Why are men so obsessed with Asian women and why do they seem so scared of black women?

[fivecaratfake]

It seems like a lot of guys, if given the choice, always lust over Asian and middle eastern women. I saw a study done about online dating that said Asian women are the most replied to and black women are the least replied to. As a black woman that was kinda depressing, but it seems true for my experiences. I've heard that it's the stereotype of Asian women being submissive and also being a sort of mystery to American men, and that black women are less appealing because everyone seems to think they all have an attitude are too independent or outspoken. So, really I just wondered what your take on it is, and what makes men like or dislike one over the other? Is it based on stereotypes? Are there men out there that actually like outspoken and confident women, of any race?

[Gojira]

I grew up with Asian girls sorta. From around age 5 to 16 I lived in Japan and the Philippines. I'm sorry but I have to laugh at the notion that Asian women are submissive. Nothing personal. I always laugh, even out loud sometimes when I read or hear that. People watch too many old American made movies.

I'll admit that I'm intoxicated by far East Asian and southeast Asian physical beauty and by the countries and countries of all Far East and southeast Asian ethnicities. But that doesn't mean I don't see beauty in other races, ethnicities/nationalities of color. I was spare the brainwashing of the western world and therefore don't see anything in white Caucasian girls that attract me. But I see much beauty in the Mediterranean mid eastern and south Asian Caucasian girls whom I consider girls/women of color as well.

Negro women are victims of a double edged sword wielded by a system the purposely puts them down and demonizes them via mass media, never showing them in best looks or light, favorable or positive situations or circumstances while promoting and forcing white Caucasian women in the opposite. Asian women actually get the similar double edged shaft in the real world which doesn't include online dating sites. You don't see many Asian women positively portrayed or promoted in every phase of media presentation either. Though a bit more than negro women. Or brown:black Latinas either. Or darker south Asians or mid eastern women. But! Many men find negro, Mongol and darker Caucasian women and Latinas attractive and desirable anyway despite them not being promoted in positively like white Caucasian women. They obviously don't need the forced brainwashed imagery tactics to be considered beautiful, attractive and desirable. I prefer Asian and other women of yellow to beige to brown to black colors and no media system forced that on me. That's me seeing free of predisposition and decided for myself. Thinking for myself. If i see an attractive negro woman of dark color and I'm physically at attracted, I know that it's my own unbiased assessment of what see unfiltered or influenced by lifetime of western world preprogramming. It has to be because this type of female has never been positively promoted or forced on anyone. That goes the same when I'm attracted to Asian and other women of color. They've never been positively promoted or forced by any media imagery tactics either.

When men prefer women of color it's genuine. The why part is per person. .

[Gojira]

By the way... these stereotypes opinions about Asian women are hilarious. Those about black women are less funny. But all show than none here know very many black or native born and raised Asian women. As I said I basically grew up with them so these comments are outrageously funny. I work and go to school with many negro women and no two are alike in attitude, looks or even skin color. I'd never be able to say "black women are... this or that blah blah!" Asian women either they further generalize and stereotype by even trying.

No one can answer your question for all men. Only for themselves based on their own experiences and in most cases unless they are Asian from Asian countries (when it comes to Asian women) will be extremely limited.

[Anonymous]

Physically speaking, I prefer black women to Asians. I mean, not that race really matters but Asians don't have any feminine assets - no boobs, no butts, no long legs, no wide hips - they're so short and skinny and curvless (no offense to any Asian ladies reading this). The only issue I have with black women is that they are so touchy about their race and everything is offensive. It's okay if they straighten their hair, but if a white girl does Afro hairstyle, they get offended. If someone is wearing a costume that traditionally belongs to another culture, with no bad intentions whatsoever, they get offended. Everything becomes about race, everything is interpreted that way and you have to watch every word you say because they might perceive it as inappropriate. Now of course, it's their right to do so and I'm not denying that it's more difficult to be a black woman than a white one, and those are issues that need to be addressed but if she's gonna make everything about her being a victim then it's something that kinda puts me off. I'm sorry if that seems insensitive, but I'm just being honest. I'd still choose a black girl over Asian one.

