The Truth About Safe Spaces

[Anastasiya00]

Well, I have had a very different views about the concept of a safe space for the past... year? Well, by the time I was transitioning from liberal to conservative. Yes, I had my feminist, special snowflake phase. I didn't fell that deep into it though.

Anyway.

The first time I heard about it I thought ''Oh well that sounds nice!'' but when I started listening to different views it changed. I totally thought they were for cry babies and people who can't handle reality.

But are they?

You know, the very very fist time I hear the word ''safe space'' was when I was 8. I remember I was with a psychologist I was sent to (nothing serious, just ADHD symptoms and I used to worry sooo much about things kids shouldn't). Well I was having a tough time and she told me to feel free that this was a safe space and I would not be judged, whatever I said won't get me in trouble. (F.E, I thought if I said something bad about my mom she would tell her)

I completely forgot about this until two months ago when I was at school I was having a LOT of problems at home, academically, socially, personally, etc. So a tutor who is a psychologist noticed my change in behavior and took me to her office and told me the same thing, that I can say anything about what was bothering me, with no worries. That this was a SAFE SPACE. Then I got the flashback

This made me think about all the insults and mockery safe spaces get and the people who want them. I mean, I have mocked it myself. HERE. But if you think about it we all have a safe space. Weather its your room, your home, your friends, your significant other, or a psychologist. We all sometimes need a break from reality. And that doesn't make us weak.

I think the concept is frowned upon by a lot of people now because it is flawed and has gone out of control. The internet is not a safe space, no website is, and well, life out there is not a safe space. So we can't silence opinions of others for the sake of a safe space, but still, let's not think of it as bad. You just gotta find one that doesn't affect others. Like, you being alone in your room its fine, going with a counselor doesn't silence anyone else.. Am I explaining myself? Let's just not abuse from it. Learn to not go there anytime you feel sightly uncomfortable, or even offended. As everyone has heard, too much of anything is bad.

[Dred1614returns]

A safe space in an AA meeting, a therapist's office, or a mental health facility is fine.
The safe spaces that get ripped on (rightfully) are the ones that feature leftist snowflake brats that can't understand that not everybody thinks the way they do.

[Anastasiya00]

Exactly! It is fine when you really need professional help for things you can't control by yourself. And as I said, it is fine to have your own occasional ''safe space'' like your room or something when you are really breaking down lol we all have those. But yes, as you said, those safe spaces they ''need'' to be away from opposite views is ridiculous, we all have to learn to deal with it.

[FýrdracaDócincel]

I like the way you think.

[worldscolide]

Goddamn right. Couldnt have said it better my self.

[somewheresomeway]

https://youtu.be/sXQkXXBqj_U

[RolandCuthbert]

Haha! I don't see how this concept of "safe space" is an invention of "liberals". It seems to be an invention of narrow-minded people.

It is funny to hear people who think they are "Conservative" comment on this. In the classical "liberal" world, you have to be around many different people who have different views. That is supposed to be a founding principle of liberalism.

What you are noting is the "opposition" to the notion that we should live amongst those with different viewpoints. It is a hilariously hypocritical position held by many people who think they are "Conservatives", but of course are not by any stretch of the imagination.

Again, it is hilarious to listen to, "I want people to be "tolerant" of my view that I can be intolerant of everyone else".

[jpmoore89]

I think our whole generation has lost it to be honest. Many generations before us had backbone and went on to build and do monumental accomplishments. Now don't get me wrong, they had their problems too but they worked the problems and they tried for the most to right their wrongs. Our generation on the other hand seems to be very disconnected from reality. We want to get paid lots of money but are unwilling to gain experience or work hard. Many just play video games, eat fast food, watch reality TV, follow the Kardashians, or believe as unflawed truth what is taught in college. Many in our gereration don't even know what manual labor is and yet so many moan and complain because they have to do a "hard" job. They have never experienced hard work in their life! Our colleges are just making it worse. They are a cesspool of intolerant ideas and brainwashing. This whole "safe space" idea is just another in a long line of insane ideas to make it so no other point of view other than the idea of global socialism and progressivism is pushed. Our gereration is in for a rude awakening some day soon. There are no safe spaces from ideas of thought in the real world. There is disappointment and despair which in reality is just called life. Our generation needs to go back to our ancestors and relearn the meaning or respect, hard work, liberty, and all the other good attributes once practiced.

