Ten things not to say to someone with aspergers

[stevephillips706]

I have heard a lot of talk about people with Aspergers on this website and i would like to adress the following things you should never say to someone with Aspergers.

1. Never ever talk in a low tone voice like you would talk to a dog. Its demeaning on so many different levels.

2. Whats it like to have Aspergers. That's like me asking a black person what it like to be black there is no one answer since everyone experience is different.

3. I could never imagine what its like to have Aspergers or Aspergers must suck. It doesn't suck yes at times its difficult but it doesn't suck.

4. You don't act like my cousin or friend with Aspergers. that is because everyone with Aspergers is different and no two people with Aspergers are alike.

5. Have you ever had a relationship or sex before. Yes I have had a girlfriend and sex before just because i have Aspergers doesn't make me immune to having sex or having relationships.

6. Why don't you just try and act normal. by normal you mean neurotpical i can't do that because i am not neurotypical never have been and never will be.

7.Do you like to be touched. Yes I have no problem being touched and most people with Aspergers don't mind being touched.

8. I would never want my kid to have Aspergers. Yes saying that is offensive no matter how you word it its like saying to a gay person i would never want my kid to be gay.

9.You seem so normal. How can you have Aspergers. That's like me saying you seem so straight how can you be gay.

10. Wow, you must be really good with numbers/smart/talented/etc. No not all people with Aspergers are good with math or have weird obsessions like trains so please don't generalize all of us.

Well that's it just remember people with Aspergers can and do everything neurotypical can do its not a death sentence its just a different way of living.

[molan]

Well Aspergers are not neurologically typical, however it's not autistic either.
Sure it's is the autism spectrum but it's more characterised by difficulties in social interaction and communication.

Aspergers is somewhere in between normal and autistic, ranging from almost completely normal to almost completely autistic.

[RationalLioness]

I suppose I could see why someone would be offended by "I don't ever want my kid to have Aspergers" if it's said aloud.

But I would think most people would want their children to not have any type of mental/physical hindrance through life that will only make it harder for them in some ways.

[been_waiting]

He didn't say it was wrong to hope your child doesn't have aspergers, he's saying that that comment is rude.

[RationalLioness]

I kind of assumed that, but I wanted to clarify if that wasn't what he honest meant.

[bubble_tea]

I don't think I've ever met anyone with Aspergers, so I don't even really know what makes them 'special'. But this was an interesting take and useful in case someone admits it in the future :)

[Hannah591]

I've met a couple of people with autism and aspergers - they always are very intelligent or very ambitious people.

[Anonymous]

I one knew someone for years, maybe 5 years. I never knew they had aspergers. I just thought they were a bit socially awkward, which I could relate to.

[diegoD]

how so? I am trying to figure out if I have that myself

[Opinion Owner]

@diegoD how were they socially awkward? He just never started conversation, didn't initiate socialization, although I could tell that sometimes he wanted to

[Anonymous]

It bugs me more when people put on what I call "The Poor Dear" voice. Where they talk to you like a child, when they change their tone of voice when speaking to you. "Oh the poor dear, I heard he's autistic, are you feeling okay today, oh poor dear".

[Nick7]

I dated a girl who has Aspergers. She was awesome. Wicked funny and smart.

[MelioraValidus]

Good post. I am a fellow "aspie" by the way.

[been_waiting]

Thanks for sharing