm not expecting oral at all on a first date so if a girl did go that far I'm thinking she's going to go all the way. If I was a hit and quit guy I would get the head and quit anyway so you're really not avoiding the hit and quitters with head, they've learned to be happy with just head and love it without craving actual sex.

[Anonymous]

I'm generally OK as long as it ends in ejaculation.

[Asker]

ok then what was this guy's deal?

[Opinion Owner]

He's an idiot. Yeah, he was probably banking on getting sex. I'd have happily blown in your mouth. Generally that's a very nice stop on the road to sex.

[Asker]

yeah then next time I saw him he said he doesn't want to start something we can't finish.

[Opinion Owner]

He's unbelievably stupid. Most guys would be very happy to go through all the progressions that lead to full sex--hand jobs, t*t f*cks, oral, and then sex. Just as long as at each stage, you finish the guy off (possibly more than once) to ease the pressure in his balls, you're good. Not only would I want to go out with you again, I'd make sure it became a regular thing.

[Opinion Owner]

And no, sucking a guy off does not--in ANY way--make you a tease. A tease will hold out the hope of sexual pleasure with no intention of taking the guy to orgasm. You're willing to get the guy off (thus his d!ck will not be "teased" but "satisfied") AND you've been clear about your boundries. So you're pretty much the opposite of a tease. A "please!" ;-)