Sexual Health
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Older guys prey on young girls?

do you think it's true...i met a guy who is 12 years older than myself and at first he seemed genuine and legit like he was really getting to know me. but then he started saying how he "wants to have fun" and all that crap so I realized he is probably just preying on a young girl for sex. i am not unattractive. he liked my looks and he probably thought he could manipulate me easily because I'm younger and he's also a bossy strong personality on top of the age gap. honestly after a certain age if a guy just wants to get laid by young girls it makes him look lame and immature. approaching mid 30s, I would think he would at least want to settle down in a serious relationship. but "wanting to have fun" with much younger girls just makes him look like a pathetic aging older guy who never grew out of his college stage and moved on in life to things more age appropriate. plus he was even more immature than guys my age sometimes. he would do things once in awhile that made me think "go back to high school" at first I thought he was a cool suave older guy but once he started dropping the "not looking to settle down" sh*t and acting less mature I lost a lot of respect for him and left. what do you think of this situation? is my analysis correct...that if an older man meets a young girl and announces he just wants to have fun he probably is some dude who never wants to settle down and just keeps banging young chicks/is probably immature? not saying all guys need to get married or have a family but past a certain age I would expect most people to want to find a real relationship at the very least. especially mid 30s.
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Most Helpful Girls

  • Older guys prey on young girls?

    In my opinion most guys 'prey' on gals if preying is seeming to have a non sexual interest in a gal and possibly manipulating her.

    What do you think of this situation?

    That you met a guy who was nice to you likely in hopes that he would have sex with you. Probably best suited to think a heterosexual guy past puberty that's not a family member is only being nice to you and getting to know you because he wants to f*ck you as I doubt most guys are nice or try to get to know gals they have no sexual interest in.

    is my analysis correct...that if an older man meets a young girl and announces he just wants to have fun he probably is some dude who never wants to settle down and just keeps banging young chicks/is probably immature?

    I highly doubt your analysis is correct since I think whether a person is immature depends on their personality. As well asI think most guys regardless of their age never want to settle down and just keep baning young chicks.

    "honestly after a certain age if a guy just wants to get laid by young girls it makes him look lame and immature"

    To you it makes him look lame and immature. Different views and most of society tends to think a guy just wanting to get laid by young girls is biologically natural.

    "not saying all guys need to get married or have a family but past a certain age I would expect most people to want to find a real relationship at the very least. especially mid 30s."

    Probably best to not have that expectation as it seems guys dislike relationships and committment and likely it's when they're in their 40s that guys want to find a real relationship.

  • Your basically right , A lot of older guys will take advantage of younger girls because they think they can dominate the situation . They think that younger girls or more naive and they have the chance to be the boss in the relationship , They also think they will listen more than someone their age or older . He basically said he just want to have a good time , He was honest yes. But why was he so direct , Was probably because he thinks he can get an easier lay out of a much younger girl . So I totally agree with you.

Most Helpful Guys

  • First, you need to get it out of your head that he is "preying" on anyone. He was completely up-front about his intentions ("just fun" rather than a relationship), and there's nothing wrong with dating a guy who is 12 years older than you if that's what you want. I completely realize it may not be for you, and that's totally fine, but you are acting like this is in some way WRONG, but it isn't. You are both adults, and if you both CHOOSE to be together, there is nothing wrong with that at all.

    Plenty of girls your age WANT to have relationships with older guys, and plenty of older women want to have relationships with guys your age. And many of them aren't looking for a serious relationship either.

    This guy did the single most important thing: he was honest, open, and up-front about what he was looking for. Obviously, it's not what YOU are looking for, and that's too bad, but at the very least you should respect him for giving you the information you needed to make an informed decision for yourself. Many people, male and female, will lie about what they really want, often to themselves, rather than "lose" a person they like. This guy isn't trying to trick or manipulate you into doing anything, so you have no real reason to judge him, and in fact, what you WANT from a guy you are potentially interested in is HONESTY, so you can figure out of you are compatible with him and have a possible future together.

    Now you know; you two aren't compatible. That's fine, tell him that, and move on with your life. No need to make judgement of his lifestyle beyond the fact that it isn't for you.

    • he wasn't honest. he kept saying different things and lied to me about many things.

    • He was honest enough to tell you he didn't want a relationship. If he lied to you about other things, then, yes, he might have been lying to get you to have sex with him, but plenty of guys do that at any age. The rule is: if a guy is showing you interest at a level above normal, he wants to have sex with you. The only thing that should matter to you is if you like him and if you two want the same things. If not, send him on his way and don't worry about it.

    • he lied to me about where he lived, where he went to school, his Facebook account, and many other things, and he was the type who said whatever he wanted to get his way, through guilt trips and manipulation. and he hid a lot of things from me. wouldn't have me over etc. so I felt like he was trying to manipulate me..both for sex and as a person, like I'm young so he thinks I'm stupid enough to fall for his crap, which I wasn't in the end as I dumped him.

    • Show All

  • There's the thing, some of the older guys are immature and those are the ones you need to be careful about. Some are very mature. I have a friend who's 27 and she's dating a 42 year old. The 42 year old is very mature, however. I say it's not the age that matters (as long as you both are over 18) but rather the maturity of both of you. Of course, if you are just plain not interested, you need to let him know that. And if he has any bit of maturity at all, he will back off when you tell him to. Otherwise seek a restraining order.

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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • Honestly I don't think guys 'prey' on young girls because they think it's easier. It's not. It's easier to get a 35 year old divorced fwb.

    Guys who say they are looking for fun are - just looking for fun. Regardless of your age.

    Women who are young and attractive are attractive to all men, regardless of what they want.

    Guys in their 30's who want to settle down are often pretty happy to do so with a younger woman as well - often She is not ready though.

  • "preying" is such a harsh term.

  • this makes me hate being born male often times

  • I generally don't like the term preying since people cannot help what they are attracted to. Is there behavior that would raise red flags? Sure, but some guys are attracted to younger women. I'm 36 and my girlfriend is 28 but I've ALWAYS liked younger women, no offense to older women but I was never one of those guys who went after older women.

  • I would marry a young girl.

  • Yes it's true that older guys go for younger girls but it's because women like older guys...

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