[Nyx_85]

Yes a lot of millennials don't have a clue about hard work or respect and liberty. But there are also things older generations aren't quite aware of. Years ago you would never see a mentally handicap person out in public because they were locked away and treated like they didn't exist. People with any sort of differences were shut away. My mother never got help for her dyslexia as a child. Instead she was put in the back of the classroom and ignored. I work in a retirement home and much of the language they use would be considered offensive today, yet is perfectly fine and normal to them. For instance one time I heard one of them say "Yeah his wife was a native lady. She was a school teacher. She was smart for a native". He meant it as a compliment. Another time one of the ladies was talking about surprised she was that her male 'negro' nurse at the hospital did such a good job. Again it was meant as a compliment. But say those things in any regular setting and it would be different.

[Nyx_85]

My 79 year old coworker constantly makes comments that are extremely ignorant and intolerant against anyone who is even remotely different than herself. I was talking to my boss about my friend's kid with autism. How hard it is to get him to eat. My coworker goes off about how 'in her day' she ate whatever was put in front of her or else she went to bed hungry and kids are too spoiled and entitled today. Yeah maybe lots of kids ARE spoiled and entitled today but this kid has a disorder which affects the way in which is brain works. Making him eat certain foods would be the equivalent to someone making you eat sandpaper or dog poop. I've found a lot of people in older generations just don't understand stuff like this.

[fabulouspancakes]

I think it's a well-intended idea that went too far, as tends to happen. Safe spaces were supposed to be for people dealing with trauma to avoid being triggered (another word that's been hijacked by anti-SJWs). Unfortunately they evolved into echo chambers where people of certain ideology are "safe" from opposing opinions. So yeah, I think safe spaces and trigger warnings as they were originally intended, are a great thing. But not when they extend to the point of silencing all opposing viewpoints in spaces that were intended for open discussion (like college campuses).

[Anastasiya00]

exactly, the issue is how it got out of hand

[Anonymous]

Let's say you have a group of students who are constantly threatened and beat up at school. They come to the school and ask for a safe space, and are given a room where they can at least eat lunch without anyone else being allowed in. We've solved nothing. The threats still exist unchecked. When they leave those doors, their bullies are still there waiting for them for the rest of the day.

How does a school control that? They can't be everywhere all the time, nor can they go cracking down on every single person who ever utters a mean word to anyone, or threatens violence because they must have proof. And then if those kids get a safe space, what about other kids who also feel they need one for their issues, but don't feel safe hanging with the other kids who have other issues. There are no winners. No one has done anything about anything other then create more temporary walls and more doors between them.

At the heart of the matter are the real issues in the bullies vs. the bullied, but if we don't want to spend any time as a school dealing with that or them because you know it's school, not a babysitting service, then what of it. We become a society or a school that neither cares that people are allowed to bully or that some students suffer the consequences.. some of which, we've learned, can have serious consequences for everyone else if left unchecked. We say both sides of that coin are wrong, but do nothing... so, kids will still ask for a safe space because no one wants to do much... and on and on we will go with this, so a school may concede that it's just easier legally, morally, path of least resistance, to just give whomever that token that says, don't sue us, we gave you a safe space.

