Why are so many young women vulgar?

I've been noticing a trend with a lot of younger women these days being vulgar where there is no need to be. As a man, using foul language is something I generally reserve for when I'm REALLY angry with a justifiable cause. Spouting off obscenities reeks of immaturity or lack of a proper vocabulary, or both.

Here are two examples in the last week that took me off guard:

1. I was engaging a 18 year old girl in a debate about politics. She was actually fairly well-read on the subject matter at hand. Out of nowhere, she says "what the f***" I need to register to vote. There was no point that she could have made without that comment. Why be so vulgar?

2. There was a girl I was chatting with online. After a while, I told her she looked like a chipmunk with smiley face. (She was a fairly attractive girl.) She just lost it. "What the f*** is your problem!?!?" We had a decent conversation prior to that, but after her expletive-laced outburst, she left the conversation not to return.

I strongly encourage those ladies out there that are seeking a decent man to stop cursing like sailors. It doesn't make you sexy. In fact, even though my male friends and I will let off the off-colored remark in private, we never make a point of saying anything like that in front of strangers, or use it as an excuse to blow your top like girl number 2.

Is it too much to ask for girls to cut down on the cursing?

  • I curse a lot
    40% (27)2% (1)24% (28)Vote
  • I speak like a lady
    12% (8)4% (2)8% (10)Vote
  • I speak like a lady (most of the time)
    45% (30)0% (0)25% (30)Vote
  • Men Click Here (results)
    3% (2)94% (49)43% (51)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy
Updates:
Lessons learned:


1. Girls want to curse for a variety of reasons.

2. There seems to be no context for when or why you should let loose.

3. Don't ever playfully tease a girl on her looks, even when she refers to your face as a brillo pad and you laugh it off first and think nothing of it.

4. Even the most beautiful girls are very insecure, perhaps more so than average girls.

5. When in doubt, see number 1.

1|1
38|8

Most Helpful Guy

  • I can see both sides of the argument. One that you can appear to be vulgar when it is completely unnecessarily to do so, also that you're just automatically assuming you aren't going to offend the other person you just met with the strong language you're using. On the other hand, I believe that "magic words" or "bad words" is a pretty silly concept in general. And although that's true I find myself hypocritical in the fact that I don't personally appreciate when girls speak like this and also the ones that do I find are always a little bit angrier / crazier. Then again, it depends on the type of guy you're going after... some guys might love it.

    4|1
    • Judging by the poll, it appears that we are in the minority. I am a strong believer against censorship, but due believe in self-regulation. Judging by most of the comments, the "anything goes" mentality regardless of circumstances appears to be in. If equality means picking up on what was once traditionally a lower-class male form of expression and mainstreaming it for both guys and girls, I'm not sure how this is a victory. If our President or other leaders spoke like this all the time...

    • I think it depends a lot on upbringing and social circles as well. My girl curses more than I do, but I can tell you makes a conscious effort not to when she's around me and the odd time she lets something slip out I actually find it kind of funny. It's when that's every second word out of someone's mouth, or when it's just inappropriate circumstances when it bothers me.

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What Girls Said 38

  • "2. There was a girl I was chatting with online. After a while, I told her she looked like a chipmunk with smiley face. (She was a fairly attractive girl.) She just lost it. "What the f*** is your problem!?!?" We had a decent conversation prior to that, but after her expletive-laced outburst, she left the conversation not to return."

    -OMG How did I miss this one? You were rude to say that and then ridiculous to be appalled that she asked you what the f*** your problem was. What the f*** IS your problem? Really, you can't be rude yourself and have the hypocrisy to ask women to speak more politely. Why don't you take your own advice? You want people to quit cursing, but it sounds as if you could use a few lessons on tact yourself. You give off the vibe that you're pompous, arrogant and a stick-in-the-mud. If that is the kind of guy that cursing turns off then more girls should say f***, sh*t, ****, skoobededoobop, a**hole, bitch, etc, etc, lol

    5|0
    • I never asked people to quit cursing, but merely pointed out that I think it should be contextual. A bad joke (and I'll admit, not every attempt at humor is a winner) is reason enough to let loose with the cannon. Perhaps you missed the part where she called my face a "brillo pad" FIRST. I didn't really take offense to that, but merely thought she wanted to kid around harshly, which is a game I don't mind playing. Even admitting my humor-fail, she was the one with the first crass comment. Why?

