Why is it that every man I meet cheats on me?

Every single man I meet cheats on me , never treats me right , calls me names or has some kind of mental problem. I'm a very good loyal person but so fed up of this?
Updates:
None of there men have been attractive one was 47 years old !!
Also I don't take there crap I leave them straight away and I'm not needy I let them go out do what they want , they stop me going out and I finish things soon as they cheat but why does it have to come to this

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Your doing what many women do on a daily basis: looking for the wrong type of guy.

    Most men are loyal and kind, but the few who aren't are smart. For example, a friend of mine from high school has always been known for manipulating women. Why? Because he knows what they're looking for.

    Women want attractive men, and attractive men know this. So they take advantage of this. Women also want tough men. Tough men know this, so they take advantage of women.

    You need to start looking for men who actually care about you. I'm sure Mr. Right is watching you in the background, waiting for you to notice him...

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    • None of them have been for looks believe me

    • Why the **** would you date someone in their late 40's? Your in your early 20's!!! Don't date older men! There are TOO many single men your age to be doing that!

Most Helpful Girl

  • Many of today's toms are sporadic, unpredictable, non committal, emotionally unstable, disrespectful, and lie and cheat. You just happen to pick the------Not cream of the crop----- but the diarrhea of dogs.
    They don't want a Real Relationship to begin with, and when they see how sweet, easy and 'loyal' as a pet shop pup that you are, they take advantage of you, and end up screwing you royally.
    Before you start wearing your heart on your sleeve the next time around, feel them out as Friends to start with. Learn More about them. Don't jump into Anything so quickly, that's going to end up being a used and abused treatment.
    And learn to start putting up a guard with yourself. Be a bit more sassy, less sexy. You'll gain more respect.
    Always remember: The apple at the top of the tree is always the hardest to get, and guys love a challenge...They would just as soon climb heaven and earth to get to something they crave, than to stay on the ground and Continue to con and easily conquer. After awhile, they get used to it, and learn to enjoy it.
    Don't be too discouraged Nor be so quick to throw in the towel. Someone is out there More deserving of your goodness, and will come along one day when you least expect it.xx

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What Guys Said 13

  • Somehow, someway, for some reason...
    ...
    ...
    ...
    ...you keep picking douchebags repeatedly.

    ---

    To be honest, very few men have any lick of sympathy for women who get cheated on.

    Why?

    Because women have the FINAL SAY in dating, and she chose the douchebag over another guy (most likely himself) that WOULDN'T cheat on her.

    Therefore she self-inflicted the problem on HERSELF, and she "should've chose better".

    These guys also believe the girl is thinking with her vagina instead of her brain, and deserves less respect and zero sympathy.

    ----

    But I don't think that way.

    Hell...anyone can be deceived. You're just unfortunate imo.

    For your situation, there is a pattern between the guys you choose to date of your potential guy pool (you're a good looking female so I figure you have plenty of choices of men).

    So you have to sit down, think, meditate, and figure out what the common correlation is between all these guys that you dated that ended up cheating.

    ----

    Use that feminine analytical mind of yours and dissect EVERY fact of all these guys: from income, to type of job, to where you met them, from personality traits, to historical events of their lives (if u dated them long enough to know intimate details like that), to hobbies they like to do, where they live, the type of cultural values they have, etc.

    and most importantly,

    do this same analysis on all of their close friends (guys tend to have a "pack mentality" more than girls do IMHO).

    ---

    Hopefully you find a common pattern amongst all these guys, so you can break it and end this cycle of cheating boyfriend.

    ---

    Best of luck! :-D

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  • It means that (so far) you've been bad at choosing men.

    As to how that can be remedied:
    - First of all, you need to assess what it is that you didn't like about them. Think about what it was that tipped you off. Be honest. Write it down. Otherwise, you aren't really learning anything from the experience.
    - It sounds like you probably are easy to abuse, because you are a pushover and put up with it. If people think they can use you, they will. What this means is that you need to call things off at the first sign of abuse. If he cheats, don't take him back. If he calls you names, tell him you won't be disrespected that way and call things off IMMEDIATELY. None of this, "Oh, I'm sorry sweetycakes, I didn't mean it, give me one more chance" etc. Make it clear up front; if you cheat or are abusive, it's over. No takebacks.
    - I repeat this advice a lot, but when you are first getting to know him, watch how he treats other ordinary people, not just you (i.e. waitresses, cab drivers, store clerks, etc.). Too often girls are so focused on how a guy is treating them that they don't notice this sort of thing. Guys that are decent to other people will be even more decent to you. Guys that are rude to other people but seem nice to you are snakes.

    Best of luck.

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  • Most of us, most of the time, will subconsciously choose someone with similar characteristics, issues, or circumstances to date. Why? We prefer to spend our personal time with someone who relates to us, our lives, and our way of thinking.