[AleDeEurope]

I don't think anyone is for the idea of absolutely no safe space anywhere. There's certain places where safe spaces are necessary, like talking to your therapist, or a veterans meeting, hospital or whatever, you're not gonna go there and start making gun and explosion sounds cause you can trigger people with PTSD.
Safe spaces should be allowed when there's people that suffer from disorders like PTSD, but not for liberals who can't handle a different opinion, or my skin color. The only "disorders" those people have is being idiots and racists.
Making a whole college a safe place, is basically putting rules on what people can and can't say, it's not about listening to others like a therapist, or avoiding a PTSD situation like it would be at a veterans hospital. That's the type of safe spaces people are against, the ones that tell you how to think, what to say, and how to act. That's fascism masked as progressiveness.

[Anastasiya00]

well said!

[Anonymous]

I think they've been abused by people trying to push their agenda's and bullying anyone else into silence.

I just don't think "Safe spaces" can operate in large groups. It's more of like a small group. As in like 5 or 6. Because beyond that you cannot open your mouth or changes or anything you say will offend at least someone in some capacity.

It worked with your psychologist just because it was only you and them. They are trained to be open-minded and focus primarily on your specific mental well being.

[Anastasiya00]

Agree

[10dsw]

I support safe spaces for people with legitimate psychological or medical problems: i. e. autism, mobility disorders, etc.

But I want to gag when I hear things like safe spaces for women, safe spaces for gays, safe spaces for lesbians, ugh. You're perfectly accepted in society, you don't need a safe space.

[Anastasiya00]

exactly, some might do need one for medical reasons, but you know, even those who actually need them need to work with a professional on their issues rather than keep hiding from them.

[lovelyhoneybones]

There is no such thing as a "safe" place in this world outside of your parents house. Even if colleges and other places were to provide people with medical and psychological problems with safe places, what happens when they're else where. Ass holes are a big part of life, you learn to deal with it.

Not to mention that the main people who need safe places are feminists, SJW and anti Trump supporters.

[Anastasiya00]

@lovelyhoneybones When I talk about people who actually need safe spaces I mean people who went to war and had pstd, or any other person with a diagnosed mental illness. As I mentioned, even this people will have to work out their traumas with a professional

[lovelyhoneybones]

I get what you're saying, but safe spaces can only be provided in certain areas. Life isn't a safe space. Eventually they'll be places where there aren't any. I agree with conseling though. It's something that should be set up for soldiers when they get back from war.

[Anastasiya00]

@lovelyhoneybones Yes, that is what I was trying to say

[0112358]

I think there should be safe spaces for those who need them.

The issue is, what should be a safe space? And 'how safe'? A therapists office should absolutely be a safe space.

The question is, should a university lecture be a 'safe space' with regards to challenging to triggering ideas? Should an entire university campus be a safe space? That's where we get controversial.

[goaded]

How about a lecture being safe from unannounced triggers?

"Today we will be talking about..., there will be pictures/sounds/video/whatever". When you walk into the lecture hall, you should know that you will be warned about controversial topics and can remove yourself if you don't think you can cope; it shouldn't come as a shock.

[0112358]

@goaded For images/video depicting violence or for detailed descriptions of violence, sure. But that's about it.

[Anastasiya00]

agree 100%

[goaded]

How about with claustrophobics and videos of caving, or arachnophobics and videos of spiders? It costs almost nothing (a couple of seconds and a bit of thought) to give warnings, but can save people significant distress.

[0112358]

@goaded I'm not all that supportive. Like if your arachnophobia is so bad that seeing a picture of a spider causes you severe distress you should get help - which incidentally will involve looking at pictures of spiders, really really soon into the treatment, like often within -hours-. Avoidance is the worst possible course. While i'm not saying 'lets revel in giving people shock therapy', I mean sure, you are naming phobias, but people could have phobias of anything.

Put another way, a children's movie wouldn't have a warning it shows caving. it would seem odd to me that a university lecture would require one.

[goaded]

I don't know; I don't think I have any phobias, so I can't really relate.

Have you ever seen The Descent? :)

[0112358]

@goaded I have! lol

I'd also say by the way with regards to the above that if someone has a genuine phobia, there's no reason they can't approach the professor at the start of the course and say 'i'm dealing with this, treating it now, is there anything I should be aware of'? ANd the professor should try, but especially when it comes to in class -discussion- who knows what will come up.

