How to tell my guy I want him to dominate/rape me during roleplay.

I have been wanting my guy to to this for ages. We have steamy sex, and it can get rough, but how do I tell him I want to role play rape? I know it sounds weird, but I have a always wanted to do this. I want him to do unspeakable tings to me. So how do I tell him I want to have such extreme sex?

Updates:
I am not into painful sex!
I am just into the whole blindfolding, and hand cuffing. I just like it when a guy can to dirty things to me, where I can not do anything to make him stop.
 

What's Your Opinion?

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Most Helpful Opinion

  • You do have to understand that rape is something men are constantly reminded is horrible. It's something we are taught is very very very f***ed up. Just the idea of raping someone you care for is really really uncomfortable, so he's got to know it's something you really want him to do for you. You also need to tell him it's not a masochism thing it's a submission thing, you want to be dominated not hurt, so you should make that clear before any raping begins between you two or you could literally suffer the consequences.To get him to do it to you, just ask him. Get a few beers in the both of you, and give him a giftwrapped box with handcuffs inside. Say "Look I already paid good money for these so they're going to have to get broken in."So basically the stuff he needs to hear is:1)This is a big fantasy for you, you'll love it no matter how it goes2)You want to be dominated not beaten3)You want him to do whatever he wants to youIf you plan on fighting back or something as part of it he's going to need to know too. Same thing if you plan on saying no or stop during the whole thing.Also you gotta be aware when you tell a guy "Do whatever you want to me" that they just might and guys are a lot more creative about doing stuff to you than you are, trust me. Be ready is all I'm saying, if he's into anal porn and you don't like the idea, you might want to clear that up or he'll go for it after you say something like that.If he still doesn't want to do it, offer to trade fantasies. You'll do whatever for him if he does this for you. Tell him you'd remember him for the rest of your life if he made this dream come true for you.

    • Another thing: you're obviously shy about telling him this. Think of it this way: "I want you to tie me up and do whatever you want to me." is literally something guys only hear in a porno. He's going to f***ing love hearing it, you can rest assured girl

    • I don't want to be beaten! I just want to be dominaed. I guess I shouldnt have used rape I suppose in the box

What Guys Said 19

  • Best way? Just tell him. Pretty straightforward.

  • It's really straightforward, you just tell him exactly how you feel. No need to stress over it.If the thought of telling him flat-out what your desires are is scary then you need to work things out by yourself. Examine the issue front-to-back. You're not trying to reach any conclusions, you just want to expand on the idea from every possible angle. If you're still not comfortable talking to him about it, then maybe it's something that will disappear in due course.

  • First of all you have a lucky boyfriend, and second of all just break out all the props one day (handcuffs, blindfold, etc..) and tell him to fack the sh*t out of you ...that should give him an idea ;)

  • Lol.You need to date someone who's sadistic by nature since you're obviously a masochist.Allot of people don't get turned on from hurting someone; I myself wouldn't be able to get hard if I were to try to rape my girlfriend. Pain and sex just don't combine in my mind lol.You're boyfriend probably is kind off a sadist though.I don't know much about this world but I do suggest you to Google those terms and knowing the internet you'll probably find a good guide about "how to turn my Boyfriend into a sadist" lol.

    • I am not into painful sex fyi. I don't like it when guys slap me around. how ever I do like tugging of hair. I do not enjoy pain! I just enjoy relly rough sex. fun and safe.

    • Show Older
    • I suppose ;P

    • Well, you can still role play rape (play out the theme) without it ACTUALLY being rape. He can catch you off guard at home, or have it planned to be hiding somewhere in the house, and you just go along with it. As long as you're not too loud. The last thing you need is the neighbors calling the cops thinking you really are being attacted!I'm kinda glad that there's some other women out there that have a more aggressive view on bedroom romps. O;)

  • You might want to direct him to websites that give instruction on how to be a dom. A good dom actually has to work very hard at it, as the sub is the one actually in control so for it to be good for both of them the dom needs to be able to know the sub's limits. First thing, though, is you need to come up with a safety word so your boyfriend can feel more comfortable with how far he can go.

  • tell him what you want, craft up a safety word and over time it'll be just as you expected

  • I wish you were my girlfriend first off now for advice watch a movie (not a porno) but a movie with it and hint that its a fantasy of yoursmaybe he'll take the bait

  • This is common, its about being dominated, not hurt. Most men would be turned on by this, if they are like the guy you have now into kinky sex.

