Girlfriend wants me circumcised?

Me 32 is dating a woman (36) for a while now, but this weekend she came on strong for the second time that she want me to get circumcised.

I realize that she might loose sexual interest in me if I don’t. But I come from culture where circumcision is not that common unless it is for medical reason.

She claim it looks better and it is cleaner. I argued that I bath daily and usually before we are together so hygiene cannot possibly change much.

I am nervous about the idea for the reason that it might be painful, that masturbation may be difficult. That, if I need to move on, that there are also women who prefer uncircumcised penises. Being shy, I also don’t like the idea of going to a hospital where doctors and nurses are cutting away at my genitals.

She argue that women face similar things with breast and other cosmetic surgeries to look good for men, child birth and gynecology exams. Then why is circumcision so much different?

So I want to know if I should consider that she wants and that I am being unreasonable or selfish to be so sensitive about this and unwilling, or is she unreasonable to expect it from me?

Updates:
yes the funny thing is now a month later the relationship is over because of some other issues she has ext. but I'm glad I didn't make such a sacrifice, because our relationship would have ended before the wounds have even healed, for what? so I agree with most of you. Thanks don't circumcise yourself for a lover's approval.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • If you're 32 and uncircumcised, it would be absolutely RIDICULOUS for you to have the procedure done now. It would put you out of work for a while, and out of commission sexually for weeks, apart from the unnecessary pain it would cause.

    Yes, it would be painful. No, it wouldn't really affect masturbation (it's only the tip of the foreskin, the rest of the skin still moves like before). Yes, there are women out there who "prefer" uncircumcised penises, but in my experience, ones that actually CARE significantly one way or the other are extremely rare.

    Here in the U.S., it's done as a preventative measure. Circumcision as an infant causes pain that won't be remembered, and completely prevents several possible conditions that would be much more painful to deal with as an adolescent or adult. But you're 32. If any of those conditions were going to pop up, they'd have done so by now.

    Cleanliness isn't an issue if you take care of it, and "it looks better" is hardly a reason. You're not asking her to have cosmetic surgery on her genitals. Breast augmentation, childbirth and gynecological exams are completely irrelevant to the situation.

    She ~might~ be able to argue breast implants, but even still, cosmetic surgery isn't the NORM. Most women rely on makeup and push-up bras, which is about the equivalent of you stuffing a sock in your shorts. But ~childbirth~? Seriously? And gynecological exams for for HER HEALTH and have NOTHING to do with you or ANY other person.

    If this is a deal breaker for her, then it should be a deal breaker for you, in my opinion.

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What Girls Said 10

  • NO YOU SHOULD NOT! You keep your body the way you want it and not what someone else wants.

    Nothing wrong with your penis the way it is as long as you keep it clean (and that would be for circumcised or uncircumcised) which is normal anyway.

    If this is such a huge problem for her she might be better off to move on to find her circumcised guy who I am sure she will find something wrong to complain about. There are many girls like myself who would welcome a nice uncircumcised penis like yours.

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  • NEVER do anything to your body if you don't want to. That's all there is to it. Yes women go through cosmetic surgeries to look good for men, but a VERY small percentage do it because they're told to, they do it because they believe that men will prefer it. FYI most men I've spoken to HATE the feel of fake breasts and resent that a woman did that to their body. Child birth is a COMPLETELY different thing. Yes your body changes, but you don't do that just for someone else. You get a freakin' baby out of it... Gynecological exams cannot even begin to be seen on the same level as having surgery for aesthetic reasons.

    In other words, tell her 'hell no, my skin won't go' unless YOU want it for some reason. However, from what you've said it doesn't seem like you do. What if one day you break up, or she looses sexual interest ANYWAY. You'll resent her for making you do something to your body.

    So basically. NOOO.

    SAVE THE FORESKIN!

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  • Don't do it if you don't want to. It's your body, not her's. If she can't deal with it, then she's not worth it.

    On the other hand, there ARE some pros to getting circumcised if you ever do look into it. Some women prefer it because it makes them feel better about engaging in sexual activity with a guy. My sister for example, can't stand uncircumcised. She feels like it reintroduces bacteria to her body regardless of how clean they are, so because it's HER body, and she feels comfortable, she stays away from it.

    Even though it's ultimately your decision, you kind of do have to put yourself in her shoes and wonder why she feels that way. Is she really immature, or does she have a personal reason for it? Either way, it's probably best that she finds a guy who is circumcised, if she really can't deal with it.

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  • Are you insane? No woman has the right to demand any guy goes through unnecessary, painful surgery because its her preference. She is obviously extremely selfish, immature and a control freak.

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  • if a guy tried to convince me to surgically change myself to better please him I'd tell him to go f*** himself. same applies here.

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What Guys Said 9

  • If you're willing to go through with it, then I'd suggest finding someone who will numb you up pretty good beforehand. That, or have a Jewish rabbi do it. Someone who knows what they're doing. Don't trust just anyone with something like that.

    And yeah, she shouldn't feel like she has to force you to do it. If she's not your wife, then she has no right to be giving you orders on a manner like that anyway. She has no legal right to your down under; so she has no business dictating the removal of anything.

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  • say you'll get one if she has a circumcision as well

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  • She sounds selfish. And her "reasoning" by comparing female cosmetic surgery is stupid unless she has gotten it done for you.

    And this is coming from a circumcised man.

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    • Sorry to hear that, man, but I guess you live and you learn.

  • Tell her only after she gets female circumcision.

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  • Well then you have a choice to make..don't you? I cannot make this decision for you...you have to balance what you want with what she wants...I was circumcised at birth so that is normal & natural to me...

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