[Marinite]

A safe space is a note on a classroom door telling students that it's okay to come to the teacher inside and tell them about their problems, such as coming out as gay or talking about bullies.

That is how safe spaces began. The fact that they've evolved into this huge neurotic debate where the very bullies they're intended to exclude rally to mock the idea itself is a little gross to be honest. I don't know that every single space claimed to be safe has in fact been a good thing, but this neurotic narrative going on is toxic.

[ak666]

I don't think it's worth sympathizing with those types, since sympathy is exactly what lead to all these safe spaces in the first place.

They need tough love of a kind they didn't receive from their parenting and previous schooling.

And that leaves me with the ultimate problem. I think most of these SJW types must have come from public schools and poor parents with a highly sympathetic attitude, making them feel like everyone is a winner and that everyone is so special.

We can't keep on doing that and overprotect these types. When they get out of university, they're not going to find safe spaces everywhere they go.

[ak666]

"Poor parents" as in bad, overprotective sheltering types who pampered their children too much.

[BaileyisDarcy]

If someone is using and abusing their safe place then i agree with you. They just need some tough love and to learn how to deal with things.

For example my younger sister will start balling her eyes out just because its not her turn to pick a movie. I get that she's only six but come on.
She needs to suck it up.

But then you have someone who is working through some actual problems, its fair enough if they need a place where they can feel safe and unjudged.

This isn't a black and white thing.

[ak666]

@BaileyisDarcy For me it has to be a little bit less grey in a university setting for the simple reason that there's not necessarily going to be a safe place at work, e. g. If our goal is to prepare young adults to be ready for the harsh world out there, I think it's just as essential to ween them off of campus safe spaces as it is to teach them any academic subject.

[ak666]

@BaileyisDarcy It's like if universities are too stressful and scary for some people, imagine the work environment where your boss cares little about your feelings except whether or not you're profitable for the company. We can't prepare people effectively for this type of world if people are clinging onto safe spaces all the way through their higher education.

[BaileyisDarcy]

Actually if you're ingenious enough you can find a safe space anywhere.

For example.
A single stall toilet with a working lock.
Working that shift where more often than not you're completely alone.
Spending some time with a trusted friend.
Keeping some spare time to yourself and not fretting about the chores you werent going to do anyway.
One of those quiet moments where nothing urgent is waiting and you can simply breathe.
During your work break.
Attending to a relaxing hobby. Say knitting, or drawing or writing or even just puzzles.

A safe space doesn't have to be a place. It can just be a moment where you take the time to breathe.

[ak666]

@BaileyisDarcy That's fine and I agree with the usefulness and necessity of those. When people go out on their own, for many young adults solitude in their apartment will be their ultimate safe space. I'm only talking about the designated safe spaces on campus. I don't think they are healthy, or if students feel a strong need for them, I don't think they're really ready to be released into the jungle, so to speak, until they no longer feel that need.

[ak666]

@BaileyisDarcy My main gripe with designated safe spaces is not specifically with them. I think they're a symptom of a root problem which begins much earlier in their upbringing. I don't really feel like schools these days are preparing children at a young age to compete and fail without breaking their spirit, to be teased without becoming so upset or angry, and to experience ideas that conflict with their own without feeling threatened by them. The desire for designated safe spaces is, as I see it, a symptom of a failure that begins much earlier in the development of a young person.

[lovelyhoneybones]

Safe spaces are for butt hurt adult babies. If you don't like what somebody has to say or you can't deal with someone's opinion, reason or LOGIC, you need to grow the f*ck up. These people are not cut out for the world. You can't have people dancing around your feelings.

Safe spaces are for kindergarten class rooms. Even then I'm sure those kids would handle words better than this air heads.

[Anastasiya00]

Agree I used to think exactly like you, but as I said everyone has their own type of ''safe space'' even if its your room, admit t hat you go there and have your breakdown there, maybe talk to someone you trust and then go back to real life.

