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Why does sex still hurt after two weeks?

I had sex the first time two weeks ago. It hurt so much I was holding back tears but I expected it so I told him to just keep going and put it in all the way. He was gentle but it hurt so much I started crying and couldn't walk after. The next time (day after) I was so scared of the pain that we couldn't do it missionary. The only way it didn't hurt too much was in doggy style. Just today (two weeks after the first time)+ we tried missionary and he could only get less than half way in before it felt horribly painful. I don't think its his length but his width that hurts me. I've never been in this much pain down there and when I start feeling the pain I clench up so its even worse. Does anyone have any advice to lessen the pain or is this perfectly normal?

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Most Helpful Opinion

  • If your partner is unusually thick, such a sensation is to be expected withe your vagina is being called on to stretch to a size it normally achieves after much more sexual use, whereby vaginal tone is more relaxed and it no longer closes in on itself when not sexually aroused."Unusually thick" is thicker than three average fingers. If you put two fingers inside of you with no problem, while you have this problem with your present partner.

    • Three average fingers!?! I measured for fun the width a few months ago and he is as thick as all 5 of my fingers and he's never put more than one finger inside of me because two would hurt. We done goofed. -.- I guess we should build up by using more fingers?

    • Absolutely.I certainly hope you marry that guy because (1) pretty awesome and (2) over time he's definitely going to put extra mileage on your vag - a penis as wide as five fingers (assuming your fingers aren't very petite) is not far off from double-stuffing in terms of the wear and tear, so hello p*rn p****. If he's the one who caused it he should not depreciate it, but if some other dude inherits it he may jump to unfair assumptions.

    • okay that seriously freaked me out! I just looked it up and measurements are at mid-shaft. I took mine farther down phew! He's only 4 fingers in that case. Double stuffing? This is seriously scary. He and I are in a super long term close relationship. We're in college and he has definitely mentioned working hard to be able to support a family and to be equal with me in terms of education and job security so I think marriage isn't far fetched thank god because I don't want to have a p*rn p****

What Guys Said 5

  • How aroused are you when you are starting?

    • We'd be "fooling around" all day long so I was very aroused.

  • Dont be to hasty to have intercourse to soon, allow yourself to heal before penetration, only this way will you know wether it is to do with sex alone or wether there's another problem. Use lubrication if you must have sex but never ignore what your body is telling you, and the pain is obviously saying something is not right,x

    • But we did wait a whole two weeks and it was just as painful as the first. We do other things but his fingers are obviously not as big as his privates. (sorry if its tmi!) Yeah he won't go too deep since it hurts, good advice. thx!

  • You know, I realize the girls will probably have better answers, but while you are experiencing this pain, maybe you should experiment with yourself, by yourself, with a penis-shaped vibrator or dildo. Use lots of lubrication. Pay attention to whether or not it seems like the muscles that surround the opening of your vagina are getting really tensed up or not. See if you still have this same level of pain using the dildo. It's just an idea. Nobody here on this site wants you to be feeling this much pain.

    • Thanks for the concern! Its very much appreciated :) I'll try that thanks! Not exactly sure where to buy that stuff but I'll look around.

  • Aww sorry. Just take it slower and do it the easiest way which is missionary.

What Girls Said 4

  • You need to try to relax and use a lot of lube. Have him give you a sensual massage and play around for a while, it's normal for a man that is well endowed. My guy and I had to try 5 or 6 times before we could actually have intercoarse.

    • After you had intercourse, was it hard again the next time to do it w/o pain? I'm actually very wet that's not too much of a problem, just it feels like he's trying to separate me from down below! I'll try the sensual massage thing though!

    • Yea at first but it got better after a couple weeks. Even to this day, if we haven't had sex for like a week it's a lot of pressure at first.

  • You need to be relaxed, so you aren't tensing any muscles etc and use lube, even if you were aroused, it still helps. Good luck and I hope it'll stop hurting! :)

  • its normal your too tense and prob try sex before your wet enough how much foreplay do you do...thats the answer...but wow is he that thikk...u,ll learn to enjoy it I'm sure

    • I didn't think he was at first and I looked it up, apparently he is a "grower." I think he more than triples! Its a bit intimidating. I think you're right about the tensing, it hurt so much the first time I'm just scared.

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    • He thinks oral is immoral actually... but he lets me lick haha. Wow you just made me realize...the first time we did it he was only half hard (he had come via handjob less than 15 min before) but after a bit inside of me he became fully hard and then I had to ask him to stop soon after because it hurt so much. Aee I'm unlucky. haha. The thing is he does tease me like crazy and does many things to make me really wet but it doesn't seem to help because the wetter I get...the bigger he gets. lol

    • oh babe you need him to give you oral... i,m taking it that you have never orgasmed? if not sit and make yourself orgasm as he watches..u will be soaking and relaxed and he will be hard...so do you onli lik his not sucjk it til he cums in your mouth...u really shud try thst too..talk to him you can't have sex life full of pain it will break not only your p**** but your relationship

  • Yike wow id say take a week or month break til everything heals.I'm still one but I thought when you're an adult your body develops more and it doesn't hurt!? I'll be at least 19 wen I lose mine or older

    • Lol and I'm 20 haha. Nope it hurts just as much!

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