I enjoyed being sexual abused?

Some months ago something happened to me, which would be traumatic for normal girl I think..

3 boys took off my bra and pants and they were touching me in this places , also laughing while this happened.

I was of course screaming and tried to hit them but in reality I really liked it , this situation turned me on a lot , I was all wet and sometimes I fantasise about this what happened..

I don't know why it made me so aroused, while normally I should hate them and feel and about this what happened.

Something must be really wrong with me, right? am I even normal?


Most Helpful Guy

  • It's normal and not normal.

    It's normal for lots of girls to have fantasies along the lines of being abused and or raped. Maybe not always to that extreme though. Just look at 50 shades of gray and its popularity. There is a reason for that.

    Women like to be dominated. They like the idea of a guy finding them so attractive, that he just can't resist sexually ravaging her even sometimes outside of her explicit consent. In other words, one of the biggest turn offs a guy can do it actually out right ask "would you like to have sex". To a girl that's not dominant (it actually puts her in the dominant decisions making role.

    Obviously you can see how this sends mixed signals to guys, because basically what you want us to do can land us in jail, if we guess wrong and think you are attracted to us and horny, when in reality your not. Now I'm not condoning rape, nor am I suggesting that us guys want to have non-consensual sex, but we simply just don't. What I'm simply saying, is there is a fine line between what women want and what they don't. So its very easy to slip into the wrong zone where things get messy and now your sitting in a court room, or at the very least, have been shamed as being a jerk and pervert. I think its for this same reason, that some men, don't take rape seriously. They feel like some women talk out of both sides of their mouth on the issue so they are confused.

    Obviously what happened to you is wrong and you really shouldn't have liked it. Fantasizing about it is one thing, so is acting out the scenario in a controlled environment (obviously its not 100% the same since its consensual), but having someone violate you without consent is completely wrong. It's like BDSM. Obviously being sexually abused is bad, but people who practice BDSM, do it under a consensual context as well as set strict rules and guild lines about what they will allow so that everyone has not only an enjoyable experience, but a safe.

    Personally though, I find that people who enjoy the idea of abuse, usually have underlying psychological problems that led to the fantasy, because obviously the idea of abuse should not be sought after by a human.


What Guys Said 12

  • well you have a fetish. Fetishes are normal as to whether or not your fetish is normal is really beyond anyone's judgement.

    I think it is a dangerous fetish to have though. It may be fine to fantasize and if you can find a partner who can respectfully fulfill your desire that is good btu it could lead you into potentially dangerous situations.

    But to your specific question. I wouldn't say there is something wrong with you, that's not my place to judge. And as far as are you normal, what is normal really? As long as you aren't doing crazy stuff to fulfill this fetish I think it is perfectly fine one to have

  • I don't think it's that odd for you to have responded with sexual arousal.

    A lot of women and men find the idea of being forced arousing. Just because it actually happened to you doesn't mean you're not allowed to be turned on by it any more.

    You can hate them AND have been aroused as well if you feel that way.

    • In case anyone is confused by this - it doesn't make what they did okay.

      Arousal is not consent.

  • I would just like to add as blanketed statement, added to my answer.

    For those who claim its completely fine that she had non-consensual sex, simply because she enjoyed it, fair enough you are entitled to your opinion, but then do you understand why this so called rape culture exists and why many men, don't take women seriously who claim to have been raped or against rape?

    We are essentially sending the message that its not rape if they enjoyed it. Even if that is the message we intend to send, and its the message the abused agree with, then again, you can see how rape won't get taken seriously.

    It's like saying I don't mind murder as long as I don't like the person. Obviously that sets a bad president and isn't doing any favors in stopping the criminal act.

  • 1. NO - it's perfectly normal and a lifestyle that you realized you indulge in. Nothing wrong with you there. A lot of women as well as men love being forced, humiliated and/or abused as it turns them on - degrees vary

    2. Just ensure you understand what's said above, don't publicize it (cause there will be times and places where you don't want this to happen), whenever possible indulge in this in controlled environment :)

  • It sounds more like rape to me. That you found it arousing could mean that you liked being forced to do it, if it's normal I wouldn't know. Have you tired to get some help and counseling by a professional sexual counselor ? she/he would be much more help then any one of us.