[fivecaratfake]

Maybe sometime you could sit down with a black woman and talk to her about why she's touchy about her race. I hope all people realize that when people are touchy or defensive about something, it's never for no reason or them just being "sensitive" especially if a whole race of women share this touchiness. You have to understand we've been called nappy headed, ugly, "too ethnic" and compared to women of other races with our hair all of our lives and our grandmother's lives. Hair is a huge deal for black women and it's for a reason. We don't always get a fair portryal in the media and that is sometimes all people who are not black have seen or experienced of us. And that makes them judge us as individuals before even knowing us as individuals. And that would be hard for any woman.

[Amanda75]

I think it's the stereotype of Asian women being submissive, loyal, and feminine. I think it's the stereotype of black women being loud, ghetto, aggressive, masculine, etc.

It's wrong that we're judged like this. Some of them probably had a bad experience with a black women and that just made them not like us all.. I don't know.

I also find that guys think that black women from other countries are more appealing. I'm Jamaican and when guys hear my accent they look at me like I'm bacon lol.

Truth is, there's good and bad in every race and nationality.

[KHaskins]

I'm white, and I've always been more attracted to women outside my race, be they Asian, black, or middle eastern. I've actually been in a relationship with a Syrian woman for close to a year.

The thing is, though, we go through public school having it relentlessly drilled into us that we're the villians in race relations, exploring all the reasons everyone else has to resent us, that we should feel guilty for the actions of previous generations and spend our lives apologizing for them. There's a bit of a perception that, being white, you or people in your family would hate us on general principle (there is, unfortunately, enough outspokenly racist grievance-mongers out there keeping this perception alive).

This can, of course, prove wrong, but in many cases it dissuades guys from pursuing anything in the first place (I was worried about this with my girlfriend's family owing to my religion and nationality before she introduced them; they were actually more open to the relationship than my own family was).

I suppose you could say that our secret was that we ignored the issue of race altogether. It's seriously never come up, not once, in the course of our relationship. As it should be. I think it's only really an issue if someone in the relationship chooses to make it an issue.

[fivecaratfake]

It is ironic that as a black woman "There's a bit of a perception that, being white, you or people in your family would hate us on general principle (there is, unfortunately, enough outspokenly racist grievance-mongers out there keeping this perception alive)." this statement feels true for us too when we date outside our race. I've been kept from meeting my boyfriend's family because his grandparents "wouldn't understand" or his mom and dad "love black people but not for their son"

[KHaskins]

I'm sorry for your situation. I've gotten a certain amount of grief over my relationship, due to the religious difference instead of race. She and I recognize the absurdity of a lot of these things people fight over. I'm afraid some of the more outspokenly islamophobic members of my family would refuse to even meet her, and that's led me to question whether it's fair to her to perpetuate the relationship.

Thing is, though, as I see it, if they don't want to be part of what you share with your person, that's off on them. If their reasoning against it is rooted in prejudice instead of concrete objections, you shouldn't have to maintain a front of sharing their prejudice to maintain a relationship with them. That's their shame, their loss.

[Anonymous]

I've seen that data. Maybe keep in mind the response rate black women get is still much higher than the response rate -any- men get, so it's not so bad ;)

One thing that I wish that data split out was response rates by race and by weight. I know that a higher proportion of black women are overweight in the US. If I remember right, a very low percent of Asian women are. So the difference in response rates that an Asian woman and a black woman who are in similar shape is almost certainly smaller and may be hardly noticeable.

I think there is an 'outgoing' factor but it kicks in more in person. A lot of guys like outgoing women. But they find it hard to pick up women who are more outgoing than they are. I suspect that makes some types of interracial dating -easier- which is not the same as preferred.

There are also different cultural expectations of what's a normal amount of argument versus compromise, what's yelling versus what's passion and caring. That's not just skin color either: Scandinavians and spaniards are pretty different. I don't think that stops people from dating though. But we all might need to work a little harder to see how people are feeling or reacting and think about how we express ourselves and listen to each other.

