But I can't stop thinking about him. It's kinda weird cuz he was my best friend and I hurt him so much. I still feel guilty for it it daily and I hope he's doing okay.
THe last thing he wrote to me is that he'll text me after court to call me to talk but he hasn't. I tried to be strong and not give in cuz my job to care that much was over. He never told me in the past other weeks he was going to court, so for it to happen to suddenly is scary cuz he said he'll do something stupid.
I just woke up this morning tired and hazy. However 30 minutes ago I started to really think about him and i broke out in tears. I know I don't love him to same anymore but I still care a lot when I pretend not too.
I just sent him a text saying hello to check up on him. I feel like an emotional shipwreck. I've never broken up with anyone before so I'm wondering if that's why I'm crying so hard now.