Are we over for good? I need break up advise?

My boyfriend and I started dating last summer. My bff was not too excited about us, so we kept us a secret, because we only had one week together before he moved six hours away. I thought it wasn't going to last. But we stayed in touch, and after six months we started to daydream about the future. I was moving to his city in the fall. The secret relationship was hard for us though, and when he came home two weeks ago we started dating in public, as the world believed we just met. My bff was cool with it. Problem is, he broke up with me last night. He said keeping him a secret had made him feel like a low prioroty, and accused me of putting my bff before him, since I wouldn't tell her. How do you tell someone after six months you've had a boyfriend? Our friendship would be over, but he doesen't understand this. He said it had killed almost all the feelings he had for me, at least made them a lot weaker than it was last summer, when he was very much in love with me.

Last week, we spent the night at our second house, ate some delicious food, talked, lied in the sun, listened to music and had a great time. He mentioned this when he broke up and said he was surprised over how good it was. It was like we had no problems at all, it was like last summer.

My question is, are we completely over? He said he had been thinking about this the last couple of months, and that he had really, really tried, and he thought I was a great girl and he wanted to be with me, but his feelings were chased away by my wish to keep us a secret, to not hurting my bff (I'm not really a bad friend, it is another story, not important to this). He said he has feelings for me, but they were weak, but I think about our little trip and what wonderful time we had. I think there is still something there. He says there is nothing wrong with who I am, the problem is what is around us. How can anyone throw away 11 months in two weeks? I want him to fall in love with me again. Is it even possible
  • We'll get back together.
    Vote A
  • We'll not get back together.
    Vote B
  • I don't know.
    Vote C
  • There's a small chance.
    Vote D
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Please help me :(


Most Helpful Girl

  • I just went though something similar. :-(
    One weekend my ex boyfriend took me to his parents... he said he was super happy, that I was his love and his pride. Next weekend (after a fight), he was not sure he wanted to try again... cause the feelings were not the same.
    Two weekends after (after I tried to make it work again), he said he didn't love me anymore.
    So... if he gave you the "my feelings are not the same" speech, just walk away. He already made up his mind. If you continue fighting for him, you will hurt yourself unnecessarily.


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What Girls Said 2

  • If bff should support you. You can't ruin your love life because of her.
    Forget keeping a secret, this is your business, not theirs.
    Look, tell him to give you another chance.
    You WON'T keep it a secret this time. If he hesitates, remind him why you did it.
    And how dumb of you thay you kept it a secret when it wasn't nothing bad. Just your fear for your friendship.
    If he takes you back, you know what to do.
    If your friends doesn't like him, well that's their problem. He makes you happy, go for it.

  • Yeah you are probably done and its for the best


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