  • Did you report it?

  • Nope. You're normal. You have had an orgy with some d/s overtones. Check into SM literature and find your local resources. "Forced" sex is really popular fantasy with women and there are a lot of women looking for it.. It is possible to have an enjoyable nonconsentual experience, it just doesn't generally work that way. So relax and just appreciate that you lucked out. They weren't trying to make you feel good, it just worked out that way.

  • You're absolutely right. Arousal is not consent !

    There is something in our brains that triggers a domineering factor of being controlled that most are hard wired to either obey and or revolt. We grow up being nurtured and taken care of and when all the sudden we are leavt to our own devises. Our concept of that eagerness to be nurtured gets skewed.

    Particularly girls are treated and looked after protected from birth until rebellion (and or teenage).

    When that ends a certain missing concept comes about and that eagerness to be under some sort of authority figure. hence "Daddy Issues" and liking it rough during sexual arousal by force is a turn on.

    Not to mention the body's hard wired arousal spots being fornicated.

    By no means is this every case and or even your experience but with every women that I talked to that liked being dominated sexually, did mention of missing that caretaking feeling.

    So normal I'd say yes, because you are not condoning that sick and revolting act those three criminals displaced upon your body and mind.

  • Well...

    It's certainly better being this way you are instead of becoming a complete wreck tormented by eternal depression

  • i'm mostly a gay bottom and, its normal for me. I let strangers touch me slap me tie me up and let them have their way with me, usually it hurts but it gets me so hot! I love them for it! its just normal and theirs nother the matter with you!

  • It's normal. It must be always your fantasy to be sexually abused against your will.


What Girls Said 7

  • I sure wouldn't say this is the norm for sure, but if in the back of your mind these kinds of things are thoughts you have, well just have fun with it.

  • I was.. abused.

    I was coerced to do things I didn't really want to do, with guys I didn't want to do them with...

    Some things, made me hate myself...

    Some things, I enjoyed..

    Sometimes, I liked the attention..

    The longer it went on, the less it bothered me...

    When I finally broke up with the guy that was sharing me with his friends...

    Much of the behavior , stayed with me.

  • Its not normal to like being sexually abused. You have some internal issues you need to work on and discuss. You can have a fantasy of having someone taking advantage of you and play it out with someone you are dating but not enjoy it when it happens to you in real life.

  • This is NOT NORMAL. I don't care what others are saying. Those guys abused you against your will. That's illegal and wrong. You should not like something like that.

    Liking to be dominated and fake abused is one thing, but that should be a safe role play between consenting partners. This is a normal fetish.

    There's a difference between what happened to you and the fetish of being dominated and abused.

  • I think what they did was really wrong. But I would think that the part that you enjoyed could most likely be linked with your fantasy. Meaning that you might have a forced fantasy. So I don't think its wrong that you are aroused or enjoyed some part of it, but it was really wrong of the 3 of them to disrespect your decision. God bless and I hope you get over the nasty part of the experience, and protect yourself! Good luck.

  • Maybe You Were Attrached To Them Already. And Fantasized Sex With Them. But Probably Nog This Way You Are Probably Very Confused Like I am.

  • I disagree. this is not normal.

    its absolutely disgusting for anyone to suggest that being sexually molested is a f***ing "lifestyle" like the guy above said. please go kill yourself now and do the world a favor if you believe that. unless you chose to have this experience, you did not make a lifestyle choice. you were sexually assaulted. you're just an odd case who enjoyed it, if you are telling the truth.

    • Shaming the victim is not helpful. She is aware she was assaulted and that the boys were out of line. Telling that her response to the situation is disgusting implies that she brought it on herself. That is unkind. Implying that she is lying about it also shaming. Please desist.

    • no sweetheart. I'm not talking about the victim, I'm talking about some of the men who responded to this question.