I can't get over being circumcised....it depresses me.

[Anonymous]

So I was circumcised as baby..never thought of it much. I am now 21, and for a while now I came in contact with anti-circ activist types. I was shocked to find out how much damage circumcision does. Suddenly I began feeling awful about my body. To be honest, there have been other instances in my life where I have been obsessed over something that makes me feel like I'm "less of a man". I think this may be related to those issues I've had. Other examples include wanting to be distant from my mother/ her motherly affection, feeling intimidated by girls who have better academic.financial situations than me (i'm just now going back to school again 2 years of just working full time, I moved in with my parents which I felt a bit down about). This Obsession has made me bitter (secretly) against my parents and also against girls who say they prefer circumcised penises. I also have felt angered that any women I would potentially sleep with are intact and are not missing any sensitivity or nerve endings. To be honest I am very insecure when it comes to feeling inferior to women, and only women. I have thought about foreskin restoration..but I don;t know if I like the idea and seeing as how it doesn't really correct the damage in any significant way..it seems to be a waste of time. I am a Virgin and this issue makes me not want to have sex. I also get angry at other anti-circs even though I agree with them. All there activism makes me want to scream "so..yea..save our sons...but what about me...ur telling me all these detail about how I'm a sexually mutilated freak and less o man!" and to be honest...I won't have a son if I don't ever feel comfortable enough to have a sexual relationship, so its a moot point. Should I seek therapy to correct this? Or learn how to cope? I just don't understand how all the antic's guys that are cut are as down and depressed as me...we like to say were against mutilating baby boys...but they seem unlikely to view themselves as mutilated...I don't get it.

[Anonymous]

First off lets get one thing straight the reason men are circumcised is generally for religious reasons or because the parents believe it will be more sanitary (now mostly been proved wrong). This results in some desensitization, yes. And it is genital mutilation, yes. But even so you can still enjoy sex, cum, feel great, have sensation, all that stuff.

When a female is "circumcised" the clitoris is cut out completely, they loose all good sensation. And it is done to keep women in their place, to make sure they don't enjoy sex because that's a thing for men and it's wrong for women to feel good during sex.

Both are wrong, and both should be a choice the person gets to make when they come of age (more so male circumcision than female) but they are two completely different things and have completely different reasonings so lets not throw it about and say it's all the same because it's not.

Now for my statement about how it makes you feel-

It's understandable to be upset about it, I probably would be, too. But know that it wasn't about power or whatever it was them caring about you and trying to decide what was best. Did they necessarily have a right to do it? No but that's the way society is and complaining about it, and ranting about it here won't help. Instead go out and try to help educate people on the common myths people still believe about circumcision, try to get people to understand it is still genital mutilation and should be the choice of the boy, not the parents.

And no, what you're doing here, is not that.

Join one of those groups and try to (in a calm and tolerant manner otherwise no one will listen or care) try to educate others on your point of view and make some difference in our culture, our society.

As for your animosity towards your parents and your feelings of insignificance or female dominance, you need to talk to a therapist about that, no one here can help you. Lots of people feel that way, and it's easy to as females steadily move up their ranks in the world and start gaining ground. Talk to a professional about it, work out all your problems and try to help others work out theirs and try to help others understand why circumcision is still genital mutilation and why it shouldn't be culturally acceptable for the parents to do that to their baby (because it really shouldn't).

[peace-love-couture]

The intentions of female circumcision are completely different from male circumcision and yet, he calls one of the males down below ignorant when he doesn't even understand circumcision himself and has the nerve to insinuate they are the same.

[Asker]

of course I think both are wrong and I wasn't arguing theyre equal exactly (depends esp on to what severeity they are done) And this may sound selfish but I don't care about being an activist..other peopl will cut their kids no matter what..one more person won't make a difference. and by the way just a sied note..women aren't jsut gaining round...theyre overcoming men...big time...men are becomign an underclass and already are in many ways

[Asker]

Shut up peace...i didn't say they were exactly the same. is aid they were both mutilaiton your a clear example of women...only caring about themselves and downplaying any problems men face because of your vanity.

[Opinion Owner]

And it's men like you who are only adding to that take over. You are the reason for your own problem. People all the time go "Oh well, my vote won't matter" "one more voice doesn't make a difference" and all it takes is ten, twenty, a hundred people to do that and suddenly it does matter. If every one who said that did what they were scoffing at so much sh*t would get done. So if you don't care enough to go be active about it the STFU, no one cares. You're complaining to make people feel sorry

[Opinion Owner]

for you and no one does. You're the selfish one here. Grow up and quit complaining, or do something to change it.

[BillyTheMountain]

She doesn't sound selfish to me...

[Asker]

people obviously don't feel sorry...im just wondering what to do about ti but ya know after hearing all this and having everyone throw salt in my wounds...i've go an answer...and ill pursue it soon.

[Anonymous]

What the heck...I don't understand how having been circumcised makes you feel like less of a man...lots of girls prefer the look of a circumcised penis to an uncircumcised one. And as long as you don't have any health problems now that are related to your circumcision (which I doubt, you'd have a better chance of having gotten infections and such if you hadn't been circumcised), there's really no reason to be so angry right now. Also it's not attractive to be bitter towards your parents (for letting you move in with them rent-free) and distant from your motherly affection (a woman who brought you into this world). I don't see why you have those 2 issues because you 'feel like less of a man' but you ought to fix them because girls don't want someone who's unloving towards their mother!

[Asker]

Um because because par tof my body that 1) is part of the organ that makes me a man 2) provides pleasure and sensation 3) protects the rest of the penis from drying out and becomin de-sensitized...also...I do have health problems..my penis is de-sensitized and the also is incapapble of the "gliding" motion a penis should have. so becuas emy mom brought me into the world she canb sexually mutilate me is she wants...and if girls aren't against mutilation I don't want nething to do with them.

