Guys, seriously, why was he ever with her? The ex. Can you explain this to me?

His ex is so totally different from me, and I really don't understand why he was with her. I can't help but wonder if he was for the wrong reasons, and that could be anything. An example is improving his situation, not that she made any more money than him (they were both broke at the time) but it got him out of his parents house and they got a dog and did all that stuff.

She is heavyset and has these huge gauged earrings in her ears and her hair is all funky colors and she's all tattooed, extremely loud and vulgar and a lot of people like her. Other than the funky colors she is blonde and he keeps telling me how much he loves dark hair and dark eyes which is what I have.

I am very thin and fit and have long dark brown hair, I wear designer and fashionable clothes. I'm a bit more reserved personality wise, extremely introverted and I admit it seems like we are a much better match.

But why the heck was he ever with her? She is just too vastly different. They moved in together not long after a year together and then got a dog, which he keeps. They're still "good friends" according to him, and she's in a new relationship now.

In the beginning he used to go out of his way to tell me when he saw her, and I finally spoke up and was like, you talk about her so much. He also used to point out other girls being pretty and all that early on. Now he's totally stopped. Not sure if it was a tactic to make me jealous?

He has been moved back in with his parents for a couple years now and has whined plenty of times about wishing he could afford his own place, and how it would be so much easier with someone else like as in a couple... Interesting.

We aren't dating but I'm on the fence about anything with him. The ex thing still bugs me, and perhaps it still would but it wouldn't perplex me as much if we weren't so different, and it wasn't a fling...


Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • Because he liked her?

    • Omg like did he?

    • Well to be honest here it's a bit of a silly question. Were you looking for something more profound?

What Girls Said 1

  • You said lots of people like her. She may have a great personality. Maybe he fancied her because she pulled him out of his shell. She may be fun and interesting to be around.

    Really, who cares? He's not with her anymore. Obviously things didn't work out. Why don't you ask him? "Your ex is so different from you? What attracted you to her?" It's a normal question to ask. And you'll get a much better answer from the guy than from us.