  • A few others have eluded to this. I know there are a number of us have these secret closet desires to simulate a sexual situation with our women, but know that it is such a taboo topic. If you are married to the woman, at least you know you don't have to worry about her crying rape to the cops the next day. A couple suggestions I can give you to help. 1. Make sure you have a trusting relationship wth your man. 2. Teach by example. By the cuffs and the blindfold and one night when he walks in the bedroom, push him on the bed and tie him up. Put him at you mercy and do as many naughty things as you think he will allow. If he responds well to the actions...well...call dibs for next time. If it were me...she would probably find herself tied to the bed the next morning.3. There are a lot of great sex catalogs out there with pictures of toys and restraints in them. Order one through the mail, and then invite him to look through it with you. Point out the things that you are interested in coyly and see how he reacts. If you point to bondage gear and he gets a hard on...you are probably set to go. It is a good environment to share each of your desires with each other. You might even learn a few things about him, and chances are that you will both get heated up from looking at the catalog. 4. Just tell him what you want. Straight out or in a sexy seductive way. Create a secret fantasy night where each of you gets to tell the other one what kind of fantasy they want fulfilled, and it is the job of the partner to fulfill it. Good luck...love the fantasy.

  • Well it all depends on the guy.But if you really want him to while your having sex find a position in wich you can look straight into his eyes such as missionary, put you arms around him, start slithering licking and sucking his neck and then eventually progress to soft biting, if he's bothered by it wait a little bit longer, but if he isn't then start progressing upwards to his ear and tell him everything you want him to do to you. That's at least what my ex girlfriend did to me and it turned out to be quite the night.But like I said it all depends on the guy.

  • First off the guy has to be able to be dominant. Most men are dominant, but some aren't.Second, the guy has to be able to differentiate between you actually wanting to stop when you say "stop" or "no", and when it's just apart of the role play.What you have to do is make your desires, and intentions clear. Don't pussyfoot around the subject, just come out and say you are into the idea of being raped, and wish for your guy to attempt it. Do this before sex, have a long discussion(if it turns out to be long) before hand, so he knows what you want. Communication is key in any relationship.BUT the most important thing is this! A safe word! Come up with a word when said he will stop. It can be anything but should be well recognized. You need a safe word, to say that you need to stop.Also if you are into bondage, esp tied up you need scissors in the room at all times! As a safety precaution. If the ropes get too tight, you need a quick way to get them off, or you could die. The best scissors are surgical ones, they are angled and cost about 7-8 USD.Also tell him what you like. Like you like the idea of being helpless, but don't like painful sex. Again communication is KEY!Hope this helps.

  • Just tell him, he's probably into it to!

  • Just tell him. Really you have to be honest in a relationship. I would like my girl to open up and tell me what she likes the most sexually.

    • Well I get the feeling that he is into it. we both can be really kinky, but role playing a rape, is different. I mean its not like I want him to beat me up, I just like the idea of him taking control, and doing what he wants to me. I am open to anything, but sometimes its hard for me to open up to him, and what I want. =)I would love for him just to walk in the room and "rape" me. only if it is safe

    • Well try to bring up the subject in a joking way while you and him are starting your sexual activity.. maybe you can say like ''pretend you're going to rape me'' in a joking way and he will probably like the idea! I would like.. kinky is good ahah

  • i love to dominate my girl! most men do. why don't you just ask him? that would be the easiest way.

  • Well there's an assload of answers that I didn't read so what I'm about to say has most likely already been covered in every way humanly possible. Yet I don't care so I'm going to say something anyways. Not that I have any personal experience but I do plenty of theorizing and that's got to count for something. Try getting a pair of cuffs then before sex (before he enters the room) get nude (or if you like the whole rending of clothing then only partially) cuff yourself and when he enters the room start acting vulnerable in a sexy kind of way. Or start struggling and roleplaying the restrained captive. Hope that helped :)

  • there are shy nice guys, and there are assholesa gentleman does not want to harm women but spoil emI advise finding an asshole to date, you'll get yer wish.

    • Dude. It's a fantasy. Are you stupid or something?

    • I agree obviously being dominated is something that she has fantasys about so what

  • either tell him or do this and that what I learn in my lifeDuring foleplay, show some sign of struggle, try to push him away and you getback at itat this point I think he get the idea what happening and he'll start acting alongas things get heat up and he is inside youmoan from top of your lung it really get the guys up

  • tell him straight up that you would like to try it like that some time, he'll probably like that idea and will be up for it, unless he's kinda shy in bed already, then he might not like it as much but its good for him to try it if he is shy because it will make him open up to taking control more often

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  • i wish you were my girlfriend lol. it is kinda weird but you gotta admit, it can be over the top HOT and Fun :)

    • Just tell him before hand NOT before having sex... rape is a touchy issue and if he's not up to it.. then you might ruin the mood so don't talk right before sex... anyway, just tell him what's acceptable, have a safe word lol, umm but you must MUST tell him straightup what you want and let him understand what you want, if he loves you he'll understand and if he really loves u, he will rape you. ;)

    • Haha thanks. Damn right he better rape me. I don't know it just seems so exciting. He has said things, like he wants to throw me down hard, tie me up, and blindfold me. Once I was handcuffed, but he didn't pin my hands down. I really WANT to be Dominated!!!!