    • Show All
    • The cursing to me honestly matters less than the fact she had such thin skin. Prior to that point, we were having a great conversation. One remark just derailed her and man alive, there was no way on earth was that train getting back on the track. I honestly feel sad that she probably thinks I thought her looks to be less-than-satisfactory. She huffed and puffed away mad, while all I feel is pity for an angry girl who didn't want to finish what she started. Thin skin!

    • It was a harmless sarcastic joke. A chipmunk with a smile = LIGHT JOKE. Are girls the ones to use jokes on guys, while the guy takes it and kisses her butt with compliments? I can only wonder where the FEMININE girls have gone ... the ones who are caring, funny, and secure enough to enjoy jokes with the opposite gender.

  • society has become more and more vulgar. I will cuss every now and then but I don't like saying sh*t like that in public because well its just not cute but I do cuss every now and then. there's a balance, too much cussing just makes you look ignorant but a few words here and there isn't a big deal. it depends on your setting

    1|0
    • In general, I'll agree with the being more vulgar period comment.

  • LOL! I love the numbered summary. Pretty accurate too. The average girls tend to be made of stronger "stuff" that the fragile beauties towards whom guys usually tend to migrate. My favorite is "5. When in doubt, see number 1."

    Funny you should mention the brillo pad comment. Guys will laugh something like that off a little more easily than many girls, but they also know to aim at certain comments about a person's looks. For example, my friend M** has a really large sort of nose. Personally, I think it looks good on him because it suits his face. It's pat of a "rugged" look he's got going on. Anyhow, his FB friends made some comments that would have really stung me if they'd been directed my way, but he just laughed it off and called them A***s, then let it drop. He even made it his profile pic on purpose. I asked him if it had hurt his feelings and he just sort of shrugged it off. It's the sort of remark he'd heard since he was a little kid.

    I have a long nose -- yeah, it suits my face now, since I have high cheekbones and "massive eyes," but when I was a kid I'd come home crying because the guys at school would make fun of my nose. If I was on the school steps, they'd sit a few steps under me... "in the shade of that nose" -- I can shake my head about it now and just chalk it up to being stupid kids, but back then it wasn't so funny and I shoved the guy off the school steps (then smoothed out my skirt because I'm a lady, lol). No cursing. ;-)

    My point is that women take things to heart (rather differently than guys might). We're all very expressive in our own way. Some people are demonstrative (baking, playful nudges, turning away) and others are very verbal. The cursing is an unfortunate side thing that's developed as a result of increased sociological expectations -- and, I would say, spending so much time around guys in settings that guys would normally "let loose" and curse...

    1|1
  • 1. Why are so many young women vulgar?

    While because in my country America the society is vulgar.

    2. Why be so vulgar? Freedom of speech, vulgar society, and probably because she's young. You can't talk to most young people without them cursing. Most guys can't go

    3. Is it too much to ask for girls to cut down on the cursing?

    Is it too much to ask for guys to stop trying to control or 'strongly encourage' the behavior of women with actions that aren't illegal? Probably and American men have generally shown that to be a conclusive yes. People will do what they want and as long as it isn't illegal no need to dictate it.

    "I strongly encourage those ladies out there that are seeking a decent man to stop cursing like sailors. "

    I strongly encourage guys out there that are seeking a beautiful girl to stop expecting her to overlook your lack of physical attractiveness because you're so nice and to be hot or rich. Probably won't happen because people can and will do what they want as long as it's not illegal...or even if it's illegal for some people.

