My Experiences Since I've "Come Out"

ladsin
My Experiences Since I've "Come Out"

I will skip the story of how I realized I was attracted to the same sex as well as the opposite, but if you would like that background just look at my other myTakes, particularly- "My trip from a "homophobic" pastor trainee to a bi man in a relationship with another man."

So, a brief overview for those of you who do not know my story: I came out to my father around a year and a half to two years ago now, and I came out to my mom around Christmas.

So to try and explain my experiences I will split this myTake up into how different people have reacted. Particularly, family, friends, and people in public.

Family: As I said, I told my dad first and he responded really positively saying that he loved me no matter what and that as long as I was happy he was happy. He has met my boyfriend now around four times and really likes him. After I had been with my boyfriend for 6 months I decided to tell my mom, and she was NOT happy. We went to counseling together once a week for several months and it certainly strained our relationship. Now however, she has largely come to terms with it even though she does not agree with it. She finally met him a month ago and was very amicable.

My Experiences Since I've "Come Out"

We are still struggling to work out how to integrate this, because I have a 7 year old sister and my mother does not want her to know about me, but I of course do not agree and think her decision is not fair to me or my partner. One of the funnier aspects about me coming out as "bi" is that both of my parents refuse to accept that I am accepted to both. My father thinks that I am only gay and am lying when I say that I am attracted to women as well; whereas, my mother says that I am really straight and this whole boyfriend thing is just a phase.

Friends: Telling my friends was really awkward. I am a really manly man and no one had ever even considered the possibility of me being attracted to men as well so coming out to them was difficult, because I could not think of a "chill" way to bring it up. So, me being as smart as I am decided to get really drunk with my best friends and tell them while we were drunk. My best friend since 4th grade (we'll call J) responded really well when I told him. I basically said, "yeah, you know how I said I have a GF? It's really a boyfriend." He looked shocked for a moment but then kept going on about how much he loved me and that it's all good etc. Then he did not talk to me for a week (which I thought nothing of because we were not normally talking everyday).

Later he told me that he was really weirded out by it and did not know how to react so he told his mom after a week and she said he was stupid, because I was no different. Since then we have become far closer and he (sometimes annoyingly) always goes out of his way to tell everyone at parties and stuff. This has surprisingly always gone over really well. I remember the first party I was really worried that it would make things weird, but to the contrary all the guys acted pretty normal (asked a few questions but nothing offensive), and the girls interestingly all wanted to be my best friend (which was kind of weird because as a pretty masculine guy girls tend to be a little "intimidated" by me (I think) and don't talk to me, but they all of a sudden wanted to hangout all night.)

My Experiences Since I've "Come Out"

The next friend (we'll call Q) was one of my best friends in high school and we would hang out everyday at school, and I'd spend the night at his house once or twice a week. As before I waited to tell him until we were both drunk (he was also high) and his first question was "Are you a top or bottom?" Which was interesting in and of itself, but after he acted relatively normal until we got back to his house at which time he tried to come onto me. I found this hilarious and laughed and told him no. I regret how I handled the situation because since then we have not talked or hung out, and I can only assume that if I had been kinder in the rejection we would still be friends (to clarify I didn't say anything mean, I was just taken so aback that I couldn't help laughing.)

The last will be rather short because she is a relatively new friend (maybe a month before I entered my relationship), and she just finds me to be her greatest gay friend basically. She especially loves talking to me because many of her other girlfriends would judge her for the things she tells me, but I don't. We just recently went to NY together and had a great time!

General Public: So my story isn't nearly as bad as many other's I've heard, but it certainly hasn't been all that positive. As I've stated before, unless I tell someone they would never know so I haven't had problems walking around by myself, but my boyfriend has because he's pretty obviously gay. It hurts me to hear his problems because these people are just dicks. I will give three examples in particular. Two are from his jobs.

My Experiences Since I've "Come Out"

At the time he was working at a restaurant and the hospital as a nurse. Not just once, but multiple times that he was working at the restaurant people would refuse to be served by him and complain to the manager. Secondly, a bunch of the female nurses at his hospital were talking about boys and joking around, at which time one girl asked him a question and he joined in with the joking. As it turns out though one of the girls reported him for sexual harassment for doing the same thing that they were doing for no conceivable reason other than that he was gay.

The third was when the both of us were walking downtown and holding hands and a street preacher came up and started shouting about abominations and how we were the cause of much of the evil in society etc. At this point I got really mad and wanted to argue with him (and honestly kind of wanted to punch him in the face for being a dick to my partner), but my partner has gotten so used to that sort of thing that he just dragged me off with his head down. Normally though when I'm with him we just receive a lot of negative looks and whispers which is annoying but I don't really care what people say.

The end! XP

My Experiences Since I've "Come Out"
My Experiences Since I've "Come Out"
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