Is it weird to be sexually open/perverted and a complete virgin? Have you met someone like this?

Or are you like this? I'm 24, a virgin, never been kissed or anything, and I'm probably more open about sex, sexuality, and my pervy thoughts than most of my girl friends who are not virgins. They think it's the funniest thing, that I'm such a prude in my behavior but I have the dirtiest mind and I'm so comfortable talking about sex. Are most virgins you know very shy about the subject? Have you met any pervy female virgins? I think it's almost natural to be more into thinking and talking about sex if you're not having any lol Well depending on sex drive and all that. If you're asexual or just don't care much, then obviously not. What do you think?
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Most Helpful Guys

  • In my experience, one has nothing to do with the other. That's especially true for girls.

    There are a lot of people who started their sexual lives with bad or boring experiences, they continue to have sex for a variety of reasons, but don't particularly enjoy it. There are girls who've been having sex for years who've never had an orgasm, never masturbate, and never think about sex unless their boyfriend wants it.

    There are also prudes who believe that sex is strictly for having children, married people who only do 2 minute missionary sex under the covers with the lights off for years and years. Nothing at all open or pervy about these people

    Sexual openness has a lot to do with how you're raised, whether you're taught that sex is dirty or shameful, etc. And of course your perv-o-meter level has a lot to do with your natural sex drive, which differs from person to person. These people will seek out information about sex on their own to satisfy their own curiosity and libido, even if they're not having sex.

    • agreed :) I always think its funny when I can make my sexually experienced friends blush or they can't believe what I've just said. Why do you say that's especially true for women?

    • It's especially true for women because they're more susceptible to bad first impressions of sex. Guys don't have to worry about pain or pregnancy, and male pleasure is physiologically a lot simpler. As a result, a lot of girls have sex to make their boyfriends happy without getting much fulfillment themselves. Sex is more complicated for girls, so the fact that they're having sex doesn't mean they're enjoying it or have a healthy outlook on it, relative to guys at least.

  • That's far more common than you'd think. And a lot of the most perverted, sexually adventurous girls I've known were shy and geeky in their normal lives, and probably the girls most people would assume would be clueless. Yet, they read a lot and thought a lot, but were just quiet about it.

    So, I'm not shocked. When you finally do start having sex, you'll probably be a lot better at it than your lack of experience would normally suggest.

    I will leave you with this quote from Revenge Of The Nerds (1984):

    Betty Childs, Pi-Delta-Pi: Are all nerds as good as you?

    Lewis: Yes.

    Betty Childs, Pi-Delta-Pi: How come?

    Lewis: 'Cause all Jocks ever think about is sports, all we ever think about is sex.

Most Helpful Girls

  • I'm exacly like you! Only that I'm 19, but still. I have the dirtiest mind and I love talking about sex. Nobody believes me when I tell them I'm a virgin! I'm a complete pervert and say whatever's on my mind, but when it comes to actual sex I just freeze, I do plenty of stuff but when a guys penis comes near my area I just freak out and have to stop. I don't have any virgin friends so I don't know if most of them are shy, but my non-virgin friends don't think about sex at all, They don't even enjoy it! And they hate talking about it so I just end jup joking around with the guys.

  • I'm exactly like this haha. Except I'm not exactly comfortable talking about it...prob because I feel like some people would be kind of judgey. But I have 2 friends who I let in sometimes on my frisky mind haha.

    • So true! I'm not comfortable talking about it at all because people will probably look at me funny.

    • frisky mind hehe

  • Wow, you ARE me! I am exactly like this. If my friends/family could read my mind they'll be shocked.

    I can't believe I have such a dirty mind, so many fantasies...

    • friends, don't mind. if my parents could read my mind, id be horrified

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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • It's not weird at all. After all, everyone has their sexual drives and fantasies and it doesn't change whether you're a virgin or not.

  • I tend to see that when people don't know the first hand experience their minds tend to be more creative and slightly over exaggerate sex. Their info comes from movies,books, other people etc. Basically external sources which glamorize sex. I know many virgins who talk the biggest game about sex and I'm there like my profile pic

    I think it is great though.Being open about sex (even though you've never had) is a good thing. ask the questions that need asking and find your sexual boundaries and ideas you would like to try. Just be careful not to raise expectations too high. An open minded virgin is always better than a closed minded one in my book

  • I'm kind of the same way and I'm 21. A lot of my views on sex, sexuality and sex work especially are more liberal than my non-virgin friends lol.

  • na that's normal lol

    thats all I'm gonna say:P

  • Yeah, I'm a virgin too, and although I've been wishing/dreaming of having a OnS/friends with benefits with someone, I've also figured that... well, in a What-IF scenario, where I actually do get that lucky, it's likely that I would hesitate at the last second as well.

  • I went to university with a girl like that. She believed in waiting until marriage, but certainly had a dirty mind.

  • haha, I think you're heading down a dangerous path. The longer you hold out, once it happens you'll be obsessed with sex.

    • probably lol

  • im a 19 year old virgin & I have a dirty mind. I love sexting (not with just anybody) I also have fantasies & love lingerie lol

    • lingerie is fun! :)

    • & sexy!

  • Well, I'm pretty much the male version of you, except more in the closet about talking about sex openly. I tend to keep my thoughts to myself.

    I think there's a big difference between being horny and being slutty though.

    I actually want to remain a virgin until marriage, because I think having one sexual partner in your lifetime should be enough for anyone. I think that makes sex more special. I want to one day find a female virgin who thinks the same way.

    It feels a bit like being a vegan who craves steak, and I guess that's something not many people would understand. People only understand instant gratification, and so they assume you must either be frigid or promiscuous. But instant gratification isn't sexy. Self restraint is sexy.

    • Oh I don't want to wait for marriage. I don't have conservative morals, just other things going on. And I wasn't ready when I was younger, not even interested in high school for the most part, so it never happened. I'm vegan and I never crave steak, but sometimes seafood does call to me :D I'm sure you can find someone like this though. Especially in the religious circles. Or if you just happen to hit it off with a non religious virgin and get married - voila!

    • So maybe you're a late bloomer, since you weren't interested in high school. Either way, I think being a virgin is hot, and I assure you many guys will secretly agree whether they're conservative or not.

  • i'm almost 26 and I've only had sex once

  • haha it seems like a lot of virgin girls on here are like that or mostly are like that, I thought I was the only one lol jk ;D

  • Yes, its no big deal.

  • I'm a virgin with a very dirty mind but I'm so shy talking bout anything sex related.