[lovelyhoneybones]

I feel those are two different safe places. Your room is in the privacy of your home, these people want safe places in public where people can't use any words that are offensive towards them. That isn't life. If they need a moment, of course, go somewhere you can be alone but don't expect PUBLIC places to accommodate your lack of a back bone.

[Anastasiya00]

I know. That was my point. That we all have a type of our own ''safe space'' even if you are not aware of it, but the SJWs are the ones who are taking the mile. I am not defending the idea of always hiding from reality.

[JDavid25]

Nicely written Mytakes.. I guess I had a few subconscious safe spaces.. But even those weren't safe spaces sometimes.. LOL..

[JDavid25]

mytake**..

[Anastasiya00]

Thank you!

[JDavid25]

No problem! :)

[DanoMR98]

You're personalising the issue too much. Most anti-SJW's aren't talking about the safe spaces that actual sick people need. They're talking about a place where college students go to feel safe from politics they find disagreeable. Of course we all have places that are safe, but saying "safe space" in the context of today means something different.

[Anastasiya00]

Yes, That is why I say we shouldn't abuse from it

[Lumberman53]

The idea isn't so much safe spaces are bad it's that people want them because of petty reasons or they seem to expect them in the real world which is misguided to say the least

[Anastasiya00]

That is what I was talking about but in other words duh

[Lumberman53]

fair enough

[sometimesilikecheese]

everywhere is a safe space if you yell loud enough.

[John_Doesnt]

So you hate safe spaces because you and some friends intentionally made them awful? Don't you think the problem is you and not the safe space?
The last thing we need is another legal age voter who doesn't know what the hell they're talking about.

[Anastasiya00]

UUUUUMMMMM Did you even read my mytake? I NEVER made it ''awful''. I never ever had a safe space other than my psychologist. Why would I be the problem? I haven't done anything! Did I ever mention that I did some movement so college campuses could have multiple rooms for safe space? No, cause I did not do such thing. Oh and by the way, I can't legally vote. I am NOT EVEN FROM THE USA.

[John_Doesnt]

You said you and your friends were making fun of people in your stupid safe spaces. It was you making the safe space suck not the safe space itself.

[Anastasiya00]

Um no I didn't do that and I didn't say that. Show me were exactly I supposedly mention I did that? seriously, quote that line.

[John_Doesnt]

Go ahead with your fruity rant about safe spaces, but like every "conservative" you're blowing things out of proportion for what really goes on.

[Anastasiya00]

Well, there it is. You can't show me where I said such thing. Cause I didn't. You didn't read my mytake properly and now you are afraid to admit it, so you don't show your evidence cause its inexistent. You don't have to read my mytake, but just don't put words in my mouth and accuse me of doing things I don't.

[EmperorOfGAG]

He's an idiot.

[Anastasiya00]

@EmperorOfGAG yes!

[John_Doesnt]

@EmperorOfGAG I understand you're both homophobes, but that doesn't mean you can take it out on the rest of society.

[zagor]

Where did they say anything about homosexuality?

[Anastasiya00]

@zagor at this point I don't know and idc either this dude is a total moron or is trolling. either way I'll just ignore hahahah

[EmperorOfGAG]

You're pissing me off, where did we ever say anything about sexuality?

[Anastasiya00]

@EmperorOfGAG he makes up things lol he put words in my mouth then used against me. that how all this drama started lol

[EmperorOfGAG]

Just block him he's a troll.

[John_Doesnt]

@EmperorOfGAG is it my fault that you 2 are homos?

[EmperorOfGAG]

Why do you think we're homos? We never talked about it.

[John_Doesnt]

@EmperorOfGAG you specifically said "I'm a homosexual so I hate safe spaces".

[EmperorOfGAG]

You're on drugs.

[GirlThatDraws]

No one is safe anymore

[Anonymous]

I agree some people are just not fit for college.