He is going to a wedding without me

[Jocelyn2010]

I have been together with my boyfriend for almost 8 months now. On this weekend he will be going to a friend's wedding and did not ask me to go with him. Does that mean he is not serious with me or he does not want to show me to his friends? Or is he going there to hit on other girls?

Thanks for your answer

Updates

+1 y

To be honest, I won't talk to him about that, since he will think I am needy, clingy or insecure. But I guess I an going to do the same thing to him, which means going to a party without so he can understand better how it hurts.

Updates

+1 y

I mean honestly, he is the one who does not want me to go out without him and since I did not want to hurt him I did not go to parties without him. Now he is doing it. Sometimes I don't understand guys.

Updates

+1 y

Ok, one thing I did not mention is that he actually knows 3 or 4 people on the wedding. Could that be one reason? I mean that he feels uncomfortable?

[xraygurl]

Not sure how long ago this was posted, but here is my feed back anyway.
I'm in the same boat. I have been with my boyfriend for 5 months now and I have known about his friend's wedding for a while. And a few days ago found out that it is in just a few days, and that he is going to the wedding. He didn't offer to take me as a plus one either... and at first I was a little disappointed. (Because when we first started dating and I found out two of his friends were engaged I was secretly hoping I would get an invite and get to go. So to find out that it was already happening this soon and not to get to go I was kind of bummed.)
But to be fair I never meet these friends, or any of the other friends of his going to this wedding and my boyfriend is the kind of guy that doesn't like making people feel left out or uncomfortable. So he probably didn't want to make me feel uncomfortable not knowing anyone but him, and he probably felt if I went he would have to stay back with me instead of having a good time with his friends at this wedding he has been looking forward to. So if I went either I would end up left out, or his friends would be ignored because of me. That's my logic at least. And it actually makes sense. I guess I would feel the same way. But still i think it could have been a nice way to get to know all his buds... and have him share me.

[Nessa19]

I would suggest for you to just be honest with him and talk to him about it. I been dating my boyfriend for 8 months too and he takes me almost everywhere. Mabe is because he wants it to be a him thing. I don't know they are times my boyfriend would go out with his friend and me stay home. It could be that he don't want you to feel weird. So is something I would just talk with calmly. Don't think is anyhing bad becsuse then that is all you will be thinking about.

[Jocelyn2010]

Thank you for the nice answer, it helps me a lot.

[Butterfly_kisses09]

That's kinda weird since you've been together 8 months. But maybe he didn't invite you because he figured you wouldn't know anyone there since it's his friend and if he knows a lot of people there then he would be talking to all of them so maybe he just didn't want you to feel uncomftorable or left out and that's why. But that's just my opinion so you should just ask him and see what he says.

[Jocelyn2010]

I really think, if you love someone you just want to take this person everywhere. But of course you might be right too, since he said that beside 3 people he actually does not know anyone. So maybe he really does not feel comfortable taking me there.

[SgtvonMinden]

Don't be immature like that. He did it to you? So you will do it to him? Are you kidding? You are obviously not mature enough to handle a real relationship. Maybe this is why he doesn't want to bring you to the wedding.

There are obviously things here that you haven't said, and because of those things, none of what anyone says will help you.

Anyways, what would you do while there anyways? You wouldn't know anyone. You would feel incredibly awkward and cling by his side while he mingles with his friends/acquaintances. You are not thinking of the whole picture. Just about what perceived wrongs he has made against you.

[Jocelyn2010]

Thanks for your answer. I guess you are right. But you see everything logical right now. What about feelings? If he really liked me he would invite me, that for sure. Don't you think?

[SgtvonMinden]

It's not about feelings with guys. He is saving you the hassle of going to a wedding, one of the most dreadful things a man can go to. Only thing worse is a funeral.

If he doesn't invite you to go out to the movies, dinner, or some festival and he goes by himself. Worry then, but from what it sounds like, he is saving you the hassle which shows that he cares about you.

[errorprone]

Weddings are anyway one of the most boring parties you could go to, no reason to not take you along. If he barely knows people there then that is an even stronger reason to take you with him. The best thing to do is talk. The going to a party without him option exists as well, but honestly its a little immature and feels more like revenge. Best option, talk...ask him why he's not invited you. Make it a very casual question.

[kalg8]

Another thing to conider..every guest at a wedding costs the bride and groom $$. He may have beeen invited as a single, not as a "Mr.x & guest". Bringing extra people univited to a wedding can be a financial and organizational nightmare for whoever is running the wedding. Perhaps he RSVPed before you were dating or serious. You will never know unless you ask. If bringing up a concern of yours would cause him to label you as needy or clingy, then perhaps neither of you are mature enough to be in a realtionship. If you want this to last, you MUST be able to talk out concerns or problems!

[Hammy]

I can't say exactly what his reason is for not inviting you, because only he knows that. But I can say for sure that it seems a bit odd for him not to invite you. You've been dating for 8 months, so it's not like it's a brand new relationship. I would suggest that you ask him about it and see what he says. Communication is the key to a good relationship.

[Jocelyn2010]

To be honest, I won't talk to him about that, since he will think I am needy, clingy or insecure. But I guess I an going to do the same thing to him, which means going to a party without him so he can understand better how it hurts.

[beach_chick]

same situation but we've only been together a month. but he has met both of my parents. I wish at the very least he would invite me to the rehearsal dinner. I'm upset. I think he does not want me to meet his family.

[Anonymous]

he should have invited you.