Sexual Health
+1 y

Is it a deal breaker if your girlfriend doesn't know how to give good head?

I am not very experienced with heads.. I only gave them to my boyfriend and I don't think that I do them the way I should .. though he comes every time and he seems happy. Anyway today, I just ate before I met him and when I tried giving him, I was really close to vomit, I tried to ignore it but then he started to really get in the mood and kept moving his penis up into my mouth.. he was just about to come when I got up and couldn't continue , I knew I was gonna vomit so I stopped. I apologized and told him that I really wanted to do it, but I don't know what happened..he seemed fine, told me not to worry, he loves me and its enough that we were together.. it doesn't matter that I don't know how to give head.. that last thing really hurt me, I don't want him to see me as someone who doesn't know how to do it .. it's just that my mouth is incredibly small, and I gag fast :S what do you guys think ? also what can I do to improve this and not gag so much ? thanks
0 0

Most Helpful Guys

  • Enthusiasm > skill

    Quite frankly, I'm a dude, I can almost always have an orgasm regardless of the circumstances. She could practically be giving me a handjob with sandpaper and I'd still get off...ok not really, but you get the point of my sarcasm.

    Personally I also find that its next to impossible for a girl to be completely useless when it comes to BJ's. Yeah I can admit that some girls I've been with have been a bit better than others, but the difference was rather negligible. Even the worst girl still provided me with an enjoyable experience as well as an orgasm.

    To more directly address your question, your near vomit episode wouldn't be a big deal to me if you explained what happened. Obviously stopping right before I'm about to come isn't going to make me happy, but if your reason was that you were sick and felt like you were about to vomit, I would definitely cut you some slack. I'd probably be glad you stopped.

    If you can't go deep without gagging that's not a bid deal. The truth is, the main sensations we get come from the end of our penis. The most sensitive spot that is responsible for our orgasm is the spot on the underside of the penis right where the head connects to the shaft. It almost looks like a line of skin stretching from the pee whole, down to the flap of skin where the foreskin was connected (assuming he's been circumcised). So as long as you can cover the first inch or so with your mouth you should be good. The main reason some guys like to be "deep throated" is simply because they enjoy the sensation of your mouth completely engulfing their penis but it really doesn't feel much different than if you were to put your finger entirely in your mouth, because the lower shaft of our penis has next to no sensitivity (in the sexual sense). There is no stimulation on the shaft of our penis like there is near the tip.

    • So if a guy DOESN'T come during sex..what does that mean? Because you're saying "as a guy you always come" O.o

    • Well this is just me. I do have a some friends who claim to have a hard time cumming with some women. I personally think they are crazy since its not a problem of mine. One of them claims its because he masturbates too much which can very easily be the case. Some men its because of insecurities and nervousness. The point is that 9x out of 10 its rarely the girls fault.

    • Personally, if a guy had problems orgasming, my first guess every time would be that they masturbate too much. The more a guy masturbates/has sex, the less sensitive he becomes. Most guys need a day or 2 at least to reset this, and usually once a day or more is enough to start this effect which will typically only get worse as long as they continue to masturbate/have sex frequently. Obviously it depends on the person and variety of factors.

  • Nope, as long as she's just willing to do it occasionally, I'm good.

    As for you, since you have a small mouth and poor gag reflex supression, tips follow.

    1. Focus more on the head.

    2. You can slide the skin of his shaft up and down while you focus on the head.

    3. When you are doing the basic "push-pull" sucking motion, put your hand around his member, to limit how far into your mouth it can go. Again, slide the skin with your hand while doing this, and it'll feel to him like you're going much deeper than you are.

    4. Tonguework matters, so tease him with it.

    5. Cradle the balls a bit (don't squeeze them much) - it feels great.

    Sometimes we get a little carried away during, so just make sure he knows you have a bad gag reflex, so he doesn't try to shove it in farther than you want it. You instantly become awesome at it if you swallow, by the way. Not even kidding, swallowing instantly makes up for any lack of technique.

Most Helpful Girls

  • Don't stress about it - just read up on techniques in magazines or online, he'll be totally impressed at the new things you're doing :) As for him thrusting too much, a) have him lie down on his back and you bend over him so he can't thrust as much compared with standing, and b) learn how to use your hand/s at the same time so he gets a great sensation all the way along his p*nis but doesn't have to go as far in your mouth.

  • He's right, don't worry! He likes it or he wouldn't come or thrust when you were doing it. If you're concerned try asking him what you could do to improve, if anything. Also, try to relax your throat. It helps :)

  • It os easy to improve and watch p*rn or look up tips.Pratice makes perfect.

Scroll Down to Read Other Opinions

What's Your Opinion? Sign Up Now!

Related Questions

Girls, do you have sex drive?
I just want to get fucked! How to get a guy to approach you/notice you at a party?
Are you mentally ill or mentally healthy, and is it difficult or easy for you to orgasm during masturbation?
If a guy told you he could cum farther than he can pee, what would be your reaction?

What Girls & Guys Said

1 13

  • Well it's definitely not a deal breaker to me. It's really not that important.

    As for what you can do, I suppose you could take your time before giving head. More "outside work" so to speak. It slows the pace which can be a good thing instead of rushing straight into head, and you don't have to do it for as long. I also read that giving head while doing 69 is easier because of the way it curves. I honestly wouldn't know ANY of this from experience though.

    • Well the thing is that we wanted to do it fast, no time for outside work. We barely get any intimate time, and we haven't had sex in a long while because of some issues.. so he had to do it fast =/ anyway thanks!

  • I thought it will be deal breaker for me if a woman doesn't know how to kiss but that proved wrong too :D

    The woman I love and will always is BAD at giving head that she does once in a blue moon but that never stopped me being crazy about everything in her including her tempers, demands and mood swings - all of them make me fall in love with her all over again :D

  • ;) cheer up. Just keep practicing...I'm sure he won't mind when you'll have mastered the technique and can give him a Mind Blowing BJ.

  • I think you sound like a great gf.

    Having a girlfriend who wants to give head and wants to do it it well is wonderful.

  • Hey. DON'T worry.

    You sounds like an awesome girlfriend.

    We don't DATE a girl just because she gives blowjob what the f***. You need to relax it's really not a big deal.

    Some chicks who refuse to give blowjobs have boyfriends still, whereas you even tried to continue even though you felt like vomitting...

    Don't apologize. Everything is fine. You are more than a person here to suck his d*** to him.

    LoL how can you even think it would be a deal breaker.

  • As long as she is eager to learn, I can absolutely work with that.

  • I do not care.

    • I don't like BJ and don't care.

  • as long as you keep trying and let him come in your mouth, it should be fine

  • Dont worry if he comes your doing it right! :D

  • Nah she could learn, practice makes perfect ;)

  • kiss and lick the penis and suck only the head.don't force yourself to go deeper.if he loves you he will be happy this way.and if you don't like the semen(I know it smells gross),don't let him come in your mouth.i know I wouldn't leave you.

  • Not at all. I would be happy to help her. I asked my girl to show me where and how she likes to be touched, I learned, and she loves it. If I was ever not satisfied with her technique, I would've helped her. Communication and working together is a big key to great sex.

  • As long as she is willing to learn, it's not a deal breaker if she doesn't give good head.

    Oral sex, like any other skill, gets better with experience. :)

  • I don't think its a deal breaker, as long as you try.

Latest Questions

Blow job or Hand job?
Do you like eating pussy from the back or front and why?
Is my mom cheating Should I tell the guy?
Do girls with ugly bodies send nudes or hot bodies usually?
Home >  Sexual Health  > Is it a deal breaker if your girlfriend doesn't know how to give good head?