    2|0
  • I don't necessarily think that is something only women do. And the fact that you do it in private, doesn't change the fact that you do. Some people use slang and curse words as part of conversation, and a way of expressing emotions. It seems that the media has really influenced many people. You hear it in music and movies all the time. I don't think it is viewed as a rude act anymore, but rather a way of expression (whether positive or negative). People don't say dang and shoot, they say f*k and sh*t. I think it would take a large social movement to influence a movement to be more 'polite'. Even you, swearing in private, creates a sense of acceptance. Among your friends, if you do not all share the same beliefs, then how do you know they don't curse in public EVER? If you became close with those girls, and swore around them, how do you know they wouldn't feel it was acceptable everywhere because they heard it from you?

    3|0
    • Even in private, I don't curse unless I'm very mad. Personally, if a word or phrase becomes so common that it no longer has a meaning, when you really want to use it, it seems to be diluted, no?

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    • I think you might be on to something. On a daily basis, I read a ton. My Kindle is full. Vocab is interesting to me, including swear words. It is just when they are tossed around without any care, it seems like an abuse of language, not just something that might offend someone else.

    • The thing is that it's all perspective. People are raised in a number of different ways. Peer groups and media are what influence youth significantly. What about parents who curse or swear in public? The thing is, the words are said, without explanation. Meaning is taken away from them because of that, and make it much easier to throw in.

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What Guys Said 8

  • sh*t, I clicked "i curse a lot" lmao I didn't see (men click here) foook I feel like a tard

    0|0
    • why would you admit that lol now we all know the moron who did it! hahaha jk

    • lol I don't care...i messed up, oh well

      thumbs down from someone too? really...lmao people are strange hahahaahahha

    • at least I wasn't the guy who voted "i speak like a lady" LMFAO

  • I've noticed this and agree with everything you said... I've concluded that a lot of young people think it's cool.

    Ya know what I think would be cool? A girl who is beautiful and all that, but actually acts like a lady and shows a more developed sense of character, and that she's different than all the rest... Definitely the kind of woman I want to get to know...

    2|2
    • DItto.

      Women who curse a lot strike me as crass and unrefined. As a wise man once said, “Profanity is the weapon of the witless.”

    • *bbbbuuuurrrrrppppp*

      just kidding... XD

    • Haha, I can most definitely deal with burping... ;)

  • Hey there TheDigitalStaint. Here is what a 19 year old chick I know had to say.

    "Tell him to chill the f*** out f***ing hell I'll say whatever I damn please and if he doesn't like it he can suck d*** f*** man f*** f***."

    1|0
  • Pfft. A word is nothing more than a meaningless sequence of sounds. Meaning and connotation are deciphered upon contextualization. So "bad words" are a myth. A word cannot have a motivation nor a desire - it's all about how you say it.

    Plus, chicks who say and do what they want are sexy.

    4|0
  • Wow. I haven't heard something like this in a long time now. I don't know the word in English, but the concept is "machista" in Spanish, that's the opposed concept to a feminist. Looks like an opinion from someone who lived in the XIX century, when women were thought as property of men (by men of course) still and men dictated the forms. "girls need to talk nice and behave themselves"; "Men should only curse when appropriate".

    What the hell is wrong with you dude? Humans are humans regardless of their gender and there's nothing wrong with expressing your ideas with whatever language you use. Those words you don't like constitute a part of your language as well, and they express very specific concepts. Why not use them? what's so wrong about them?

    Here are my opinions on your two examples.

    1. That was just an expression. Yes, she could have used other words, but she probably didn't mean any offense, just expressed herself.

    2. You called her a chipmunk? I mean, you compared her to a tiny animal, or to the annoying animated version of that animal? Come on dude...there's no way that can sound as something nice unless she knows you well enough to understand you intended it to be cute.

    As long as you see the universe parted in MALE and FEMALE as opposed to just one thing with two equal parts, you won't get stuff like this

    5|0
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