[peace-love-couture]

It's too little too late to complain about it

And if you're still stuck on being circumcised as a baby, you most certainly should seek therapy

[Asker]

Until part of clit gets removed...stop your condescending remarks.ur a woman...we cry and moan about female gential mutilation ina frica but yet women like demean men who ar eupset about their mtuialtion in the west...its easy for you to judge..ur genitals have not been cut up and your sex life knocked down several notches.

[peace-love-couture]

can't compare cut off genitals and sewn up vagina to some skin being cut off and you should get therapy and quit releasing your anger through rants regarding circumcision

[Asker]

it is comparable...the foreskin is aprt of the male gentoials and serve numeroud functions and contains tons of nerve endings...without it rrhe pensi become schaffed, dried out and desensitised...in addition to the enrve endings being gone and the lsos of the kins fucntion during sex...it widdles away a huge amount of sensation. I think you should try and not talk about somehting you don't understand and judge people who aren't a member of the protected gender like u.

[peace-love-couture]

lol

[peace-love-couture]

hardy harr harr

[Asker]

please tell me your not having children? god I hope your infertile or at least don't have a son.

[peace-love-couture]

I'll make sure to have 2 kids, since you won't be having sex any time soon, someone has to make up for your inability to get laid!

[Asker]

there already enough children in the world...and way too many women who are passive to mens suffering...be bette if you didnt

[Anonymous]

See a therapist or something and get over it.

And stop hanging out with anti-circ activists. They are hardly the most objective people in the world.

Talk to people who were circumcised in adult hood and had sex before and after, so they can tell you what if any difference there is.

You'll find the anti-circ crowd is full of crap.

[Asker]

most people that were circ in adulthood say that sex was a 10 and then a 3 afterward..some are very angry about it.

[Opinion Owner]

You are completely wrong!

[Asker]

do you have a study that says otherwise.

[Opinion Owner]

Here's a metric f***ton of peer-reviewed studies :

link

Now seriously! Stop hanging with those emotionally stunted freaks, talk to some real people, and get over it.

[Anonymous]

"Results of studies of the effect on penile sensitivity have been mixed. In a British study of 150 men circumcised as adults for penile problems, Masood et al. found that 38% reported improved penile sensation (p=0.01), 18% reported worse penile sensation, while the remainder (44%) reported no change"

[Asker]

those were adults..who were just recently circumcised..not guys who had it done at birth and then had all the years of chaffing and exposure .

[ladsin]

the damage of circumcision? I'm circumcised and I don't have any of those insecurities so my guess is its more just you...

[Asker]

ignorance is bliss

[ladsin]

ignorance? like I said I'm circumcised so I'm not really ignorant to it.. and as far as damaging effects of it I know of really only one... desensitized nerve endings... but I still enjoy sex with my d*** as is sooo

[Asker]

ur ignorant to what it should be like...im sure it enjoy it..but men who have it done alter in life say sex goes from being a 10 to a 3 after its done...and that's latter in life..mines been chaffed and damaged since I was born..u can settle for that and be ignorant and happy but that sh*t won't work for me.

[ladsin]

have you ever had it? its like saying I'm never gonna go see a movie because I've only ever seen VHS' but hey whatever be angry if you want

[Asker]

its more so that girls at an advantage and I don't like feeling inferior.

[ladsin]

in many countries female circumcision/ mutilation is and was common for centuries. except opposed to only sloughing off some skin, with female circumcision they remove the entire organ...

[Asker]

yea but I live in America where girls never get cut

[Anonymous]

Seek therapy. You seem unusually bothered by this. It's really not that big of a deal. You aren't "mutilated". You've just lost a small piece of skin. Your penis will function just fine without it. You can have a normal and fulfilling sex life. You just need to accept it. You disagree with practice. Fine. But the only thing holding you back is yourself.

[Asker]

but how can I sidagree with practice but feel okay wity myself? I sturggle with how I could do that.

[Opinion Owner]

That's why you may need a professional to help you figure that out.

[Anonymous]

You can't see it but I'm playing the world's smallest violin just for your plight...

[Anonymous]

There is no damage. You're just as sensitive as uncircumcised guys.

Yes, you should probably talk to a professional to help understand and get over this obsession.

[Asker]

u obviously have done zero reaseach...sensitivity does suffer...no one denies that in the medical community.

[Anonymous]

What am I missing here? Why would you want to deal with the extra skin on your d***? I bet more woman would prefer you without the foreskin than with it...

[Asker]

i don't care what women think...if they thoguht it looked better without the head of your penis would you cut if off?

[Anonymous]

whats done is done and there's nothing you can do. accept it and go on about your life

[Asker]

would you say the same thing if you clitoris was missing? I'm living my life but that doesn't mean I have to be at peace about it.

[Opinion Owner]

first of all they don't cut your d*** off so you are wrong about the anology. you mean clitoral hood not the clit itself. secondly you still can use it and have feeling so there's no reason to complain about it

[Asker]

ok fine then...what if part of clit was missin> would you be fine with that? and if it caused your clit to dry out and become desensitized and it was only 1/3 as pleasureable as it should be? ud really be oaky with that because you can "Still feel it" and actually idk...im might noe be able to cum..some guys can't because of being cut.

[Opinion Owner]

i had my clit hood pierced. its already desensitized but I'm not complaiing about it

[Asker]

the difference is that your clit is protected...the head of the penis without the foreskin is subjected to the elements and gets damaged and dried out.