Why did he decide to leave me when everything seemed right? So hurt and need answers/advice.?

A lot of you might think I'm pathetic for being this hurt over something so short-lived but I genuinely thought he was different and I was falling hard for him fast. So basically I met this guy in a bar back in April (a little over a month ago). That started the long list of dinner dates, etc. He was a little shy but a nice guy. At first I did not want to start something because it was the end of the academic year and because he seemed to awkward, but I wanted to give it a shot. He texted me everyday after work and I came home after the semester ended for two weeks but planned on coming down over memorial day to get the rest of my stuff from school and spend a nice weekend with him that we planned. Leading up to that weekend I kept dropping hints questioning about where this relationship was going. He said he was willing to try anything and over Skype he asked me how I felt about him being deployed for 4 months in a few months. Okay, I never said I would be okay with it or it didn't matter, I kind of just brushed off the idea. It seemed like he liked me and that he kept telling me that it was okay to get attached and to not worry about what was going on between us whenever I questioned our status. I told him that since we had sex I was becoming attached and he would say "What is wrong with getting attached?" Anyways, the past weekend was okay. Saturday I got upset at the fact that we went to a movie I did not want to go to (I know immature but he didn't want to go either and only went b/c of a friend) and Sunday at the hotel we drank and I asked him "So are you going to ask me out or not?" Thinking he would ask me out. I don't really remember what he said but basically that he didn't want to continue pursuing this relationship. I was pissed I just spent a weekend with a guy that didn't want anything serious, especially after him seeming like he wanted something more. He told me he didn't want to miss/be missed during deployment.
That I was already too emotional and deployment hadn't even arrived and we weren't even dating. He would also be going underway in June and me on vacation in July so we wouldn't get much time to spend anyways before his deployment.
Even though it would be two months. I asked him why he couldn't just take it day by day and he said he wanted to do this before I got more attached. I appreciate it and all but why would he have this weekend with me and then do this?


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  • He just used you for sex. Sorry honey. It sounded like he just used the romance of him being deployed and your feelings to get what he wanted. He's a pig and you deserve better. Don't let that dick wad bother you ! The best thing you can do is eat some ice cream and move on.

  • I honestly think he liked you too and at the time he wanted someone more. Or at least he thought he did. But I think he got scared of his own feelings and started to pull away. It's easier to walk away then face your feelings.


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