Well, I'm a Canadian raised by a German mother (very strict) and British father (extra-strict) so when I was a kid I was raised on all the old ways of respect and that includes women, everyone always says I'm kinda old fashioned (women with opinions are outliers to me and when I went to University I realized how a lot of people could see me as a little sexist) but my ideals were ingrained: Man protects and leads woman and she takes care of the children.
Then I met my girlfriend. A sarcastic, free-spirited little minx who quickly shot down all my Germaness with how anti-listening she is (hell, I listen to her half the time, she even won't let me keep my gun in the bedroom). When I met her she seemed like the most adorable little thing and considering I had been raised on German honour (wait for marriage) I was ecstatic about that. Then I found out she's been with a few guys and needless to say she broke me out of my German roots pretty quick within the year. Ever since then she tries to get me to slap her and do all this other stuff. I can't speak for most men but I've been pretty conditioned against that and it's tough to look at her and see her so cute and happy and hear her asking me to smack her as hard as I can for her enjoyment.
This is why my vater told me when I was a boy that I'll never understand women. And he's right. In any case, I'm getting there, maybe one day I'll learn how to really be a villain but, baby steps. Some men are just conditioned.
No and bring it on.
It's actually the innocent & cute ones who are the wildest in bed. Something like her built up aggression coming out.
lol that's true. is that a problemm?
No way! I prefer that actually. A lady in the streets, but a beast under the sheets.
but can guys handle that?
Girl, you're a virgin for gods sake.
You don't know what you want, you don't know anything about rough sex, you may have watched p*rn or read stuff online, but you don't have a clue yet. So have sex, and then figure out what you want.
i never watched p*rn lol
Then how do you know you want rough sex? Just askin
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What's Your Opinion? Sign Up Now!NO Problem...I would Deffinetly NOT BE AFRAID. but then again that's me.everyone is different and has different expectations & views when it comes to SEX.
I think generally speaking I'm like that with women. It's one of societies major contradictions aimed at men.
In a variety of ways, men have been tough to do things that are the exact opposite of what they really should be doing. We are basically feeding our young boys bullsh*t information, this being one of them. Guys are taught to treat women with respect, be kind, and be gentle. Being rough during sex would seem to go against how we've been raised, to be respectful and gentle when dealing with a girl, however, the majority of women prefer when a man takes charge, is slightly aggressive and or rough.
Basically we teach men to be wussies (which carries over into the bedroom), then both men and women complain when we don't seem to get what we want/were expecting.
I'm a rough lover with a little sadist in me. If I was dating a gal that came across and innocent and cute, I'd tell her up front that I'm an animal in bed and if that's not for her, we shouldn't go there.
EVERYONE has a wild side and it is always cool to expose that in a an adorable/cute girl.
why is that cool? wouldn't it make you feel like she has 2 faces?
it's cool because then she is comfortable around me that she can show me all her ppersonality, even the bits she hides from people. It is very rare to find people truly expose their whole personalities and fantasies to people. I don't think it would come across as being two face. It's like the sweet, cool calm and collected guy with the long fuse will blow if pushed too far.
ok I see...thanks for ansering!
ask away, but you have to know that he will think that you are experienced in this so you can't claim 'never done this before' I think it is best to ease into this slowly unless of course it is just a one time only situation.
lol I'm a virgin...
If she is a thin, short, pleasant, calm, sweet girl who never gets furious, raises her voice, or causes trouble, yes.
Some will, some may not. Asking him isn't going to be a turn off unless he's gay.
no. I decide whether or not to be rough during the event. I always start out slow, but then test my limits. If it seems like she is enjoying it or at least isn't hurting from it, I'll keep pushing the limits.
if a girl asks me to be rough with her before we even start, I'll tell her to just let me know when she can't take anymore, and unleash the beast. If she does tell me she can't take anymore, I'm still going to keep going though. She asked for it.
whats the point of telling you then?
so that I know when to get rougher.
It makes me think that she was raped and doesn't like it rough. If she wasn't raped and she does like it rough (while coming off as innocent) then it just makes me think she's a woman in the street and a freak in the sheet...best kind of girl there is
:D
Yes, you're right, as long as she doesn't ask for more spice!
so its OK to ask?
Of course. Why would it not be OK to ask?
Nothing would change for me. If anything that might make me want to be more rough. Wouldn't matter if she asked me to or not, I'd still go HAM. Though I imagine asking me to would make me go more HAM.
really?? why might it make you more rough?
idk lol. maybe its something like reverse psychology to me. if she's cute, shy and innocent, I'd wanna see if being rough will make her wild of course nothing drastic. I don't wanna sound like a psycho lol it'd still make it enjoyable for the two of us
that sounds perfect! do you usually expect a girl like that to get wild in reaction?
Based on your comments, you don't want rough sex, you just want him to be more in control. That's not rough.
Which is fine.
In terms of your general question, a cute and innocent girl I'd probably start off more gently, but if encouraged to go rough I would. And it might be extra hot, though some part of me would be yelling in the background 'oh god, this is wrong'.
why is it extra hot and why wrong?
Well, if she's really petite, I'm a big guy, I'd already feel like we're on the edge of departing from 'nice sensual lovemaking' to me using her while she 'takes it'. I don't actually mean that in a sense of using her as a person and not necessarily respecting her, I mean it -only- in a sexual way, and to be honest, a lot of people (who like rougher sex) find that kind of thing hot and primal. So yeah, the fact she looks innocent and delicate amplifies how dominant the whole thing seems.
I don't assume that a chick wants it rough. Some people are insanely turned off by that. However, the ones who like it that way, typically don't have a problem saying that they do.
I had a sort of FWB arrangement with a friend a few years back, and she bitched to me that all of her boyfriends would never give it to her rough. I'm sorry, but if I'm banging a chick from behind and she tosses her hair back and tells me to pull it, I'm not going to sit there with a stupid look on my face and just keep on doing what I was doing. Things are going to get rough.
However, there's apparently a good number of guys out there who simply won't do that.
its not that I wanna feel like a whore an have him pull my hair, but I love it when his grip is really firm and he takes control. some guys are just too respectful and distant. its like you have to give them a written permission to touch you. like they put you on a pedestal and try too hard to make a good impression and start to follow you around like a dog. its such a turn off, unfortunately they don't see that.
Honestly, if any girlfriend of mine told me that something as basic and simple as hair pulling would make her feel like a whore, I'd probably treat her as if she was made of glass too. Maybe you haven't specifically said that to any of the guys you've been with, but your attitude in general is probably conveying a similar reaction.
everything that HURTS would remind me of a whore and rape, and pulling hair hurts! but I like stuff like when they grab my hips so hard that I can feel it to my bones, because this doesn't hurt...
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