[Anonymous]

Personally its because I am not attracted to black women at all, sorry but thats just how it is. I am attracted to white women the most, because I am a white man, and so thats who I naturally want to be with. Asian women are very beautiful as well, they are very traditional, come from a very ancient and unique culture, their family values are generally very strong, they are very cute and generally not as opinionated as Western women (white or black). Black women just dont really have any of these traits. Broadly speaking 60-70% of black families are divorced so the majority have messed up family values, I do not find African culture interesting, especially compared to Asian culture which I think is so much more interesting, Asian women look younger then they are and more innocent, black women on the other hand usually look older then they are and aren't as cute looking, Asian women are usually pretty easy going, while a lot (not all) of black women are high strung, or more demanding/controlling. Asian women are more traditional, black women are generally more progressive, so if you prefer the traditional type, then Asian women are the way to go. That being said, I know I just generalized, and I know some lowlife is going to comment and claim all these generalizations are wrong, and I say to those people: No your wrong. I have met a lot of Asians, a lot of blacks, and a lot of whites, I lived in Japan for 5 years, I know a lot more about Asian women then most other Westerners. These are completely accurate based off of my observations, and for the record the Asian women I am referring to DID NOT GROW UP IN THE US, I am talking about Asians who were born and raised in East Asia.

Bottom line though, I am just not attracted to black women, I am sorry, I am sure you can find a nice black guy, or white guy that likes black girls, but as for me I am not attracted to blacks at all, and this is probably the same for a lot of the guys you encounter online.

[fivecaratfake]

Do you think maybe you are a little biased since you lived in Japan for 5 years and not in say Nigeria or Sudan or somewhere where you could experience all facets of African life/women?

You don't need to apologize to me for not liking black women, I am positive I would not like you either as I prefer men who are open minded and who love women of all types and colors.

[Opinion Owner]

I wouldn't say I am biased, because I was born in Chicago and lived there until I moved to Japan. My school was about 60% black, so there were plenty of black women around, I was just never attracted to them. We were forced to learn African history in school, and I just didn't like it at all, so its not like I dont know about blacks. Even still, I am attracted to Hispanic women just as much as Asian women even though I have never been to a Spanish speaking country, my school didn't have many hispanics, but I would be interested in moving to a Spanish country, and interested in dating a Hispanic girl. To contrast that, I have zero interest in moving to Nigeria, like none at all, but I would be completely cool with moving to Chile or Mexico. I think it is just my natural reaction, when I see a black girl I am not attracted, but Asians or Hispanics seem very attractive to me.

[Anonymous]

For the longest time I found all races except for Asian attractive mostly because Asian girls were shorter and more petite while I like curvy women not fat but curvy then I eventually saw some cute Asian girls and agreed that all races are beautiful I used to like white women the most growing up because that's what seen the most in the media as beautiful but once I grew up I liked beautiful curvy tall black women the best and now the beauty of each rave has grown on me black women are still some of the most beautiful women in my opinion.
s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/.../...99f984294b.jpg

[Curmudgeon]

There is a good essay on this, titled "Is Love Colorblind?" by Steve Sailer. He points out that while there is a greater tolerance of interracial relationships than ever, Mr. Sailer observes that White male / East Asian female couples are 3x more likely than the converse, and Black male / White female couples are also 3x more likely than the converse. He suspects it has something to do with perceived femininity among other aspects. (Note that East Asian females tend to be higher achieving, so in *that* respect you can't call them "submissive").

In literature, Terry McMillan wrote "Waiting to Exhale", a novel reflecting the frustrations of Black females finding decent Black males who would have anything to do with them, with similar themes and frustrations.

[Curmudgeon]

Black females trying to find decent Black males that is, pardon the grammar typos.

[Jay-Are]

I read about the Asian stereotype. Personally I don't like that submissive thing of any woman of any race. And as far as I know none of my fiends like that as well.

The same goes for the black stereotype. Having an attitude kills my attraction for any woman of any race.

I don't judge by stereotype by the way. I judge her by what I see from her. I like confident outspoken women which is a totally different thing than having an attitude. For me a woman has to be independent to have a relationship with. Her race is not important to me.

[Bandit74]

There is something called neotny, it refers to the retention of youthful feature into adulthood. There have been studies that suggest that men are more attracted to neotenous faces and that faces rated with low neoteny are perceived as morre intimidating.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Neoteny

Supposedly, Asians are, on average, more neontynous than other races and that blacks arre the least. This could explain why Asian women get more attention, while Asian men and Black women get less.

I am by no means an expert on this, so if youve got an open mind, Id recomend you do your own research.

