Does the fact that I've had a female circumcision put you guys off me?

[samanthaDty]

So I'm half Indonesian and half English, I spent the first 6 years of my life in Indonesia which is a Muslim country, all girls and boys get circumcised if they want to be accepted within their community. Shouldn't really be calling it circumcision Because in reality it's fgm (female genital mutilation) its not the same as a male circumcision. I've had half of my clit cut off to 'stabilize my libido' basically I have no sex drive, sex is like a chore for me now. it's supposed to make me not cheat on my future husband, Because if I'm not really into sex why would I go looking for it. But I now live in England and no one I've had sex with has noticed that I'm different but neither did I, I just recently found out myself. I just wanna know how a guy would feel about being in a relationship with someone who can't be satisfied sexually and has no sex drive, also would they still expect things from me (sex, bjs ect.)

[Anonymous]

This is going to be harsh to day even though it doesn't necessarily apply to you directly, but the fact there are countries and places around the world who put these restraints on women, leads me to believe they happened for a reason.

I'm not religious but I still think its symbolic that it was Eve who committed the original sin by taking the apple against gods will, not Adam. The symbolism being that women are flawed gender, less in control of their own minds and emotions. In other words, need to be kept in check.

Even in American stats back this up. Harvard did a study that showed women cheat 30% more than men.

I really don't inherently hate women, I'm just observing the facts that are put before me. In doing so, I am extremely old fashioned in the sense, that I believe women should be somewhat restricted in society, that they must be kept in check by their male counterparts, because mentally, they cannot stand on their own. Generally speaking of course.

[toulouse]

No. You are not_that_ old fashioned. Matriarchy came before Patriarchy.

[Chuck123]

lol I'm sorry but your a dumb ass

[Izzy2102]

and how exactly is female circumsision gonna help there?

[Opinion Owner]

She said that the reason for it is because it keeps the girls from cheating on their husbands later in life. Again, ironically not very far fetched given the countless studies the prove women are far more likely to cheat.

[AJ2293]

No, no she said it's "supposed" to keep girls from cheating not that it actually works. Even assuming it would it's still a barbaric, unecessary procedure that you usually wouldn't someone you love to go through. And obivously it would make sex with her husband unpleaureable too, so less sex for the husband too. Now I guess in many Muslim countries it's considered rape if they're married, but still many hopefully most men wouldn't make her do it

[Izzy2102]

what he said and the last statistic I read implied that 50% of all women cheat and 75% of all men. One thing is for sure though, those statistics can't be trusted

[Opinion Owner]

Ok just because it doesn't work is irrelevant. My point is the fact that they even think they must take such actions speaks about the reason why. Those stats I came up with were form a Harvard study, not just something I made up.

[Izzy2102]

I know about that study, I read it too, but there are so many studies and they all get different results.And the reasons they feel they need to do that is obviously for a bit more complex reasons

[TheUglyOne]

No way, I would never be put off! It's not her fault, most of the time it was done without her consent - in fact at those ages she could even give consent. A lot of guys would be patient and understanding. And in actuality, FGM rarely has removed sex drive from the woman. You might be having emotional trauma from the experience, totally understandable, and that might be keeping your libido away, but hormones are what drive people's libido and for women that are mostly generated in their ovaries. In the end, I think if the guy finds you beautiful, and believe me, anda terlihat cantik, as my many lovely Indonesian friends taught me. I'm sorry you had to go through this. Any decent man, man worthy enough to be with you, would not only not consider this a non-issue, would even help you through this.

[upsyndrome]

But the cliterous doesn't affect sex drive, the brain and hormones being released within the body do? (or am I wrong) so you don't have a sex drive at all? You can't even feel pleasure with penetration? I know the stimulation of the clit, because it's so sensitive, helps reach orgasm but there are other ways besides clit stimulation that do so also. You can reach an orgasm through penetration.. I'm sorry, I just don't understand how this works, and I'm terribly sorry for what happened. :/

[why-makoto-kun]

You poor thing. Don't listen to people who don't understand. Some guys don't have a high sex drive or are just impotent, so maybe you can find one of those.

P.S. you're gorgeous.

[Hyped_up_on_coffee]

I think its horrible that they did that too you and it would be a punishment for most guys if their girl had no sex drive but I'm sure you'll find a nice guy who is't too in to sex

[Distant]

As long as my lady was still willing to perform sexual acts on me / have sex with me despite having no libido, I wouldn't mind. Simply because I want to have sex in a relationship because I DO have a libido. You seem to have type one FGM which is best-case scenario too

[mimikaycool]

I don't think it would be a huge problem in a relationship. It could cause some issues down the road, though. If you got married to a guy (or just started getting intimate) and you didn't have a sex drive, he might feel like he way doing something wrong.

[kheserthorpe]

Libido is an issue.

We could work with what's left, and likely have very pleasureable (perhaps orgasmic) experiences for her.

But the libido thing is an issue.

[JohNfromKolob]

"Shouldn't really be calling it circumcision Because in reality it's fgm (female genital mutilation) its not the same as a male circumcision" soem forms of FGM that only removed the clitoral hood are actuall LESS severe than male circ...in that case...more nerves are removed from the male.

[AJ2293]

My sister was adopted and she had it done too before out parents adopted her. I don't get at all why people do this. I mean no father would want this to be done to his daughter, right?

Well anyways, if you didn't want to have sex with me at all, yo obviously that would be a problem. Sorry if I sound harsh, but I have a sex drive . And it's no fun if she is not into it.

Are you sure you can't get any pleasure? Have you seen a doctor? I don't want to encourage you to take any meds if you're feeling fine, but understand that most men do want to sleep with their girlfriend/wife and we want you to like it too. There may be meds to improve you libido and there may even be recovery surgery.

[G-Daz]

This is one of the reasons I have a major disliking for the ideology of Islam, they want to enforce sharia law throughout the UK and Europe now (we already have sharia courts) and we have ilegal genetical mutilation still happening under the law hidden.

It would be tough but if I was serious with you, I think I could deal with it but wish we could at least occasionally have sex. I am sorry what happened, God bless

[SixStringSeal]

I would love her just the same. It's unfortunate that this sort of thing happens but she would still deserve the best, same as any girl.

A persons minor imperfections are sometimes the biggest things that keep you attracted to them :-)

[TheBattMan]

You should still have a sex drive whether the clitoris is there or not.

[Intactivist500]

You can reverse your circumcision surgically. Unlike us males. But I am tugging to restore my foreskin. Tugging does not work for females though, but yes. Go to a doctor in USA who specialize in vaginas, and you can get your clitoris back.

[simples3]

You should still be able to come and orgasm via your g spot. Just find a guy who knows how to tap that ass right babe. :)

[standardguy]

I would be very disappointed because I love most doing cunnilingus.

[TonyWilliams]

I wouldn't not evaluate a girl on basis of her circumcision (which wasn't even her choice) I would like to be with her

[Seppel]

No but I am sorry for you

[wywynot]

Well it depends. What type of female circ? Have you tried to have it reversed? It wouldn’t be you, it would be could we do it.

[JapTitan]

it's a lie I am from Asia and as far as I know in Indonesia they only do either hoodectomy or little pinprick beside the female circumcision is performed by doctors not by untrained tribal women.

[Mottbiitsa]

"basically I have no sex drive"

I would expect an intense sexual frustration. But I feel sorry for you anyway.

[Anonymous]

that sounds very interesting.

[Anonymous]

i am so sorry.

[Anonymous]

You're not making sense. Your sex drive and sexual stimulation are different. You are talking like a man which makes me question your true gender.

[Anonymous]

you're pretty I would f*** you