Sexual Health
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Is Delayed Ejaculation something I should fix?

It takes me about 25-35 minutes to ejaculate during masturbation. During intercourse, it is at the very least 30-45 minutes. Now, this is far from the average sexual experience for me. I most often find myself in multiple hour long sexual sessions with partners previous or current where I rarely finish at all. I've gone as long as 12 hours straight. No I don't take antidepressants, and I masturbate far less than average, less than four times a week. Most girls I have been with have found this as something very enjoyable. Some lack the stamina to continue such sessions, which I understand. However, a few have been outright disappointed that they weren't able to make me finish. I'm currently in a long-term relationship with a girl I love dearly. She loves having sex with me, yet often feels intimidated by the energy required for mutual pleasure to be achieved in the bedroom. Despite the fact that I've told her that I'm OK with not finishing and love to please her anyway, she is concerned. On my end, I love sex. Even without the big climax for me it's a very pleasurable experience where there is a lot to enjoy. I've had many of my past partners tell me that because I'm not focused on finishing, that I'm paying more attention to them and making it better for them. I'm confused as whether or not to consider my condition a good or a bad thing. Is it? Guys, do any of you have similar problems and/or any advice on whether or not to consider it a good/bad thing? If you don't have the problem, do you feel it would be a good/bad thing? Girls, is it important having your man actually finish? How would it affect you being with a man who pleasures you in bed, yet rarely finishes, and never quickly? Is it a positive or negative thing in the bedroom overall?
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Most Helpful Guys

  • Just for the record, I believe the 12 hours bit. One time I went 14-15 hours with a total of maybe 3 ejaculations. (there was some alcohol involved too)

    That's not normal though, but 4-8 hours straight is pretty common. I don't have the same problem as the QA though. If I try I could probably get it done in a few minutes.

    I don't have an answer for the QA. Maybe check with a doctor.

    • Yea, "normal" runs between 4 and 6 hours for me. The doctor said I suffer from delayed ejaculation, and that if I wanted to I could seek treatment for it. I just don't know if I want to.

    • Well it sounds like you are borderline on getting treatment or not. I've never heard anything about the treatment. Is it something temporary that you can just try for a while? If so that might be the way to go. If you are in a long term relationship, maybe it should be a joint decision also.

    • He referred me to a sexual therapist. Which would be expensive. Also I'm definitely going to go over it with my better half before I do anything. Thanks for the advice.

  • Sure, its a problem, its not as big a problem as the reverse, but ideally, you come when you want, period.

    There is some delayed ejaculation discussion on the premature ejaculation forum on pegym. A few guys there have had it. There is enough discussion of it I think they should rename that forum 'ejaculatory control'.

    • I can understand that I guess. Is it something I should seek treatment for?

    • I wouldn't 'seek treatment'. I'd read up on it on useful forums like the one I linked to and start understanding your own responses.

    • Ok. Thank you for your advice and that link. I appreciate it.

Most Helpful Girls

  • Its very important for my man to finish, I feel like the sex isn't over until that happens. I would love a man who lasted that long and I would make sure he came every time even if it took a lot of effort on my end, it doesn't feel right to me to leave you hanging like that even though you say it doesn't matter to you.

  • Sounds like a good thing, overall. If celibacy made it worse, then maybe more sex/masturbation will make it better?

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What Girls & Guys Said

0 1

  • I would say cut out the wanking for a while and see if it helps.

    • Took a year of celibacy. Didn't help at all. In fact, made it worse. I'm not even sure if it is a bad thing.

    • Did you even read the question?

    • I guess not. Sorry. Good luck.

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