What should you do when another guy is trying to steal your girl?

[Anonymous]

Say you go out to a bar with a girl you really like and you know she likes you back and your almost practically boyfriend and girlfriend just not official yet trying not to move too fast. So these guys come up and start talking to her. So, we re hanging out and she mentions having a threesome with this guy and his friend. I'm pretty pissed at this point but not showing it. It ended up being really awkward and she acted like she didint want me there anymore. I hung around a little bit then left. After thus girl has told me she wants us to egentually be together blah blah. But this really pissed me off. And I don't know who I she be mad at...the guy who was trying to take away from me or her? And really I think its either A. She was trying to play some kind of game with me or B. She someone who opens her legs to anyone and if that's the case, I'm not dating someone like that. I'm not going to go and fight for someone who's gonna stab me in the back.

[madhatters4]

I don't think you can techinically be mad at anyone. she did something before you two were together. You don't like that she did it. So now you have to decide fi you can get over that and see her the same.

For many men the idea of a girl in a devil's threeway is a major turn off (me included). I just find it too be a bit gross. It may be a double standard or just the way guys feel.

Frankly the guys coming up and flirting with her don't know your situation so they aren't guilty of anything. She is only guilty of not telling you about the threeway so you can be mad that you didn't find out til now...but mostly I think your anger is at the fact this girl who you saw one way you suddenly see in a different light. You probabyl feel like you wasted your time, the girl isn't what you thought which is frustrating because it means you may not be able to continue to see her

what do you mean by this? did she stab you in the back? did she cheat on you?

"She someone who opens her legs to anyone and if that's the case, I'm not dating someone like that. I'm not going to go and fight for someone who's gonna stab me in the back."

[Asker]

I meant that people don't just change over night. If you go out to bar and parties and hook up with random people you met that night. Just because someone's in a relationship doesn't mean they're gonna change. Chances are they're gonna continue ...just hide it more. I went out that night to be with her, she begged me to come out. She had no reason to talk to anyone else. And I know damn right if I went talking to girls, she would get mad at me.

[madhatters4]

if a guy approaches her what is she supposed to do? Just because she talks to someone who cares? And if she would get mad if you talked to a girl why do you need to do the same? We're adults so we can behave in mature ways. I get not liking seeing her talk to them it brings up bad thoughts, but she did NOTHING wrong by talking to them...

[madhatters4]

as far as people changing. maybe she has maybe she hasn't but you're making assumptions. You don't want to date her fine. but to just assume x,y&z because she did something in her past isn't really logical. Perhaps she might but really the issue is you don't want a girl who had a threesome, and that's fine I wouldn't either. but she didn't particularly do anything wrong to you to deserve so much venom, she simply has a history you don't like (and again that is fair not to be cool with it).

[swiftsaver602]

best answer

[gonyr]

Be mad at her. But honestly, you aren't in a committed relationship yet. Of course, she may have been trying to get you jealous. Or maybe it was a joke. but if you aren't in a relationship she can do whatever she wants.

Doesn't mean you should date her though.

[jacquesvol]

A girl trying to get me jealous loses me.

[gonyr]

So lose her. Simple as that

[Asker]

And people do whatever they want in a relationship too. I don't feel comfortable with women who act like this when they're single. People don't change overnight relationship or not.

[Anonymous]

tell her how you feel then cut all ties. You don't want a woman who you can't trust. If you think she may want to be with other guys whether she hints at it or even says stuff like having sex with them then there is NO way you should put up with that! If a girl is committed then she souldnt need anyone else! same goes for guys!

[Asker]

We re not technically together. But I mean we re close. And I mean if I'm there and she likes me ...why go searching for other guys? Its also the fact she would have sex with someone she just met that night...it really bothers me. And if I did pusue a relationship then people don't just change their ways overnight which would lead to lies and secrets and affairs behind my back. Plus if you really like someone you don't go seeking out other people.

[Opinion Owner]

so why are you still trying to get with her? you said you basically have no trust in her anymore

[Asker]

Cause I'm trying to figure out if what happened is my fault or hers. My fault in being should I have stepped in and blocked the guys moves and fought for her since I'm the guy and since I didint she thought I was ignoring or rejecting her. OR her fault for how she acted. I kinda backed away because it pissed me off and kinda hurt my feelings. But she can argue she's techically single. And that I was ignoring her and not giving her attention because I didint step in. So, idk.