[reptocarl]

I'm going to be real frank here and just because I'm giving the reason doesn't mean I personally feel this way. Asians, Pacific islanders have an exotic appealing look to them and the submissiveness is a draw to some. African Americans do have a "you owe me" attitude and are way too sensitive about anything to do with their race. They try to be as anti white as possible with their speech and accents. Their actions are way different and its such a different culture. Blacks in other parts of the world like Europe talk and act like everyone else and don't have the sensitivity or attitude.

[fivecaratfake]

Do you feel that black people in america should "talk and act" like the majority, which is statistically white? Why do you feel that way?

[reptocarl]

It shows there's commonality and no racial lines. African Americans alienate themselves by trying to be so anti majority. When in Rome...

[fivecaratfake]

Or perhaps they are just enjoying and celebrating their difference and their culture. What's wrong with that? You have to understand that black people in this country have actually fought and lost loved ones in the struggle to be black, free, and respected, so it makes sense that they'd want to celebrate and express who they are in their culture and not act like everyone else, especially not act like a culture that doesn't always accept them.

[reptocarl]

But that shows they're not accepting of the majority. They're thumbing your nose at the establishment and alienating themselves

[openwide]

I traveled to Asia, while being there, yes you can say Asian girls are nice, still they are no match for white or black women in my opinion. Why I don't like about them is the body, they don't have the typical female body, more like a non-muscular male.

White and black girls are much better looking with wider hips and bigger breasts.

[OpenWine]

Well what I don't like is arrogant women or ones who think too highly of themselves and I know some black girl who are like that (well I know those from every race and so on).
I generally find black girls tending to be less attractive cause of the fake hair and more masculine faces from time to time.
I only saw one hot black girl who kept her natural hair in a while. I also have seen some ugly Asians not worth mentioning, some hot Asians who were arrogant af and turned me off real fast and some cutie I didn't ask the number for 😭

[LorcaNovena]

I like Black women just as much as I like Asian women. The difference? Asian women show me attention, Black women just walk straight past me as if I don't exist. I can't pursue Black women if they don't show any interest in me, I need a sign or a signal of interest, so I can pursue.

[Anonymous]

i have had Asian, black, and white girlfriends. and let me tell you. you are racist. it's not about the color of the skin or how submissive you claim they are taught to be. don't get me wrong though, we are all racist. because i happen to think that Asian girls are annoying. black girls kinda smell and taste different. and white girls age really really fast. oh well. pick your poison.

[Anonymous]

We must over black chics with huge booty and big lips. Not skinny Asian girls.
Black girls are the best. They are lazy and put out anytime. Really like to take care of their man. Even if it means taking one for the team and doing all our bros ( at party's ect)
Line up momma

[Neuromancer22689]

Most of us white guys see black girls with only black men. It's really hard for me to think of a time when I saw a white boy/black girl couple, but I definitely see white girl/black man sometimes. I think a lot of white guys probably think they can't measure up to a black girl, if you know what I mean. lol

[OrangeBoy]

I share your opinion, the "fragile, submissive" Asian.
I have to agree, i prefer, Asians and white woman... (im latin white portuguese) but that doesn't mean that i don't like black girls, i like the independent and confident type also.

So yes, im one of them. i like atitute.

[Anonymous]

It's a ghetto mentality, not exclusive to black women but most black women I've seen are ghetto, ratchet hoes. I know plenty of white bitches like that too but they all pothead wastes of life, at least when black girls be like that sometimes they got they shit together.

[meatballs21]

Asian women are little, cute, submissive things.

Black women are big, angry and ratchet.

These are both generalizations, but so is your question.

[Anonymous]

Stereotyping has caused this to happen. I have met plenty of sweet black women, and an equal amount Asian women with an attitude. I like when a woman is intelligent, confident and kind, but can be outspoken when she needs to be.

[Gojira]

Alas! Someone who thinks for himself.

[FakeName123]

Men are physically attracted to fertility, health and YOUTH. Asian girls usually look younger than they actually are (at least to westerners).

Now you just gotta do 1+1.

[Goldie757]

I don't think that's it as black people tend to look younger than they are.

[FakeName123]

@Goldie757

They might look younger than they are, but they aren't young+innocent kind of young-looking like Asians are.

There is a difference between looking younger than you are and looking young per se.

[annoyymouse]

I think a lot of it has to do with stereotypes that you mentioned in your question. I don't think there's really anything truth to them, but a lot of guys think there is