What will hurt him more if I cut him out or show him I've moved on, I'm heartbroken and want to get him back

well I've been with a guy in a messy relationship for a long time he has done some nasty things to me but like manipulitive men he destroyed my confidence so I took him back thinking I couldn't do better and was so in love (stupidly I know).

ive since moved away and he has broke my heart for the last time, made me feel inferior to other women for the last time,im still really hurt but I am moving on. Now I know I shouldn't want pay back and forgiveness is the best remedy yada yada yada, but this guy literally has done some evil things to me and what would be the best pay back, to completely delete him from my life, number Facebook etc? or to keep in contact but at arms length and show him I've moved on hot guys, new job etc...thanks guys


Most Helpful Guy

  • He's still mercilessly controlling you, even post break-up. Only this time, its your own choice.

    I'm sure you've heard the phrase "living well is the best revenge." There is a lot of truth to that. Only you shouldn't move on to make him jealous; you should move on for the sake of your own happiness. Men can tell the difference between showing off/ignoring for desperation's sake, and just plain indifference because the girl really has moved on for her own benefit.

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      i know this but I do really intend on moving on, but as a final payback what would be better show my happiness or delete him from my life. from a guys perspective what would bother you most?

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      Neither, I'd be expecting one or the other. But like I mentioned before, if you showed complete genuine indifference to me, I'd be confused, and probably curious. Don't purposely see him or put yourself in a position to see him. But if you do happen to bump into him, be nice, but keep it very brief, and don't say anything negative. But most importantly of all, don't invite any future contact. He'll wonder why you were nice, but didn't pursue anything.