If a guy breaks it off with a girl and months later she emails or texts to say Hello, does he automatically assume she wants to get back together?

I went out with a guy on a few dates a few months ago before he told me he wanted to try again with his ex. We didn't spend a ton of time together, but what little time we did spend together was amazing. He told me I was sweet and he was so impressed with me.

Anyway, when he told me he was getting back with his ex, I let him know that it sucks for me, but that I wish him all the best. That he's a great guy and I truly hope he's happy, and now I know the type of guy I want to be with. What I told him was sincere, not just what I thought I should say.

Its been 2 months and I was thinking I would send him an email to say Hello and just see how he's doing.

Is that okay? Do you think he'll be happy to hear from me, or will he automatically think I'm only emailing him because I want to get back together?
Because he was the one to break it off, do I have to let him make first contact with me if I want to talk to him again? Regardless of my intention?
When I wished him luck, I told him to drop me an email some time so I know he's doing okay and that I hope he doesn't mind if I do the same.


Most Helpful Guy

  • He already knows you never wanted it to end, yes he will know you want to get back together, even though a few dates is not a relationship in the first place.

    I don't know if this was an online dating thing or something, but email probably isn't the best choice. text seems better.

    If you had sex with him he will probably assume that has something to do with it too.

    • I agree, text is definitely better. One problem, I'm not sure if he has been deployed to Afghanistan again. He's Army and that was one of the things that made it hard. His ex happens to have been stationed with him on the same base a few months ago. Before she came back into the picture, we had planned on seeing each other again. We did have sex, but I thought it meant more than that and I'm not a friends with benefits type. Is it a bad idea to check in with him?

    • Show All
    • Right now I would be. But his ex and him had broken up for over 2 years---I hope I wasn't a rebound girl. Lol! Even in the US we don't live in the same state. After we met and hung out a few times (he was on assignment here), he actually paid for me to fly out and visit him back on his home base because he couldn't go more than 50 miles from base. This was before the ex got stationed there.

    • Well if he went to the lengths of paying for a plane ticket to see you then I don't think an email is unwarranted. It can't hurt to try

Most Helpful Girl

  • I think he might think your emailing him to test the waters?

    • Do you think it's a bad thing to do then. Or might he appreciate it?

    • Mmmmm...well, he might appreciate you touching base and saying hi..just don't have high expectations :) Just in case if he doesn't respond.

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • Yes everytime

    • So does that mean I shouldn't email him? I wouldn't rule it out, but that's not my intention. But I don't want him just to ignore me.

    • No you can contact him but let him know up front why

What Girls Said 1

  • I would assume she wants to get back with me, or she is looking to have sex


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