She broke up with me because she says she is too old for me. What do I say?

We broke up a few months ago and are still friends. She basically has used the logic that she is too old for me and if she wants to have more kids then she needs to have them soon. (I would have kids in the next few years but I never told her that because it would sound like I am just making it up)

She is 36 I am 26. I don't need any judging comments. I love her. When I was with her I was a little bad at showing my commitment to her even though I was committed to her.

Is there any way you guys can think of showing her that I am capable of settling down and being serious.

I know she still loves me. She told me today but her annoying logic is stopping her from following her heart.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Age is a problem for a lot of women. For long term relationships you need to stay away from older women. They just have too many issues if the man is younger. I don't think she is as into you as she claims. Nor is she likely to find a guy willing to be a father in the next few years, unless she tricks him into it. She likely knows that. She may want to get pregnant, but she still doesn't want you as the father. If she does love you, then maybe she just doesn't want to trick you into it. Although I doubt that is the case. When a woman wants a kid, typically nothing else matters.

    Also a few years to you, will place her around 40, when a lot of women can't get pregnant, and many of the children born to 40 year old mothers, have health issues. So if she wants a kid, she needs to get knocked up now. Unless you want to be a father 9 months from now, it simply won't change that you don't want to be a father right now.

    Your options are offer to be the father now, which may or may not work, or find a new girl closer to your age. If you do offer to be the father and she says no, then it is simply because she was just looking for an excuse to break up with you.

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What Girls Said 4

  • maybe you should tell her to follow her heart and that, and she doesn't really have to get kids that soon, but say that you love her and if she loves you back, why not just go with it? Age is a state of mind as someone wise said

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  • Tell her how you feel, be honest. But if you're not ready to have a family and commit, then let her be. Let her go.

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  • Ask her to marry you and then see what happens.

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  • Heart and logic are both required to make good decisions. At 36 she really doesn't have a few years to wait, if she wants more kids. That's a rational reason not to be with you. However, she still has to meet another man, date him, get him to commit. . . this all takes time too. Breaking up with you is no guarantee for her to have kids sooner.

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    • Exactly! I forgot to mention. She has been dating a guy for a month maybe. He's older than her.

      Today she said that you need to work at relationships and give them a chance. And I said (about them) "There is no point pushing for something that isn't there, you are just tying to fill a void, that';s why I'm not worried about him" And she immediately said "How do you know?" like I was right.

      I don't just want to come out with "I want to have kids with you" when we aren't even together.

      How do I show her?

    • Are you sure this is what you want? Don't change how you want your life, that will lead to resentment of her down the road.

What Guys Said 2

  • uuuhmmm... sorry but she's right.

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  • There's nothing you can say, you just have to accept her decision and move on.

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