How do I stop missing someone who doesn't miss me in return?

My ex broke my heart in August 2013; I took him back for a couple months (Nov-Feb) and he left again. I've tried moving on; I meet with a therapist weekly, I am on anxiety/depression meds, I workout often, got back into my hobbies, etc, but I still miss him like crazy. I thought he was the one..

The worst part — I know he doesn't give a damn about me, and likely doesn't miss me at all. He had a new girlfriend three weeks after leaving me in February . Am I pathetic? Advice for letting go? I feel like I'm never going to find love again :(


Most Helpful Guy

  • That is a good question to witch there are many answers. First off realize that you did nothing wrong he has something inside of him that made him feel inadequate, and he tried to fix that by hurting you. Secondly you may ask your self why you why out of every one did he have to do it to you well that's simple you were an easy target for him to essentially use to make himself feel better about him and he had already done it once so the second time was easier. Thirdly no not all men are like him and just because he did something bad doesn't mean the next guy will to; both men and women can be cruel in your case it was a man. Forth except that he is not a part of your life and that yes you are better off with out him and know that he will regret hurting you because now he has no one that will really care for him like you did. Fifthly instead of taking your frustration out on yourself take it out on something you can do for you go punch a punching bag get angry that he did something bad to you, go buy a bb-gun put a pic of him up and shoot it for a wile, go do things that will let you put the frustration of him hurting you on something other than yourself. Sixth realize that him leaving you was the best thing for you. You don't need someone that will not only hurt you once, but twice. That being said know you are the bigger person for giving him a second chance with you and it really is his fault for hurting you. People do deserve second chances sometimes it's his loss and your gain in this situation though. Now take some deep breaths be single for a wile enjoy the freedom vent some frustration out on other things rather than yourself and live for a better tomorrow because you can make it threw this. Hope this helps you feel better and helps you move on and live better for you.

    • Most of all no you are not pathetic if anything your strong because unlike many out there you are asking for help ad trying to deal.

    • You will find love It takes time and practice to weed threw some of the bad ones and even if you find good ones they may just not be right for you. so be patient and more likely than not love will find you.

Most Helpful Girl

  • Whoah this sounds exactly like what happened to me last year. Was with my ex for a year, my first proper relationship, thought he was the one and I put my all into the relationship. Then suddenly he says he's not sure whether there is a future with us.
    We broke up, 3 weeks later he got a new girlfriend just like yours did, and he didn't give flying crap about me. I was broken inside.
    I know exactly what you are going through hun. It hurts and it hurts bad.
    You are not pathetic, you have been used and hurt, This is a normal reaction.
    I suffered depression for about 7 months afterwards. I went to the doctor and went on meds, my family had never seen me so ill. I have never felt so awful in my life. It was like I was in a deep black hole, that I just could not climb out of. I even attempted suicide.
    I couldn't stop thinking about it, how badly he treated me and how much he used me for an entire year. He even made out to others I was the bad guy.

    Now the good news. It has been 10 months on from my break up and I completely better, I feel free of him and I rarely think of him. I know I was lucky to escape him and you were lucky to escape yours.

    You will get better trust me. You need to take each day at a time and do what you are doing. You are a wonderful person and this will only make you stronger.

    I feel a lot stronger and I have learned a lot from that relationship. I will never let anyone treat me like that ever again. I bet there were some warning signs at the beginning of your relationship, but you chose to ignore them, just like me.

    You will be fine, and great things will come your way. Forget this a hole, clearly he can never be on his own. A guy like that is a bore and pathetic.

    Take Care of yourself, You WILL get through this.

    • I can relate to a lot of what you said. I too thought about ending it bc I didn't think life was worth living. I remember collapsing on my bathroom floor, barely being able to breath and just sobbing. Thank you for your words, and I also wish you the best. There has to be someone out there for each of is who is caring, considerate and wants to be with is for unselfish reasons!

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What Guys Said 5

  • Are you pathetic? NO

    Advice for Letting go...
    Just continue what you are doing. It's a process that takes time. And consider that while you broke up in August that spell from Nov to Feb kind of set you back in terms of the healing process. Know that you absolutely will feel love again, but for the time being immerse yourself in hobbies, friends, family and things that allow you not to think about him. Surround yourself with love and things you enjoy. And just remember that you don't need to find anyone new right now, there is no rush. maybe listen to some good music. my favorite musip always cheers me up

    but just remember it's a process, it takes time, and patience

    • But it's true. This is why rebounds are a thing.

    • Show All
    • Rebound thing can work but it depends on person. For me for example it never ends well. I don't like rebounds.

    • I've had one rebound that worked. I've had rebounds that didn't. Like you said findingdreamland it's depends on the person.

  • Im in that boat now. haven't heard from her in 6 weeks, Im climbing the walls and its taking a toll on me..

  • None of that crap helps. You need to find a new guy to hang out with asap.

  • Forgive him and you will forget him
    thats the rule of life

  • I wish I knew. . I'm in the same boat as you


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