Husband is asking me to sleep with other men?

My husband has told me he has a fantasy of me meeting and sleeping with other men and he wants me to go for it. I know this is bizarre but has anyone ever been in this situation before? He swears its not so that he can sleep with other girls he says he just likes the visual idea of me with another man and keeps telling me to find a guy flirt with him and sleep with him. I'm not sure if I can go through with it. Anyone at all have any insight on this?
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Most Helpful Guys

  • More than likely he is either looking for an excuse for an open relationship, has a cuckold fantasy, more than likely he also doesn't see a future in you (especially if your indicated age is real)

    Been in this as the 3rd person with 9 couples, I can tell you of the 9 only 2 are still together. Of the 2, one is a couple in their late 40s, she likes the guy to be well endowed and he enjoys seeing his wife enjoy sex, especially with a younger bloke. The other couple, they have a humiliation fantasy, he does everything to get her ready and I penetrate her and do whatever I want after I have put my sperm in her, the moment I withdraw they chase me away and he cleans her out and then "cares" for her. They been doing it for 6 years now and am actually her ex-bf.

    The other, most of it was for his enjoyment and quite often the woman never really wanted to have anything to do with me but they did it to satisfy his fantasy in hope either it could spice up their relationship or save it, some the cuckold isn't really just that, had one where he wanted me to do her because he enjoyed the feeling of "owning" a "slut" , most more than likely would never have dreamt it but saw it in p*rn and decided it was something they must try as well, usually it went rather disastrous. The most recent one, they were a long term couple been together for over 5 years, the thing he got off from it is seeing her in pain and discomfort, he approached me at a swimming pool, asked if I wanted it, she said should would like it too, She loved him a lot and really wanted to save their relationship, but the sole reason he got me to do her was my penis is big and that's the one thing she didn't like, when I asked if she really wanted to do it, her mouth said yes, but every other part of her said no, but she convinced me I should do her. as she wanted to go through it. He was happy when she screamed in pain as I penetrated her and smiled a lot when I pumped her and her eyes showed pain or discomfort, after it was over she was in tears but he just left the room. I tried cuddling her after that trying to console her, she was a victim of rape 8 years ago and it did trigger flashbacks to that incident except she felt that fantasy was even worse than a rape.

    If you really want to do it, then do it but do it for yourself rather than for him. Most of the girls I did this way regretted it and most felt "dirty" after it was over, oh yeah it isn't going to save your relationship.

  • How about you set up a role play something like this: You get all tarted up and go to a bar that you both like but that won't have a lot of your friends around. You go there first and find a place to sit. Look available and let a couple of guys hit on you. He comes in 20-30 minutes later and finds a seat. Then, treating you like a stranger, he is the other man. He picks you up, takes you to a hotel room, and treats you like the wanton slut he's always wanted you to be. I'm hopeful that he'll get his ya-yas and his needs will be largely met without putting the marriage at risk. Let me know what happens.

Most Helpful Girls

  • Maybe your husband has a psychological issue where he feels, subconsciously, that he is not able to perform well enough for you and thus wishes for you to be pleasured by someone who is enough for you. However, asking him, he probably won't say he has an inferiority complex because, in reality, he might not even know he does.

    • I think you're on to something here. That's part of it for me at least. My inferiority complex would be my small size. Although I've been with women who have been unsatisfied with my size it generally hasn't been an issue with them so I have to say it's more psychological on my end.

    • Apparently it's a fairly common fantasy/disorder, however you want to look at it. I learned about it during my psychology class.

  • you could go out to a bar.. have some fun with girlie friends come home and just make up a big sexy story on what COULD have happened :P personally I would never be able to have sex with another man while with my boyfriend.. just seems wrong..

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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • I know someone that did that and she got herpes from the other guy and they're now living with that so if you decide to do it be very careful.

    Personally, I can't understand why a guy would want his wife/gf to be with another guy. I certainly wouldn't, but I know there are guys that think that's exciting.

    My opinion is that unless you're comfortable with it you shouldn't do it.

  • Sounds like your man has a cuckold fantasy.

    • yea I researched that but its different because he doesn't want the humiliation like some guys want and he isn't interested in watching he just wants to know that other men want me and wants to know the details if it does happen

    • Not every cuckold fantasy is the same. This is definitely a cuckold fantasy though.

  • I can't understand why any guy would want his girlfriend/wife to be with another guy, that is just beyond me. I believe if you're with someone it should just be the two and that's it. Period. Nevertheless, what people choose to do is their business. If you don't feel comfortable with the idea, then tell him.

  • I'm in to this actually. Not sure why but it's definitely a turn on for me. I've shared it with a few girls I've dated over the years but have only had two that have done it. We one just gave a blow job and told me about it. The other had sex with other guys several times.

  • i think this is a relatively common fantasy, if your not comfortable with it just let him know

  • It is utterly disrespectful. Whatever he says, he is doing things behind your back or has intentions to do so.

  • This doesn't really sound like a good idea. It may be a hot thought to have you 'wanted' by another guy but when that wears off and he realizes you have slept around on him - he may be singing a different tune.

    I'm not sure this will be the best for the marriage in the long run. Better for him to fantasize about it rather than you actually doing it.

  • This is very wierd. Which husband would want his wife shared with other guys. Please tell him off how disgusting it is. My wife died lately and I have always respected her views and loved her.

  • It could be very hot.

  • I too have asked my wife many times to cuckold me and have gotten no where except one time at a theater during a slow part of the film I leaned over and whispered in her ear "I want you to cuckold me" she responded while still looking straight at the screen, "If you buy me those earrings". I had to grab and kiss her I felt so in love with that I couldn't stand it. Why I felt that way I can't really say but it is true. Anyway I did buy those earrings at a great price and she never cucked me. I do think she is waiting for the perfect candidate. She has hinted at a coworker and I hope it is him. I asked her if she would consider him and she abruptly replied negatively, "He is married" and I said so what. It was silent after that.

  • Cockold fantasy.