Why do some guys always push for sex on the first date???

[AshesVannah]

and how do you say no but still keep the guy wanting to see you again? I've been having this problem, and its caused me to lose the love of my life because all this happened to me before I met him...I've been with quite a few guys, and its all started the same...guy asks me out, he talks sweet, pays for everything on the date, plays his cards right, and next thing I know, he's asking me to go to his house or a back road, and well, the rest is self explanatory..and then they never talk to me again... so guys...why do some of you push for sex so soon? and do you respect a girl more if she says no? and girls...any advice on how to stand up for myself and say no would be great

[archer86]

What kind of guys are you dating? Are they the tall, macho types who are high on themselves? If so, then this will be a very common occurrence which will dull your respect for men. Try men whom you look at everyday and say to yourself, "He's nice but not exactly my type." You might be quite surprised that such men are the best ones for you but were always rejected because of whatever reason: too short, not my racial preference, not rich, etc.

You are an absolute Southern Bell(meaning you are a hottie) which means you will be forever cursed as a sex object. The more attractive the woman, the greater desire for MOST men to jump into your panties. Just how it is. Your age is another factor. At 19, most guys are all about the sex. I was no different at that age. The difference is that I can truly say that if a woman did have sex with me(THE FEW TIMES IT HAPPENED!), I wanted to keep her. How so? Simply because it didn't happen to me often enough for me to treat women like they were just a disposable product once I got my "piece."

I can respect a woman who says no, but I do not respect a Teaser. If you don't want to put out, just don't do it. If he has a problem with that, find someone else. Waiting is ok, but don't wait too long.

Try guys who are a bit older, say 4 or 5 years older. Guys my age are too old...unless you just want a sex-fling which you obviously do not want. In many cases, older men have their heads together but not always.

Best of wishes to you. WHY AM I SO DAMNED OLD?!?

[TheDigitalSaint]

I only respect girls that say NO. Yes doesn't take any effort.

You are mistaken about one thing. The love of your life never forces you to do something that goes against your morals. A lot of guys think you "owe" them sex for being nice to you. Please! Your body is your own, not some boy that wants inside of your pants.

Now, as a guy, I'll be completely honest. Any girl that I find attractive, of course I'd like to jump in bed with her! That being said, personally, I'm waiting till marriage. I recommend you look over all the broken-hearted girls posting pregnancy questions, STD questions and the like because they slept with boys that pushed them into bed. Talk about real pain and hurt!

Just because it is easier for a boy to be immature instead of self-restraining doesn't mean that there aren't quality guys out there. I recommend you try finding new guys with similar moral stances as yours at a church or similar venue where they will be more likely to stop looking at your body only for sex.

Stand your ground. My father once told my sister the following:

The word "no" has only two letters while "yes" has three. Which one is easier to say? No means no. You don't need to explain yourself. Self-respect is very sexy. I hope to marry a girl like you someday who thinks along your lines. ;)

[The-lady-]

Oe thing is to enjoy sex and other is to jump to bed with them after the first date. Yes there are time a guys is just a hot body and a pretty face and you just want to sleep with him and then feel glad he never show his face again because it was just sex. Some guys push for sex on the first date on purpose some is just their nature, but here is the if you like the guy and there is some possibility of a future relationship, have some self control, tease him, kiss him and send him home wanting more. Self respect is also a big aspect! There are guys who just want sex and if you are tired of that then, just say no and walk away from them.Trust me you will feel better in the morning.

[Unreallover]

i have the same problem there. it gets really annoying after awhile! even tho I love sex, I can wait so why can't they?! but it just seems so hard to find someone, because its basically just a guessing game whether they want a serious relationship or not. (which is what I'm looking for) wish I had advice to give you but I need some myself!

[loddo]

stop worrying about it. do whatever you want to do. if the guy likes you he will still like you without sex. its not complicated.

[Petertheniceguy]

loddo is right.. do what you want.. don't take any bull from guys who don't respect women. There are plenty of guys that will wait till you are in a serious relationship to even consider sex. The next time it happens, just don't give in. Many women don't realize just how much power they have. Oh, and carry a can of mace, or a pocket knife.

[rdxhai]

We push for it because we want it, and think/hope they want it too. I would like to think most guys respect a girls decision not too. I do anyways. But I find myself not being like "most guys".

[Anonymous]

cause its more of like a accomplishment for a guy

like a guy who takes a girls virginity who says she's waiting for the "ONE" or marriage

cause its saying yea ur good enough

yea ur "hot" enough

yea ur confident enough

and all the other things

[Opinion Owner]

And probably after he gets sex he'll drop you but sometimes I haven't used sex but I used like send me a dirty picture or something like that and I wanna see if she will send it or not cause I wanna see if she will give in to peer pressure but saying no is sexy as well