    • Tell him EXACTLY that and your wish is your command :)

What Girls Said 23

  • Just tell him what you want, chances are, he's fantasized about it too but was too afraid to ask for it.

  • just tell him how much this would please you. I know this is something I am looking forward to. and my partner knows about it and absolutely loves the idea. so go for it. guys in general like to be dominant in bed, so this would just be another exciting experience for the both of you. :)

  • just be straight foward. guys usually like when you tell them that and they go absolutely crazy with role play. I've always had that fantasy too but I haven't found the right person to do it with.

  • So...er... Bondage?That sounds a hell of a lot better than saying "I want him to rape me." Rape is unwilling... But if you want him to preform bondage, that involves handcuffs, total domination, without all the bad "You have no choice in the matter, and what I'm doing is not only illegal, but morally wrong."So... Just come out and tell him you want to do a little bondage.

  • Just tell him nicely, that you have sexual a fantasy. Forwarn him that it is a kinky fetish you have. Ask him if he wants to know. If he says yes- Tell him again, "that its very nasty". Explain it to him. He'll probably want to; but maybe not. If he agrees to try it, make sure you have a mutual agreement that when you tell him to stop, that he definately will. For me, its so much fun; I love it! After we had done this several times, later on he tied me up spread eagled in stirrups. He then brough in a machine. Its what is called a "fu_ _ing macine". He hooked it up with a huge long dildo & started it up slowly. He steadily increased the speed all the way up to high. That thing was like a jack hammer inside of me- WOW! I thought it was going to tear my vagina apart. The feeling was so big & I felt so filled up I know I orgasmed at least 10 times. I was sore the next day, but it was definately well worth it! I don't remember how long he had that monster inside of me, pounding & pounding inside of me. I finally passed out exausted.

  • ****Try blindfolding him first, and asking him to blindfold you for round two. Take turns being in charge. Women in today's society are so caught up in juggling everything, from work school and kids, we are biologically programmed to take charge and plan things. The fantasy of not being in control is a very normal one for most women today. It allows us to focus on the moment instead of thinking about other things during intimacy.

  • Maybe you should just tell him. It would be total turn on to be rape f*cked by my boyfriend =P I thought it was just me. I give him hints like I tell him, I love it when he's angry, and when he curses at me. So like if we ever get in an argument, it will most likely be a f*ck match. I'm telling it raw lol =] But, straight forward is always the best way!

  • just bring the blindfold and cuffs and be like "how abt we try this tonight" and wink at him. He will go along with it don't worry. It is not too weird and crazy, a lot of people have these type of fantasies .

  • maybe you should push away a tiny bit and make him get frustrated so he'll get mad and then do that to you.

  • now I have a sister..try this if if it works if it doesn't then try something else..get him in the mood..if I wanted this bad I watch videos of that type,he comes over and look what I was watching,i put on face that I really love what they're doing like I'm horny about it,he'l see it..sometimes if he's not in the mood for it he want to see something else but be patient,next time do it again same kind of video,same thing more times until he gets the idea that you really is into that stuff.doing that didn't work right away it took a little while so I moved to different thing..i cufd him even if he said no I forced it,i tied both his legs down and just suck him and f*** like no nomorrow the whole time he was saying stop I didn't stop do not stop,and of corz you would know if they really want you to stop,you can see anger its different when they say no but pleasured face just like us girls..so I did it until he cums right? then after I had a little laugh,he told you crazy?i said god I love it so much can I do we do it again and he he just went and did the same thing to me it was awesoome actually it turned out the way I wanted it,he was all hyped up making me his bitch for the night..the point is do to him the things you want him to do to you..it is self explainatory,and very very good hint for him..no need to talk about what you are going to do,the more natural the more fun,cuz the thing is if you started planning what to do you get soo conscious and it doesn't feel natural,and mind me not everyone likes to act on having sex.i dont,i feel awkward..now its been easier..i just put on an apron in bed and he knows I want to be a maid tonight like that thing..good luck..