[Opinion Owner]

either way she wants a guys attention whether it be yours or another man's!

[Asker]

I think she's just been using me for attention.

[Opinion Owner]

sounds like it! or maybe she wants a relationship but doesn't want to be the one to ask!

[Asker]

True but if she wanted to be with me ...why go after other guys? This was a major turnoff for me .

[ImSoSozzled]

If it's a girl I'm with and I'm not worried about him stealing her, I'll pretend I'm gay and hit on the guy just for the lulz.

If it's a girl I just met and the dude's trying to cockblock, I tell him he has something white on the corner of his mouth. The girl will know he obviously doesn't but he'll try to wipe it off...oh no you've still got a little right there...he'll keep trying to get it off and the girl usually laughs and I turn her away from him and continue our conversation, and most of the time the guy will realize what happened, feel like an a**hole, and leave.

In your situation, I probably would have just rolled with her threesome comment and suggested an orgy. I don't really know her personality but it sounds like she was testing you. And that would also be a red flag to me that this girl isn't relationship material. If that happened again, I'd just forget about her and go talk to other girls.

[kheserthorpe]

She's not into you.

[Asker]

Then why would she say she is?

[kheserthorpe]

She jokes (?) about having casual sex but with you, she's sending 'don't move fast' signals and that she sees herself with you 'eventually'. She's willing to move fast, she's just in no hurry to be with you. Her head says you're the right guy, her p**** says no. That's unless you two are hooking up right now. In that case it's a different scenario entirely.

[TheGodEmperorLeto]

Talk to her about it. If she doesn't realize what's going on she's lying to herself or just you. If she doesn't stop talking with that guy, drop her ass and find a girl that treats you right. In your case, drop her ass.

[Asker]

Shes done this before. There is no talking about it. She ll either twist my words and accuse me of calling her a slut and make me feel like an a**hole. Or she ll try to say I'm controlling. And becomes really resistant to anything I say.

[TheGodEmperorLeto]

Drop her ass.

[cavmanier]

Hypothetically speaking, I would lose interest if she wants to be with other guys.

I'm curious why you think she would be willing to open her legs for anyone. You suspect she may do it for these two guys, but is that everyone?

[Asker]

Because she had just met them that night.

[strangerdanger]

lol if that was me right after she said that I'd go to the hottest chick in the bar and make out with her. Dump this bitch. Like you said either she's playing games or she's a sloot, neither which is good. If she's playing games she's retarded, like who does that? Tries to get their potential SO jealous b4 they go exclusive...

[Asker]

Good answer!

[front2back]

She's a sloot, better to just not converse with her at all. She can't make up her mind on whether she wants to take d*** or have a boyfriend.

[Asker]

Good answer.

[jacquesvol]

I'll first give her enough attention and try to make him look ridiculous or dumb or whatever negative.

Then It depends on how the girl reacts to him. If she wants him, and I'm not in for a threesome with him (which is probable), she has to chose. I'll move on eventually: I can't tie her up and beating him up or killing him gives only bigger problems.

[Asker]

I tried to give her attention and she brushed me off. Yet she was begging me to come out that night with her.

[jacquesvol]

"you know she likes you back and your almost practically boyfriend and girlfriend just not official" You might be hoping too much.

[Asker]

She seems to change be the day and might be the kind that has a new boyfriend every 2 weeks

[jacquesvol]

QA, Then it's up to you to see if you can change her or accept her the way she is. If not, the answer is obvious.

[dudeman]

f*** that why would you want a girl who did a mmf. sounds like a ho bag.

anyway if a guy is trying to take my girl at a bar or something, I do nothing. she is her own person and she can handle the situation. its up to her to tell the guy she has a man. now if he touches her then that's when I intervene. that's my women. you know I don't usually go to the bar alone, I have friends and stuff. so getting all upset because a dude is talking to her is a little strange to me. they could know each other from work or school or whatever else people do to fill their time. just like I hope she's not going to get possessive if a girl talks to me who I know and she doesn't.

[Asker]

I agree. That's what I was trying to figure out. Becaude there's this notion that women are easily persuaded or seduced and the guy needs to intervene. But, I say the woman is respinsible for her behavior.

[Anonymous]

she mentioned threesome with two guys? dirty durty, that's not the threesome/ girl that you want anyways. walk it off and be happy you didn't hit it

[Asker]

Yeah I agree

[Anonymous]

Have sex with him

[Asker]

With him?