Sexual Health
+1 y

Is it even worth waiting for that special someone to have sex?

im 19 a virgin & I was wondering if its even worth waiting for the "special someone".im single & never really been in a serious relationship (im not really allowed to date) I can wait to have sex I just don't know if I should since sex lost its meaning long ago from being something special to becomming something random & common. how many of you can say you waited & it was worth it & how many can say you waited, but got disappointed by that person?
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Most Helpful Girls

  • I waited until I was AT LEAST 18, so that I wouldn't feel like a slut of an easy chick, and I made sure I did it with the person that I love (and still love). I didn't just make the decision on a random guy or do one of those 'let's just get it over with' one night stands.

    I knew from the get go that the guy I am with now will be with me for a long time, at least a year, which in my mind justifies my decision to lose my virginity.

    I don't think it's worth waiting for, because if you wait till marriage or whatever, you just lost a whole lot of good times and learning stuff and memories that you could have had years ago.

    I say live out life, and satisfy any curiosity you have, while you're still young and have much to learn. It's better than sitting there wondering and worrying over what to do next.

    It's also not as special as everyone makes it seem, it's not the holy grail if you are still a virgin, and its not like finding Atlantis when you lose it, although once you experience it, it can get better, and you will want to keep doing it sometimes.

    It all depends on who you are with, and the memories and feelings you had/have for the person that helped you lose it.

  • Well... I did it at 18 yo, with a really special guy, and it was wonderful and worth it (for his care and patience), but its not like I kept myself from sex before him. I had sex when I was ready, and if I was ready before we met, id probably still have sex.

    Doing it with someone special is nice cause this is the very first time you'll be that vulnerable next to someone, and you need patience and comprehension from him. Plus it will be much more comfy if you love and trust him. You'll be less shy, less afraid, less self conscious...

    But if you're already ready for too long and "Mr Special" doesn't appear, its okay to do it with a random hookup, just so you can start your sexual life already. Be aware, though, that he probably won't care much about your insecurity or fear, he won't spend 30 minutes just kissing you so you can get more comfy (like my boyfriend did).

    Wheight the pros and cons, the choice is only yours and depends on how you feel about your virginity.

  • I believe it is SO worth it. For me I lost my virginity to rape, and you have no idea how hard that was. I wished for so long that I could have that real "first" time, then I realized your virginity isn't something someone can take. It's more than physical it, emotional and mental. People treat virginity like it's nothing, but in reality its the only thing that you can call yours! No one can just take it (yes they can take your innocence and purity) but never your virginity! It's the only thing you have to call your own, so keep it until someone deserving of it comes around! it's like this:

    you wouldn't give someone a gift that you've let a bunch of people open, and peek into, so why do that with your body? do you really want your body and virginity to be for show and tell? I know MANY people will disagree with me, but this is what I believe!

    • Thanks for the BA! I hope all goes well for you! Just think before you act! :)

    • thanx you deserve it & I hope your rapist got the fucking death penalty bloody ass

    • Never took any of them to court! honestly, I wish I'd never told anyone, it turned into a HUGE mess :/

Most Helpful Guys

  • Sex is basically a natural design to keep life ever lasting on earth. As man and woman attain some level of maturity - physical - able to produce babies - it trigger desire for sex. In our society and most religious beliefs - responsibility of taking care of new born is on girl, in addition to carrying it in her womb till birth. That is why it is not desired to have sex before marriage. As now there are many ways of protections available, most girls and guy enjoy it before marriage - and with anybody they like to try. Sex is ultimate expression of love and feelings and it should not be done with anybody, it is for some one special. Please try to observe your family traditions and religious beliefs. Do not jump in it just for curiosity or pleasure. Do it with some one special - with whom you would start family.

  • If you have to ask "is it worth it" then for you it probably won't be.

    It's always mixed whether people say it was worth it or not.

    If you want to wait, then wait. but If you're in the moment with somoene, and feel like you want to do it, then do it.

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What Girls & Guys Said

6 5

  • who says it lost it's meaning? that may be what a lot of people write these days but I honestly doubt that.

    there are still plenty of people who value it for what it is and are rather more picky who they will share sexual encounters with.

    I had fooled around with boyfriends but didn't lose my virginity till I was 20 and in a relationship with a nice boyfriend. I am forever grateful that I stuck to my principles as it was a lovely experience.

    I have had plenty of sex but only very few partners and I am happy this way.

    that might not be something that suits other people

    so listen to yourself. your heart.. not to what other people say

    it has to be right for you not anyone else.

    there is no guarantee that you won't be disappointed by someone else, that just not how life works, you can only control if you disappoint yourself.

  • I depends on your choices. My first time was at 19, I didn't wait for that special someone but it was a great experience. A great way way to begin my sexual life. I don't regret it because I have my special someone now :)

  • Hey you wait. Yes it is worth waiting for someone special. Everyone is different with different backgrounds. Take your time.

  • Nope! :)

  • No. The "special someone" is a fairy tale, but that doesn't mean you should give it to just anyone either. Find someone who likes you and respects you and who you trust, but don't expect Prince Charming because people just aren't like that.

    • Which is to say, there's a big difference between having realistic expectations and having no expectations at all.

  • Let just say that in my experience, those women who have "waited for that special someone" tend to be more likely to have a repressed sexuality, insufficient technique and experience and get less pleasure out of sex than those who didn't make a big fuss out of it.

  • Not really as long as you still love that person and believe that you will still be with them for a long time. If it is just like a quick hook up then that is different then in that situation it would be better to wait.

  • Honestly it's not because its hard finding "the one".

  • Not really marriage is just about reproduction not about love . Have all the sex you want

  • While I agree with you to a degree, it's wholly inaccurate to say that sex has lost it's meaning. It hasn't lost any of it's meaning for those in loving, committed relationships.

  • Yah, I hear you I wish it was way more special. :(

    • yeah me too

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