  • I don't think you're a "sadist" or you need an ass hole boyfriend. It's not like you're asking him to give you a black eye while having sex. I know what you mean, I would love to be tied up and dominated. Maybe you should do it first, show him what you like, and just start slowly. To get my guy to tie me up and blindfold me I did it to him first. I used my panties to tie his hands together and hooked them to the bed post. Then I put my shirt over his eyes so he couldn't see, and before I got on top of him I teased the hell out of him. After I told him, "next time it's your turn to tie me up and have your way with me." And he did. Tell him after he gets you all tied up to do whatever he wants to you, however he wants. I am sure he has fantasies too and you sharing yours with him is a fabulous way to keep the relationship open and exciting at the same time. If you share your fantasies maybe he'll share his and it'll always just get better and better.

    • Thanks 4 the advice. the guys were making me feel insane.I have had bad guys in the past, and believe me I don't want a black eye at all.

    • You're not insane. I just don't think they got it. I think they thought you wanted like an actual rape with him hitting you and hurting you and making you feel used.

  • Well if you guys already have steamy sex ;)...im sure hell def be into it. Just explain exactly what you want him to do, like tieing you up? or handcuffing you...just tell him what you want him to do! And he'll love it...im sure most guys dream of having a girl that's into kinky sex. Just because I am and my now ex boyfriend loved it

  • just tell him that that is what you want and I'm sure he'll comply. if he's a good boyfriend , he'll do what need to be doneto please you

  • If he's anything like my boyfriend he'll surprise you by how much he gets into it once he knows that I want it. There was no hint of this when we first started dating, but he's become totally dominant in bed. It's awesome. He's so creative with it. I never know what's coming. He's always taking me and saying things and making me me do things that I'd thought would just be a fantasy. He's so forceful and sexy and he's even gotten okay with me telling him no or that I don't want to, and then making me do it anyway.

  • i no exactly what you mean! don't listen to these guys, there's nothing wrong with you, its ROLEPLAY, its not like you would actaully get turned on by being raped if some random guy did, its your boyfriend who you are attracted to and are in a relationship with...what person whos sexually attracted by their boyfriend wouldn't want them to take control sometimes! why don't you try it on him?...like next time your hooking up say in a flirty way "want me to do unspeakable things to you" and more likely then not he'll say what, and you sayd "well you'll find out" and then start doing your thing, more likley then not he will reciprocate if he's into that kind of stuff

  • Tell him you want him to come over one day and just dominate you. Tell him you would fnd it so hot if he ravished you while you pretended to fight his advances.

  • I've always wanted that too, only I couldn't find the words to tell my ex when we were dating.

  • i feel similar I want to come home be shoved up against the wall (I do like some pain) told there is nothing I can do about what's going to happen and be taken really really rough when I self pleasure I can't come unless I imagaine a situation that is basically rape its sick but nothing else normally works

    • Omg, when I self pleasure myself, that's what I think about! I don't think its sick. I think you and I really just enjoy rough sex. I am seeing my boyfriend for the first time in two weeks. he has been away on buisness!But I think I may text him and say that I want to be shoved up against a wall, and stage a rape... I don't want to be raped in real life, but its my fav fantasy. As for pain, I don't mind it. I have to admit, I kind of like pain. But for the people who think I am into sadistic

    • Sadistic stuff, I am not. like I don't want to be cut/stabbed, etc. Its just the idea of being completly taken advantage of trills me. I don't think I am weird. I just think I am really sexual!

  • I love this fantasy idea too. My man and I have talked about fantasies many times but unfortunately every time I mention this rape fantasy he doesn't care for it. I would just start talking about fantasies with him and mention it ask him what he thinks of it. Good luck!

  • jus tell him!guys are mostly up for stuff like that unless they're softies soo I don't know jus try and see what he says.

  • Tell him you want it really rough. Just tell him what you like, everything that you wrote hear. I'm sure he'll be up for it. He's a guy, not being stereotypical but w/e! he has probably thought the same fantasies or worse

  • OMG I know exactly what you mean. Not RAPE because that isn't something to dream about, but there is nothing hotter than a dominating guy. I want to know the same thing. I tried the blindfold and handcuffs with my boyfriend and he just giggled and is so not that type of guy. Although I think most guys would get the hint with the handcuffs and blindfold.

  • what can be so unspeakable that dies not hurt?i think you mean you want to be tied up so that you let him do everything...its not acting rape...in rape people have no choice & they are terrified & degraded & fear for there lives, they have sometimes irreversible damage sometimes cannot have children & find it difficult t trust anyone feel totally disgusted with themselves..people actually DO get raped & its pretty reprehensible for other people to cal playing the real thing..they have done studies & what you are doing by ;putting rape in a hit sexy light is called positive reinforcement , which means you are making it see normal & gratifying which increases the amount of actual rape committed in real grownup life--u could be a casualty one day- grow up.

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