i just left wife and two daughters?

i didn't want to be a dad anymore. it was way to stressful on me and my marriage was falling apart. the reason i didn't leave earlier was because of the fact that i loved my wife to much. but after seeing her loose interest in me i lost it and dove into alcohol. i drink way to much. anyway i have left my wife a check for over a million dollars worth of savings and i plan on taking a job in japan. i feel this is for the best they both deserve a man that will love them unconditionally and that man isn't me and it kills me i have to do this but i just do
Updates:
i meant to say lose

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Most Helpful Girl

  • daughters need a dad in their life- more importantly, they need THEIR dad. a lot of emotional and criminal problems in youth are presenting today and a lot are being proven that it is from having an absent father.

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    • i dont feel they would ever love me

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    • my drinking is out of control and being a dad is to stressful the ressponsibility is to much i just can't do it

    • you're to stressed and the responsibility is too much? think about the wife you are leaving. thats going to be double for her now. how could you do that to her? don't be weak and run away. you'll always regret it. go to therapy. quit wasting your money.

Most Helpful Guy

  • She lost interest. You moved on while in your prime. I applaud you for it.

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    • I'm going to punch you ><

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    • I think you're response above reflects a fairy tale perspective, actually. You seem to think that he'll be all fine and dandy just moving on... that's unlikely

    • @NoblesseOblige :(

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What Girls Said 11

  • I'm so sorry to hear that you're going through this. Once a relationship isn't working, it can be so hard to put together in good condition again, although people do it sometimes. It sounds like you draw so much from your relationship with your wife, and you are having negative thoughts and feelings about how that relationship is no longer what it was or is not what you were hoping for. That's sad so - however, if you have tried and have been unable to have a connect that you and your wife can share that satisfies you, then you are right in needing to make a change. I think you know that alcohol is not helping you here - and I'm afraid for you that it might be causing some of the issues and prolonging issues you could resolve without it. Address this drinking thing :/

    Children are usually better off with their fathers around, and I highly doubt yours are any exception to that - so please consider the impact your disappearing is going to have on them. You say being a father is too stressful - and I'm sure it's horrendous sometimes - but keep fighting, don't stop fighting, even if that means taking a break and trying to figure out why fatherhood stresses you out so much and how you might be able to reduce that stress so you don't lose your relationship with your children and they don't lose you. Visiting a shrink can be helpful, even if you don't like what they say, it's a place for you to process things and ruminate on them clearly and in your right mind.

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    • self care is so important, I'm glad you're taking steps to take care of yourself, while considering your families financial needs. Identifying all the things in your life, including your behavior and thoughts, that are preventing you from good self care would probably be super handy. I've seen in myself and others that once you start to tackle a few big things, the rest of your life begins to fall into line so that you are having much happier days, and are better able to cope with sad things like changes in your relationship. You are indeed young, so finding new people to fill your life up is almost inevitable once you start looking. Once you start caring for yourself, you might find that (like many people) your family is indeed a part of your needs and a fulfillment in life.

  • What do you want? A pat on the back? A million dollars will never make up for an absentee father.

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  • There is nothing wrong with leaving your wife just because you got her pregnant does not mean that you have to stay with her if you do not love her you have no obligation to be with her just because you both have a child together. however it is messed up that you left your kids. you shouldn't do that no matter how much money you should still be there for them

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  • You need to check into rehab. You will regret leaving them when you're older, my dad was in the same boat and he feels horrible now, he's 45.

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  • Do you think you'd love your kids more if your wife payed more attention to you? If so then you guys should consider couple therapy

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  • Ouch. I don't know what to say. I hope things get better, however that means, for both of you.

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  • When you sound annoying as fuck. Who would want you -_-

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  • That is very sad

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  • How old are your daughters? If they are too young enough, please don't leave for the sake of them. If they are old enough to understand, then you can let them understand and be happy with your life.
    I came from broken family. My dad left us when I was 7 yrs. Old. Before that, he always get drunk and be with his friends in bar (his reason was my mom doesn't care for him anymore). If he goes home drunk my mom is sad and my dad started to feel bad too. They end up with fight infront of us (sometimes in their room). Till my dad left the business and all his other properties to my mom. I asked mom why dad did it. Mom said I wouldn't understand because im too young. She said its between them why my dad left and not between him and me so I shouldn't think of it.
    The impact for me was so bad when my dad left. I love my dad so much. I don't understand why he needs to get drunk instead spend his time playing with me? Is he not strong enough to fix his problem? Is walking away the real solution? Why just go on long vacation to vent and come back? I started to think that I was burden for him. I'm nothing. I'm worthless kid. I can't make my dad happy because if he's happy he won't leave me. He will bring me. I feel I'm a miserable daughter. From that age till I was teenager I started to become man hater. I lost hope. I believe the family is the basic unit of society but without a dad, is broken. I feel im broken too. I live a miserable life because the person I love so much (my dad) abandoned me, us. I don't need to be rich with his business, I need him.
    My life is empty. What changed my life was when I join to religious org., undergo reflection, counsel, meditation and everything, understand God's love, etc. It didn't helped me to put my family back into whole but it made my anger, hatred, sadness and all the negative burden I felt be free.. Now I'm not man hater anymore, I forgave myself, my family and I still love my dad so much that I wanna hug him so tight.

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  • I don't know what to tell you dude but that people don't really know whawt they have until they lose it.

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  • Meshwar ashra7lak

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