    Then, there are those who subconsciously seek to date others who will depend on them and cater to their needs. You know, people who can relate to their emotional and dependency issues.

    In your case, your entire history of dating is associated with guys who have commonly betrayed you, cheated on you, and mistreated you. It suggests that you have low self esteem, and therefor, your initial attraction to them was based on what you perceived as similarities.

    In other words, they had problems, and so did you. They were unattractive, and you are not. You wanted to play it safe, and you figured they would be honored to have you.

    Yet, unfortunately, in being submissive and passive, your boundaries became impenetrable. Consequently, they soon began disrespecting you and cheating.

    Contrary to popular belief, respect is commanded, it's not earned.

    Having said that, my advice to you is, self-reflect and resolve your self-esteem issues prior to your next relationship. In doing so, you will be in a better state of mind to consciously and subconsciously choose compatible guys to date.

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    • Maybe your right , these men seem to make me feel rubbish about myself to such as telling me no other man will want me and so on. And yer I guess I am pretty low in confidence maybe that's what it is then

  • Ok, well, one of 2 things. Either you are fishing where you can catch only douche bags and need to find a classier venue to meet men or you are a smothering, baggy, bitch. That chases all the men off. I hope its the first. Take a little bit and evaluate both options honestly then decide. If you have a brutally honest friend ask their input. Once you've ascertained the source of the issue, change it. Pretty simple. Not trying to be a prick, just trying to help.

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  • Most likely... bad luck. But lets ask some questions anyway.

    What's the relationship like beforehand?
    What's their dating history?
    How well do they treat you?
    Do they introduce you to friends and family.

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  • Because you make poor choice stop choosing the guys who dress tough and act though. I know the bad boy can be attractive but unless you want this cycle to continue I suggest you big a guy who is facially attractive and nice.

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    • None of them I have been out with are attractive

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    • I've just had enough of men disrespecting me

    • Good for you nothing wrong with being a widow.

  • I'm sorry about that. This is terrible. I think a lot of people have trouble with dating issues. Maybe try dating someone less exciting.

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  • Probably luck factor. If you had met persons like me you wouldn't have thoughts like that.
    May be you end up dating trashy guys. Try shy guys and feel the difference.

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  • That's what players will do. Give a chance to the shy guy who looks but never approaches and you may be pleasantly surprised

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  • Because you are needy, give people 2nd chances when they dont need it, and dont know when to put your foot in the ground and take a stand.

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  • Same thing here but with girls. It sucks ik. I'm a loyal person 100% but i always seem to get hurt no matter what

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  • Next time you have a test try sitting next to a girl. Guys always cheat.

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  • looking for love in the wrong places?

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What Girls Said 6

  • I think it's just that you're meeting the wrong kind of men, maybe it has something to do with you being insecure perhaps? I'm just trying to think of reasons really, not necessarily saying you're insecure.

    May I ask why you dated that particular 47 year old man if you didn't find him attractive?

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  • It's probably that you're attracted to the wrong kind of guys. For instance, the 47 year old. A vast majority of 47 year old men don't date 20-something year old women because they have a lot in common and see a serious potential. It's because they see a hot bod and if that's all they really care about then of course they're not going to take the relationship seriously. Also, if that's a picture of you in your icon then I'd say the image you're projecting isn't helping matters.

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    • 22 year old guys are seriously looking at that hot bod too, I would say more so.

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    • It depends. I get along and have stuff in common with lots of older people. I guess you could be both in school but I don't really look at life as in being in different places once we're adults. I mean there is no rule or script you have to follow. It's probably not as good to date with that age difference but it could work out.

    • Most people at age 47 are already settled into a career and have kids and just want to enjoy the rest of their lives. Most people in their early twenties are just starting their careers or even still in school and they're just getting ready to start building a family. I'd consider those very different places. It could work out in cases where the younger person is really mature and the older person is looking for the same things, but I think those cases are extremely rare.

  • most guys will cheat. its not you , its how society is
    smh at people who act like u can control what a guy does to you
    but if a girl was to cheat on a guy, everyone would be offering him sympathy, not blaming him for choosing her

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  • Got to put your foot down and put your bitch heels on. You have to demand respect and no less. If he's being a jerk blow him off. If you're single for a little while longer so be it, you know how to work being single.
    Girl you've gone through so much bs for anything less than almost perfect. Don't be a push over, just cause you're sweet shouldn't mean you're weak.
    People who demand respect usually receive it.

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  • If this happens any time you date, and any people you date; there should be something about you. I am sorry , if i go further.
    I believe respect coming from anyone you know; is based on your behaviour.
    Respect is a such a feeling that you earn. It doesn't come from nowhere.
    You deserve better; sounds cheesy sorry for that. But it is. Believe that you are precious human being.
    If you are confident about yourself, you will see things get better. You will attract the decent guys and have a healthy relationships.

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  • Same thing happens with me. I have no idea why. I've just completely lost hope at this point.

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