Is it OK just to hook up for "practice"?

[Anonymous]

Well see here's my situation. I'm not religious at all but I want to save my virginity until I find a very very special girl. I've had situations to lose it and I actually have a chance coming up tomorrow night. I am extremely inexperienced when it comes to making out and going down on girls... but this Saturday, there's this girl who said she will do anything with me that I'm comfortable doing. I do not like her. I'm not attracted, would not consider a relationship, and don't know her well at all. Would it be bad if I go sorta hook up with her? As in make out a ton, have her go down on me, and I'd go down on her. She knows that I really only want to hook up if anything and that doing this would not lead to dating or a relationship. So is it bad if I do this just to get some practice? This girl is really into me sexually... she says she wants me to spend the whole night and wants to keep going until I come at least 3 times... So thoughts? Should I or shouldn't I? I want to save my virginity for the special girl, but when I find that girl, I don't want to be so inexperienced at pleasuring her that she gets bored...

[kholland65]

First of all, this notion of needing to practice is ludicrous and its perpetuated by the media (movies, TV, etc.). If you've seen a p*rno, then you know enough to do just fine on your first time. Especially since you've stated you have experience with just about everything else, which is half the battle. Not only are you good at those particular things, but your experience with them will help calm your nerves when actually leading to intercourse. It doesn't feel like a giant leap.

That being said, I would only suggest hooking up with this girl (or any girl for that matter), if its understood AND I MEAN REALLY UNDERSTOOD that you have no feelings for her and are doing this purely for sexual reasons. If that is not made 110% clear and again, I mean 110% clear, then it could lead to hurt feelings and drama which is not good at all.

I would also suggest you save your virginity for a serious GF. I know I personally made that choice and I very happy that I did wait to lose my virginity to someone I was committed to and trusted. It made the sex easier, more enjoyable, I had no moral regrets, and it allowed me to continue practicing and having sex. What I and a few other people I know have found is that once you have sex for the first time, its like opening pandoras box. It becomes much harder to go without it once you've been given a taste of how amazing it is. Having sex just once will feel like a tease because you'll immediately be craving more. Best to have a taste test with a full buffet available if you like it, then to have a taste test and the rest of the food gone, leaving you craving more.

[hoodratsk8r]

I think that without experience you will look goofy going down on her she will be thinking what in the hell is he doing.Down there.Experience is definitely a must have.I will give you in depth help.But It might make other people upset friend me and I will send you stuff to help you out so you know what to do do and how to know if you are doing it right.I don't want to offend any young readers and get kicked off the site

[gummybear888]

I think you answered your own question. My fiance is virgin and I'm really happy he made that choice. I told him he should be proud and that I love a lot for who he is. if he wasn't virgin, I would still love him but I appreciate a lot what it means to me and him.

I'm not super religious either, I occasionally go to church, non practicing Catholic myself (was baptized) but I had a crazy family to grow up with. My fiance is religious and obviously he saved it because he wanted to, not due to his religion (he is practicing Catholicism)

so...I really think you should pat yourself on the back and be proud of yourself that you have a good heart and want to save it for the girl you likely are to marry. in the end it's your decision , no one elses.

this girl obviously likes you but if she really really really likes you, she'll respect your borders as well!

take care

[Anonymous]

Ehhh it's a personal line. To me, hooking up to get experience and have a good time is fine and I've done it. But in your case, I'm sorry, it just seems crass since you don't like her and aren't attracted to her. I'd fine someone you at least like and don't feel bad or ashamed about (the way you talk about this girl, it doesn't seem like you have much respect for her or like her enough to not regret it). If you think you can do it with no regrets, go for it. If you have doubts and something like your virginity does mean a lot to you, you might want to think about who you're doing this with a little more.

[Anonymous]

Well oral is a type of sex so you'd already be losing your virginity. But whether or not you agree, you will still be inexperienced when it comes to intercourse. If your special girl is a virgin she will probably have the same concerns about pleasing you. But its no big deal..you guys can learn from each other.

Should you have oral with this girl? Only if you really want to. You said you weren't attracted to her so if she's ugly I'm not sure how much fun it will be. Just do what you want to and be safe. You can still get stds from oral.

[normalice]

well, if she offered to do whatever you are comfortable with, in advance, then she has taken a liking to you. Any form of physical contact with her will make it worse. If you don't want a relationship with her, then don't do it.

[sikoo31]

let her know its just practice.

just don't lie man.

[rockcandy]

I wish more guys were honest like this! That way we know exactly what to expect and aren't fed any b.s.

[sikoo31]

honesty is the best policy.